The Boy Next Door
by StendanFicz
Summary: Brendan gets new nieghbours. One of them is Ste and after meeting one night the pair strike up a new friendship that changes their lives. Collaboration with Loltiangela. Stendan AU. Rated M for later chapters. *Complete*
1. Chapter 1

Another collaboration with my dear friend Loltiangela.  
I'd already a random plot for a new short fic in mind so I have just combined both our ideas together.  
It's basically a Stendan filled AU story. Rated M for later parts and it's fluffy. (It's me)

Written as a one shot this will progress quickly and have a conclusion. As my time is limited I will edit and post this in chapters. xx

* * *

The Boy Next Door.

July.

The letterbox rattled as a pile of mail fell through hitting the rug beneath it with a dull thud, the familiar noise encouraging Brendan to look up and push himself off the kitchen counter. Half eaten warm toast held between his teeth, he bent down to retrieve the different envelopes and papers in his hands. Brendan's eyes glanced wearily over them, mostly bills and some leaflets he'd never use in his life.

Chewing the remainder of his breakfast, Brendan opened the front door and ventured out to place the unwanted leaflets into the recycle bag on the doorstep. The binmen were already making their way around the early morning lit streets so he grabbed it and took it all the way to the front of the house.

There was a warm heat off the sun as it journeyed high into the clouds, yellow orange glow painting the morning skyline. Brendan leaned his head back to take it all in, it was nice to feel the fresher air against his skin after spending the night at unease. Having struggled with sleep from an early age, Brendan took the condition to adulthood and rarely slept well. The evenings were long thanks to the summer solstice leaving the days drawn out and reflective for him.

The rolling thrum of an engine sounded nearby and broke Brendan of his thoughts, the large box van parked up on the pavement next door, 'removals' painted on the side. Brendan quirked his eyebrow watching it manoeuvre. There had been no neighbours next door for a few months now and the quiet had become the norm. Two burly men exited the cab, laughing and joking, a little loud for such an early hour perhaps as they opened up the back. A tall woman pushed open the squeaky wooden gate and then slowed her steps shooting her gaze at Brendan.

"Morning" She said painting a brief smile and using her hand to flick the long blonde hair back from her eyes. Brendan nodded in gesture.

"Morning to ye, finally getting some new neighbours I see."

"Oh it's not me" The woman scoffed, hand arched on her chest. A slight horror to her expression glancing back at the house."I am just the estate agent, said I'd open the place up for my clients, get the furniture in for them"

"Clients? So more than one of them" Brendan turned to walk with the lady while she moved to unlock the door. "I don't suppose ye can tell me anything about them? Do I need to prepare?"

The woman stopped short of placing the key in the door and considered Brendan's words. "Prepare? What do you mean?"

"Well, I'm thinking Texas Chainsaw Massacre type prepare" Brendan replied, watched the girl double over in fits. His eyes widen like saucers. He hadn't been joking.

"Oh, you're funny! No, they are lovely." She paused to think. "One is a little quiet mind, doesn't say much. And you do have to watch the quiet ones huh?" She smiles and winks opening the door to disappear. Brendan licks his lips and glances back at the furniture being brought up the pathway.

* * *

"How many rooms has it got?" Amy asks rushing into the house, holdall over her shoulder. She sprints up the stairs before anyone can answer her. Tony wanders in next, head shaking he assesses his surroundings, drawing a finger against the kitchen counter. He scrunches his nose up at the dirt collected on the tip.

"Well, this wont do. How am I supposed to have any creativity in a kitchen like this?" Tony says, his arms tighten around his chest. Ste shakes his head at him and swings his bag around dumping it on the floor.

"Tone, can't you just be happy we found somewhere? It took ages for somet like this to become available." Ste has a good look around eyeing up the door in the far corner. "I like it, reckon it's got personality"

"Personality? It's bricks and mortar Ste, not some kind of being" Tony holds his hand on his hips.

"Tony, I wasn't being literal. Relax! It's a great house"

"Yeah and it's tons better than the student accommodation on the campus!" Rae flung her arms over Ste's shoulders giggling as she does. Ste pulls on her arms so he can hold her there, her enthusiasm causing a big smile upon his face.

"See? Not that hard to be happy ey?" Ste says, he looks up the stairs at Amy who appears again, all giddy.

"Rae, you gotta get up here, the bedrooms are huuuge! Quick before these two get them!" Rae immediately slid off Ste's back and galloped up the steps leaving Ste and Tony to watch them. Tony moved to stand by his friend then, curling an arm around him he looked down at Ste's beaming face.

"I suspect we'll end up sharing."

"No, it's cool. I'll take the spare room down here, looks like a study but I can make it into a bedroom." Ste guides Tony to the room he means and when they enter it's a good size too. No furniture in place yet, it's hollow and echoes their footsteps along the laminate floor.

"It'll look good with my bed an stuff in here, just needs a lick of paint" Ste walks to the curtains pulling them apart, dust swirling from them show tell tale signs of how long the house had been unoccupied. The house next door takes up his intrigue, there's a silver BMW parked in the driveway.

"Oo, we have rich neighbours"

Tony slid next to Ste and stretched his neck up looking through the window. "Hmm. It could be a company car. Let's just hope they're nice" Tony says taking a last look before leaving Ste alone with his thoughts.

* * *

"We should have a house warming party!" Amy coos walking through to the lounge, bowlful of popcorn in her arms. She sits crossed legged on the sofa. "What do you think guys?"

"I'm up for it" Rae says, her arms are full of drinks which she settles carefully on the coffee table. "We can invite some of our friends around too"

"Hang on, we can't have a massive party, just moved in remember. Ya gonna get us thrown out already" Tony interrupted the excitement, the mood deflated like a popped balloon. They all stared at him leaving Tony to swallow nervously.

"I just meant...a low key affair"

Ste found his way over to the small bar in the corner of the room, bent down on his legs a moment to look behind it at all the various shaped glasses. The cupboard was bare of any alcohol though, just the odd few paper umbrella's and straws laid on a thin coat of dust. Ste dragged his fingers through it and brushed it off with a quick clap.

"Tony means well. We can have a party, even got a bar!" Ste places his alms wide against the dark mahogany bar and grins.

"All I meant was, let's not alienate the neighbours yeah? Because I like the house"

"I knew it!" Ste pointed at his friend with a big smile on his face.

"Speaking of which. Next door, have you seen him yet? I have...looks a bit weird to me" Rae practically whispered into the room sending it eerily quiet. It caught everyone's attention though, not least of all Ste.

"Must have money, seen the car in the driveway an it's dead posh"

"It's not that posh Ste" Tony scoffed throwing some popcorn in his mouth.

"So it's a guy living next door is it?" Ste queried, turning his head to look out of the window. There was a collective giggle around the room then, and Ste jerked his head back. His friends all smiling at each other. "What did I say?"

"Might be just what the doctor ordered huh?" Rae smirked. "Since your last disastrous encounter, you've needed a push in the right direction"

"Oh yeah!" Amy agreed and bounded over to the curtains. She peered out at the house opposite, neck stretched tall "Is he not good looking then? What about single?"

"Erm, _excuse me_ , stood in the room thank you very much!" Ste exasperated. Even Tony had the beginnings of a lavish smile. "Don't need you lot match making right. I do just fine as I am. And besides, Rae just said he's weird"

Everyone looked at Rae then. "What? He does, kinda. moustache and stubble and..."

"And?" Tony looked up, he wanted to know now too. Ste gawped at the lot of them.

"Moody looking" Rae closed her mouth, shrugged. "Not my type anyhow, plus he's old"

"Moody and old. Now I am _really_ interested" Ste spoke with a hint of sarcasm, slightly put out by his friends' interfering.

"Gotta be better than when I almost threw myself at you after tequila night." Rae chuckled thinking about it "In my defense, I was pretty tipsy though"

"Ta again" Ste plonked himself on the arm of the sofa after grabbing a beer in his hand. "Why can't ya set Tony up instead for a change"

"Because I am off the market Ste, bigger fish to fry - literally!" Tony chuckled at his own joke while Ste watched his friends chat among themselves. He chewed the inside of his mouth stretching his neck back to look at the house next door. He couldn't help but be curious.

* * *

"Good afternoon sleepy head!" Tony spoke cheerfully dashing around the kitchen when Ste opened his bedroom door. He yawned heavily and rubbed at the red sting of his eyes before sitting down at the kitchen table.

"Ya know I can't sleep well Tone." Ste had his head down grumbling into the fold of his arms. He held his head up again and took a double take of the kitchen practically gleaming. "Did ya tidy up?"

"We've been here a week, of course I have Ste. Cleanliness is next to godliness in the preparation area, one of the first things I taught you, remember?"

"How could I forget. Looks ace in here though. What ya making today then, something new?" Ste couldn't help but smile at his friend stood at the counter by the chopping board. It was his calling in life, to be an amazing chef.

"Yeah! Do you wanna learn from the best? You are my brightest student after all" Tony mused in a high pitched posh voice, gesturing Ste over to him. Ste brightened despite his tiredness at the lack of sleep. It didn't help his energy much but Ste made an effort besides.

"Give us the knife then, want me to chop?"

"Finely please Ste, we need more garlic cloves too."

"You ever think about the future Tone? Like what you'll do after college?" Ste asks, chops the basil in front of him.

"Not really, I do love my cooking though. Maybe a restaurant huh? I'd suit a chef hat. Watch your fingers, don't want that into the mix"

"Hm, a restaurant. I'd come work for ya then, you can teach me all your ideas...then I can take over and make you head waiter" Ste laughs seeing Tony's face.

"It's a deal, if I get my restaurant you come and work for me, if you haven't found something, or _someone_ better else to do. I'd be honoured in fact, you're my best mate Ste"

"Aww!" Ste bumps Tony on his shoulder. "So now I boil the garlic cloves, right? I'm only kidding! I doubt I'll find anything else, got all I need here ain't I? Just wish I could sleep occasionally."

"Had such an impact on you though, you growing up with that vile step father of yours. I'm glad ya came with us in the end Ste, even if it took some persuading, it's made such a difference with the studying. And with this being your last year, the world will be your oyster. I have to admit, I did have my doubts about this place but, you're right, this house is great. All of us here together, gonna make a go of things. Starting with this dish, thought I said _finely_ chopped?"

"All right, keep ya apron on! This is finely chopped, just fussy. Only reason I relented was cos ya all wouldn't shop nagging me. Nah, it was the right thing to do. The last year has flown by, hope this one does too."

* * *

After they'd all eaten together in the evening, the close friends all sat down together. Amy put the TV on and trawled through the movie channels until they all found a film they'd all watch. The hours passed by quickly and all too soon the girls were falling asleep. Ste's eyes met Tony's across the room, they'd both chucked at Amy and Rae and leaving Tony the one shaking them awake, Ste bid goodnight to him.

Ste moved into his bedroom and released a long breath bumping himself on the bed. He didn't get undressed because there wasn't much use as Ste didn't always sleep well. Losing count of the many nights he'd spend awake and restless. It was way past midnight now and the sky was black besides the stars and slither of moonlight. Ste's head laid heavy on his pillow tilting towards the window, gazing through the half open curtains to look at the evening sky. It seemed more inviting than his room view so when the noise of everyone else going to bed had eased off, Ste decided to go outside into the garden.

The back of the house was half lawn and half patio with a cluster of garden furniture dotted around. Air thick with the close heat of summer, a wooden bench became Ste's solace sitting down, arms stretched out. His head hung back and took in the view of the stars and the blue black of the clouds outlined by the moon. Ste dragged the warm evening air into his lungs and hoped it could help lull him into a sleepy disposition.

After a little while had passed, when his eyelids droop that little bit heavier it becomes clear he wasn't alone. A shuffling in the garden next door alerted Ste's hearing. His head fell to one side seeing another figure sat out too, glass in his hand. The man wasn't looking at the stars, more so the drink he held. Ste gulped and let his mouth part a little, he wasn't sure whether to move or not, or even speak.

In his mind was a picture, an image of Rae's description. He felt odd because of it and presumptuous, how could he know anything unless he saw for himself. The man suddenly held back his head then, sniffed loud and obvious.

"Can ye not be quieter? Those thoughts of yours are annoying" Brendan spoke with a tired, antsy tone, his northern Irish accent thick and piercing the silence around them.

Ste opened his mouth wider in surprise, having not realised he'd been noticed too. The words he wanted to say found to be difficult.

"What do ye gain from staring so much, besides a crick in the neck?" The other man turned to look at Ste then, his eyes were dark and hidden as they glared back.

"I didn't mean to stare, thought I were alone out here" Ste gathered his courage standing up and traveled the short space to the fence, hands gripping the wood. "Can't you sleep either?"

"What makes ye think that?"

"Well, it's late init. Past midnight, most people are asleep. I know my house mates are"

Ste took a brief moment to look back at the house, every room dark besides his own. He's forgotten to turn the bedside lamp off so it left a low glow through his window and shed some insight into his bedroom. He'd glanced back at the man who was now stood up with him, he was looking too, quietly.

There wasn't much to see, besides his duvet pulled back across the bed, his door that had been left ajar and the hideous wallpaper. He'd definitely have to redecorate at some point. Ste realised he was again over thinking and properly registered his neighbour.

"I always struggle to sleep" Brendan spoke again, eyes firmly on Ste.

"Me too, since I were a kid...I seem think a lot at night" Ste explained, still trying to work out the man next door. A part of Ste wished there wasn't such low light in the back gardens, no false light from the street lamps to aid his view of him.

"The house okay is it? Not had any problems?" Brendan asked, took his lips to the rim of his glass and drank slowly. Brendan watched the bump of Ste's throat captured by the slither of moonlight shading his outline.

"Not so far, it's good, yeah. Early days yet. Why you ask?"

"Heard it was haunted, that's why the last uns' left. Usually when it's a full moon by all accounts" Brendan's lips formed a slight smile, eyes darting at Ste. He could see his mouth widening.

"What, oh great. No wonder the rent is so good. The girls won't like that"

"Just the girls?"

"Well, Tony won't be happy, but I ain't fussed" Ste broadened his shoulders.

"No? Right then, so that shadow appearing by the window behind ye...won't bother ye at all"

"Very funny" Ste moved further forward and stopped opposite Brendan who chuckled to himself swigging back the drink in his hand.

"Hm" Brendan nodded, leaning down into Ste's space. "I'm Brendan. Not spoken to anyone in a while. Usually unearthly quiet around here"

"Besides the spirits?" Ste mused. "I'm Ste. Took us a while to find a place big enough for the lot of us"

Ste tried to study the taller man in front of him and cursed the night for getting in the way, the moon trying it's best whenever it passed through the annoying clouds. The air was invitingly warm though, the summer months just getting started.

"You don't seem weird" Ste says in passing, eyes searching the skies. He knows it's an odd thing to say but he means it, thinking about what Rae had said earlier.

"Thanks I guess. Ye don't seem quiet. Quite the contrary"

"Eh?"

"The estate agent mentioned one of ye was quiet, not ye obviously."

"What estate agent?"

"The one who opened up the day ye moved in."

"Nope" Ste shook his head, arms folding. "We never had an agent, this house belongs to Rae's grandmother, why we got it so cheap in fact. Must be seeing things"

"That so" Brendan slid his free hand into his pocket, eyes curious on Ste. The younger boy smirked and let out a chuckle.

"Oh, I see what ye did there. Funny man too"

"Thought you'd seen a ghost Brendan?"

The smirk didn't leave Ste for a good while and just as they had first started off, there was a silence between both of them. The stars provided the scenery and the gulps of their throats and soft breathing the sounds. Occasionally Ste would break his view and dart his eyes at the stranger next door. They could have been stood next to each other except for the wooden panel fence that separated them. A breeze that had gathered up momentum bristled though the trees and then the space between them. It encouraged their eyes to meet again.

Ste sighed before looking back at the house. "I'd best get in, leave you in peace."

"Should make a move myself" Brendan slowed the way to his back door, angled his head to the side slightly. "See ye around"

"Yeah, probably will meet again" Ste's smile doesn't seem to leave his lips and Brendan can just about see the outline of it in the low light. The weight from around his shoulders lightened somehow.

"May be" Brendan replies, eyes fixed on to the younger boy as he walks back to his house.

* * *

"Ye know, I can think of many other things I'd rather be doing than this" Brendan grumbled as he was dragged out of a taxi by his friend. Her smile persuasive, he tried not to mirror it and instead kept a flat expression. The nightclub stood tall and lit up the building with it's bright effects. They'd been here before, a few times in the past that Anne had managed to get away with. It hadn't stopped her though, determined to get Brendan to tag along and have fun occasionally. A task easier said than done.

"Oh stop being a grump will you? Every time I bring you out with me I get Mr boring. It's the holidays, live a little!"

Brendan draws out a sigh and grins animatedly for her benefit. He narrowly escapes a berating. "Fine, for ye I will stay an hour"

"Make it two and I will buy the first drink AND keep a look out for some boy candy for you while we're in there" Anne winks and licks the red gloss of her lips. Brendan goes to speak but stops and let's her bask in the fact she's won as usual. Inside the club is dark and the strobe lights make his eyes restless. There's not much to see besides the bustle of people on the dance floor, his gaze finds the bar and that's his place for the evening.

"Go on, I'll get the drinks, red wine I take it?"

"For now yeah. Thanks love. I am going to mingle. Don't prop up that bar for too long"

He doesn't listen and stays at the bar. For the first hour Brendan sits and orders drinks for them both, his whiskey rimmed the glass many times as he sat there. Boredom setting in, he began to focus on the voices of people who ordered their drinks, different accents shouting against the loud music. There was one voice though, that stood out with it's familiarity. Brendan raised his eyebrows before turning to look to his side. The man stood there holding his body tip toe tall to get the barman's attention. Wearing blue jeans and a loose t shirt that rode up higher the more he stretched. Brendan noticed the small glimmer of sweat against his skin, beaded there in the pulsing light display around them.

He'd obviously been dancing because his chest heaved slightly and the grin on his mouth showed an influx of adrenaline that soured through him. The younger boy continued his arduous task, putting his arm up and yelling his order to busy bar staff that didn't notice him at all. Brendan whistled loudly and caught the barman's eye line, then pointing to his neighbour stood next to him. Ste glanced at Brendan and then let the staff take his drinks order, head turning again because he recognised him despite the darkness of the club surroundings. Noticeable in his inky shirt with white detailing and suit trousers that clung like a second skin, Brendan watched Ste checking him out and when their eyes met again Brendan gestured his glass in greeting.

Ste closed his mouth that had held loose and flustered, turned back to the barman paying him what he'd asked for.

"Ta by the way" Ste spoke and angled his body around the bar stool in his way. "Didn't think this would be your thing"

"Oh, and why is that then?" Brendan took a sip of his whiskey and placed it on the bar toying with the glass.

"Dunno, I just...soz. Shouldn't make assumptions. Can I get you a drink?"

"I've had a couple, not sure if having a third will help me get out of here quicker" Brendan notices Ste's confusion so he leans nearer to him, slowly, eyes sparkling temptation. Ste is hypnotised looking into his eyes and then to his mouth. Brendan smiles. "I've been brought here by a friend"

"Ah, an ya tried to get out of it, right?" Ste's eyes are limpid under the lights in the club, wide and blink the longest sweeping shadow down his cheek bones and Brendan can't stop looking at them, at him. He half blames the drink in his hand.

"Correct. What about ye?" Brendan asks and scans the dance floor behind him. "Ye here with friends, girlfriend?"

"Oh no, no girlfriend. Just my flatmates, bit bored though. An tired." Ste admits and jumps up on the stool, invites himself into Brendan's personal space and angles enough they can take each other in. It's not like the other night, there's no evening air but the atmosphere is still thick and warm around them. They're touching, Ste's knee connecting with Brendan's and it strikes him how neither of them flinched apart but stayed comfortable. The bar tender places the drinks he's ordered on a tray, slides it towards Ste and breaking his gaze. He takes a beer and swigs it back while Brendan focuses on the slide of his Adams apple.

"What?" Ste grins around the neck of the bottle, takes another drink.

"Nothing" Brendan gazes at his glass again, tilts it to his smirking lips.

"No one catching your eye in here Brendan? You're pretty popular" Ste points to a group of girls dancing together that keep looking over at them and giggling as they dance. Brendan raises a brow and looks back at Ste.

"It's ye they are looking at, who could blame them"

Ste turns to Brendan, removes the bottle from his lips. "You reckon"

"Might be, best go over and flutter those eyelashes of yours at them"

Ste darts his eyes with Brendan's, the light still catching the glint of them. He curves his bottom lip below his teeth. "Not interested, not my type"

"Really. Just those girls or..."

"Or" Ste answers. "So why ain't ya dancing then? Been sat here ages propping the bar up"

"Ye been watchin me all night or something?" Brendan asks, muses when he turns to Ste. The light captures the beam of his smile.

"I've been on the floor, can't help looking around the place can I. You should get out there"

"Why? Are ye askin?" A hand touches Brendan's right shoulder distracting them both. Anne appears next to him, slides her slender body beside Brendan and looks at Ste then her friend.

"What's going on here then?"

"I'd best get back to my mates." Ste pushes up grabbing the tray off the bar and disappears into the dancing crowds. Anne and Brendan watch and then she plants herself right in front of him, fingertip pushing into the top of his shoulder.

"He was _gorgeous_. Please tell me he's perfectly available"

"Not for ye he ain't" Brendan smirks and turns back to the bar.

"How do ya do that? And sat at the bar!"

"What can I tell ye, the Irish charm doesn't fail. Nah, he's my neighbour. We've already been introduced"

"Oh cripes, how convenient, the boy next door." Anne licks the top of her lips and preceded to get herself another drink, charming the barman with her many talents. Brendan shakes his head at her and then looks behind him again.

* * *

"Are you sure you won't come along with us Ste? Haven't had a long night out in ages, the club is meant to be fantastic too" Rae drapes herself over Ste while they stand outside the nightclub, the air is cooler and the evening still bright with a dusky pink sky blanketed above them. Club goers around them are loud and brash with the consumption of alcohol in their bloodstream and Ste is just about tipsy now and he's not really in the mood to get beyond that, to the point he doesn't recall what happened the night before. Ste feels a bit like the party pooper of the group, especially as Tony is more than up for it with his merry ways.

"Nah, I'm not feeling it tonight guys, gonna take a cab home."

"What?! And miss out on all the fun?" Tony slurs his words accompanied by a laugh. Amy giggling with him latched firmly to his stronger body weight. "Come on Ste, I thought you'd be first in line"

"Maybe another night. I'm tired. S'okay for you lot, getting eight hours sleep a night. I don't get that luxury" Ste shrugged, they all turned to the taxi that pulls up and when they're all seated Ste leans in with a big smile.

"Don't do owt I wouldn't"

"Well that's us limited then ain't it?" Amy jokes, heaves herself up to hug Ste tight. "You get straight home okay? Love you"

"Love ya too, all of you. Have a good night" Ste pushes the cab door shut and waves his friend off, another taxi takes him home.

* * *

The sky is beginning to darken over when he arrives back, and after paying the driver Ste fumbles with his keys walking up the pathway and drops them with a jangle. A noise has Ste turning sharply around, but there's nobody that he can see. There are footsteps but faint and seem in the distance from him.

As the hair on the back of his neck alerts him there's something wrong, Ste knows then he isn't alone any longer. The smell hits him first, in all the years past by the stench of stale beer never changed. Ste felt instantly sick to his stomach, nerves making his smaller body shake. Ste swallowed and started to walk to his front door, he just had to get inside it.

"Where are you going huh? Did I give ya permission to walk off?"

"Go away. You're not welcome here" Ste spoke, shake to his voice. The footsteps behind him quickened forcing Ste to make haste to the front door, his key slipped against the lock leaving the person behind to catch up.

"Always were a cocky little shit, should of slapped some more manners into ya" The man sneered, preyed on Ste until he was too close for comfort and he was trapped.

"Go away, my mates are gonna be back any second right, better leave before the cops are called"

"You're lying. I saw them go off without ya"

Ste spins around and is faced with his step father, leaning near enough his foul smelling breath makes him ill. Eyes dilated and angry. Ste flicks his eyes down as Terry grips his top in hardened fists and lifts the young boy to his tip toes. "That's right, I made sure you'd be alone. Now your mother needs some money, so I thought I'd be a gentleman and come round and get it from her waster son."

"You ain't no gentleman, gentle ain't in your nature. Had the bruises to prove that"

"Well, it would only be right to remind ya how to speak to your father, bring those pretty bruises back again." Terry taunts back, slaps Ste across the face, humiliates him. Ste feels the tears tickle down the curve of his cheekbones and settle in the corner of his mouth.

"I haven't any money, ya had some last time. Just leave me alone..."

"Aww, you poor thing. I'm nearly welling up, turning me soft being in your company. Better not be catching, else I'll have to beat it out of you, nancy boy" Terry drops Ste to the ground.

"I fucking _hate_ you" Ste sobs, manages to pull himself up. Looks up at Terry smiling, then Ste turns his attention to a blur in the background and holds his breath. With Ste clearly stunned, Terry intrigued turns to look behind him but he doesn't get chance.

Ste is speechless watching his neighbour stride up the path without any thought, he's tall and broad shouldered. Face straight with no emotion and his eyes fixed. Pulling Terry by the hair, Brendan walks him backwards and out of the gate. Terry is loud as he protests but Brendan doesn't halt. Ste moves himself fast to the gate, mouth wide his hands grip the faded paint on the wood bruising the tips of them. Ste watches with a held breath, Brendan drag Terry to the end of the street proceeding to throw him away and landing the man firmly on this side.

There are heated words exchanged but Ste can't hear what is said but he can see Brendan overshadowing Terry's limp body. In a moment Ste has never witnessed before, his stepdad crawls away on his hands and knees and when he's out of sight Brendan waits a moment or two before he makes his way back to Ste. He sniffs sharply when he gets there, stands in front of Ste and looks down on him with a blank face.

"What did ya say to im?" Ste asks, voice hoarse and mouth loose he looks up at Brendan.

"I told that lowlife, if I ever saw him on our street again I'd make sure he'd end up in a skip at the local refuse site. I'm all for recycling rubbish me" Brendan admitted with a short nod to the head. Ste began to smile then.

"Did ya really say that? He'd have killed me for opening me gob. Thank you, you didn't have to though, but I appreciate it."

"Neighbourhood watch, giving back to the community"

"Really?"

"Nope, that was a joke. I wasn't gonna stand by though. Just sorry I didn't get here sooner, ye gonna be alright?"

"Yeah, not the first time this sort of thing. I've had worse believe me, if you hadn't of turned up..."

"Good job I came home when I did then" Brendan says, takes a look around them. "Who is he?"

"My step dad, Terry. Gutted he's found me, probs have to move now"

"Don't worry, he won't be back. Unless he wants through me first" Brendan notices the drying tear trails on Ste's face. "You're shaken up, get indoors, come on I'll walk with ye."

"You left the club early too, both of us light weights." Ste walks up his path while Brendan walks with him, waits until Ste opens his front door.

"Yeah well, I didn't really wanna be there in the first place, but Anne, she's persuasive" Brendan says, he looks Ste over carefully. The way his eyelashes flutter because they're that long. The glow from the street lamps leaving a speck of light in the corner of his widened eyes. "Although, maybe it wasn't so bad in the end. Depends on the company ye keep, don't it?"

"Yep, you're not wrong. Ta again and um...I'll see ya round, again"

"Hey, ye need owt or if that trash calls again, let me know alright"

"I will. Night" Ste agrees and closes the door behind him.

* * *

Ste is out of the house early one morning making his way to the bus stop a short distance from his home. He sits waiting for the next bus to take him into town where his shift starts in about an hour, a part time job he'd acquired at a coffee shop. During the summer he'd asked for more shifts with nothing else to do until he returns to college. He's the only one sat here and there's very few cars on the road. He thinks everyone decided to lie in besides him, and Ste could do with the sleep.

Further up the road, Brendan walked out of his front door and down the path to his gate. His head turned to look both ways before moving out and starting into a jog along the pavement. Dressed in a white vest and loose shorts he moved at a steady pace towards the bus shelter. Ste absently looked up hearing the sound of a person running. Mouth parting slow, his eyes trailed the body of Brendan as he gained upon him. He recognised him immediately as his neighbour.

Brendan slowed down, and his jog became a quick walk stopping outside of the shelter, pane of glass between them.

"Hello again." Brendan greeted, his own eyes soaked in the young boy he'd spoken to nights earlier, silently thanking the wonders of daylight. "Gotta stop meeting like this"

"Well, let's not be _too_ hasty." Ste smoothed. This was the first time either of them had seen each other properly, every other time they'd had the darkness of the evening or nightclub. Brendan stretched up his arm high to rest on the side, vest inching up slightly revealing the dark hair on his lower stomach. Ste darted his gaze there and Brendan's eyes caught the magic moment.

"I have a job" Ste blurts out quickly, tries to hide his embarrassment.

"That's good" Brendan nodded, lip protruding "Well done"

"I mean, I am going to my job, coffee shop in town. And I dunno why I am tellin ya all of this, sorry"

"I like coffee." Brendan shrugs and plays it down for Ste's sake.

Ste's lips slow into a thin smile "Me too. About the other night, what ya did. That were really amazing. He's violent, me stepdad. So if you hadn't of helped me when you did I might have ended up in hospital."

Brendan walks and sits inside the bus shelter with Ste, lets out a heavy sigh as he does. "Sounds like a right bastard then. It was nothing, anybody would have helped"

"You know that's not true, I'm a stranger to you, kinda. How can I thank you properly?"

"How to thank me. Tell ye what, how about ye make me a coffee some day, at that job of yours."

"Okay, it's a deal. Are you still having trouble sleeping?"

"Up most nights, I do kip it's just broken is all. Haven't seen ye in the garden recently. Thought the night air might have helped"

"It does sometimes. I don't always stand out though, there's the tv or my thoughts to keep me occupied. Might go out tonight though" Ste speaks half nibbling at his bottom lip, the look of his shoes becoming a focal point suddenly.

"I'll bear that in mind"

"Surprised you've the energy to run" Ste says, changing the subject and gesturing to Brendan's attire.

"The running helps me to clear my mind of things and I try to keep healthy"

"Well ya look good. I mean, in good shape" Ste holds his hand up to his eyes, closes them.

"Are ye okay there Steven?"

"Oh, my name is Ste. You must have forgot."

"I didn't forget." Brendan speaks distracted by the bus arriving. He watches it park up, looks at Ste.

"Probably just as well, can't get my foot any more stuck in me gob can I?" Ste giggles nervously.

"See ye tonight then Steven" Brendan says as he jogs past Ste. The bus doors open while Ste watches Brendan leave.

"Oi, you getting on this bus or ogling that fella all morning?" The bus driver barks at Ste, Brendan turns around to jog a few steps backwards, enough time to see Ste blush so red he almost faints.

 _"Cheers for that big mouth"_ Ste says shoving his bus pass to the drivers face. The bus cruises past Brendan just before he steers his body into the local park, enough time for them to exchange smiles. Ste's heartbeat misses as they do.

* * *

When Ste arrives home after his shift the house is empty and there's a steady stream of voices coming from the back garden and the aroma of a BBQ in the air. Ste curious wanders through the house to the back and sighs happy at the sight of Tony in full chef mode, he waves once they notice each other.

"This is a much better idea" Tony says, grin brightening his face. Stood in a daft novelty apron the girls had bought for him last birthday, Tony is at the BBQ turning over the various offers of meat. The smell is mouth watering and lingers with a tinge of burn through the air. Ste offers him a beer from the cooler, they clink the bottles together before taking a swig.

"I agree, especially when the weather is this good. Ya sausage is burnin" Ste points out gesturing to the BBQ. Tony turns them over again.

"You having one? Or there's chicken, burger..."

"It all looks good. I'll have a sausage or two. Don't forget the onions an sauce."

Ste wanders off and bumps into Rae bringing out the salad. "Ste, can ya give Amy a hand? She's got some more sides and some drinks."

"Yeah no worries. Go keep an eye on Tone will ya. Reckon he's gonna incinerate that meat."

"I heard that!" Tony shouts, tongs pointing to Ste in a warning gesture. "I know how to handle my meat thank you"

"I'd keep that to myself if I were you" Ste honks out his laughter.

Tony glances around at everyone who's stopped to snigger at him. Ste winks at Rae before going back inside the house. Amy stands in the kitchen and wipes her brow on her sleeve. Ste's presence has her looking up and blowing out a long breath.

"Who'd have thought a BBQ could be this tasking. Taste this coleslaw Ste, Tony showed me what to do but ya know what's he's like. I dunno if I've done it right." Amy explains, watches with an open mouth while Ste tries some. He smiles once he has.

"It's great Ames, don't worry. Who is coming to this gathering?"

"Dunno, Rae put it online"

"What?! Are ya serious? The world will turn up! Amy!"

"Your face! Ha ha. _I'm joking!_ Just a few people from college, most of them are here."

"Flipping eck. We'd have been kicked out for that."

"Who by? Our lush neighbour?" Amy teases, tongue between her teeth.

"Brendan? Nah he's cool" Ste says, dismissing her words. Amy's face changes, mouth widening like she's heard something juicy.

 _"Brendan?"_ The tray Amy was carrying is quickly discarded. "How do you know his name?"

"I went through his mail, cos ya know, I'm weird like that" Ste replies, chuckles at his friends blank expression. "He told me when I met him other day. Ya know how I have difficulty sleeping?"

Amy nods her head, grabs hold of the tray Ste places in her hands again. Grabs his own and moves with her from the house. "He's same, I went out for some air and Brendan was there too. Got to talking a while ago, just stood out here like"

"Oh, right. Didn't you have it looked at, the sleeping thing."

"Nah. I can sometimes, but it's broken. An when I wake it's difficult to fall asleep again. Usually I'm sat alone, it was nice to have the company. I thought we could invite him over for this." Ste suggests, placing the tray down. "I think he's on his own over there. Plus it would be a good way of introducing ourselves"

"Hm, you already have though. It's okay with me Ste, but we don't know anything about him. Did he look alright?"

"Appearances can be deceptive ya know? I've spoken to him a few times actually and he is cool. Don't need to worry about what he looks like Ames." Ste replies, scolding her slightly. "He um...met Terry too"

"What? Terry was here? Oh no Ste, how's he found you?" Amy says, her voice wobbles and eyes dart around them. Ste steers her to the table with food on it and holds her hand once she's put down the tray.

"He turned up that night you went clubbing. Must have found out at work, I dunno. I came home an he had me up against the front door. Threatened me, the usual. Brendan got rid of him, he was really kind actually"

"Well I am glad he was there then. If Terry even dares to come here again, we'll call the police Ste. I won't have him hurting you again, I saw the pain you went through." Amy moves and hugs Ste tightly.

Amy moves and holds her hand to Ste's shoulder, flicks her eyes up at the house next door.

"Go and ask him over. He can try one of _Tony's burnt offerings_ can't he?" Amy raises her voice, words leaving her mouth with a chuckle.

Ste smiles and turns to look at Tony who is mumbling in the background about being sick of hearing people taking the mick out of his culinary skills. Ste wanders over and takes one of his hot dogs and eats it. "It's amazing Tony. Thanks"

 _"Thank you"_ Tony speaks sarcastically and overly loud at everyone around before they can dare say anything else. Ste eats the rest before he makes his journey round to Brendan's. He knocks and waits. There's no answer after three tries so he goes back to the party and has a few drinks and food with his friends.

* * *

Ste is a little tipsy with the beer flow, he's had a few just be social. He's not the biggest drinker really. After trying a burger the young boy had a full stomach and made his way over to the wooden fence in the middle of the garden. Leaned back against it and soaked up the hot rays of sunshine.

A tap on his shoulder had him surprised and cranking around his neck sharply. The pain he felt hurt leaving him to rub his cool fingers to ease the muscles again. A beautiful brunette woman stood in front of him, wandering through Brendan's garden she's stopped to speak to him. Ste let his mouth loosen a little, mind wondering who she was. He assumed Brendan had lived alone but then he remembers where he has seen her, the other night in the club.

"Hey, sorry to trouble you. I am looking for the man who lives here, Brendan? You haven't seen him at all, have you?"

"Um, no...not since this morning. I knocked earlier actually. Was going to ask him to the BBQ, but he wasn't in then either"

"Oh right" The lady spoke, slightly disappointed as she looked back at the house. "I will have to come back then won't I?"

"Are you his wife?" Ste asked curious. "Just cos...I thought Brendan lived alone"

"Did you now" The lady smiled, eyes trailing down the entirety of Ste leaving him feeling a little awkward. "Hang on a minute, I know you don't I? Weren't you at the club the other day?"

"Yeah, I was. Just said hi an that, I was with my housemates"

The lady suddenly held out her arm, fingers wriggling. "I'm Anne, I'm a friend and colleague of Brendan's. Not his wife, no such luck. I'm completely _not_ his type"

"Aw, that's a shame. Maybe that could change, ya never know" Ste gulped down his beer, eyes still on Anne.

"Oh believe me, it'll never happen. Could you, could you let him know I called round? He usually rings me, he has trouble sleeping."

"Yep, he told me. Somet we have in common, I'm a terrible sleeper too. He's alright though, he went for a jog this morning"

"Of course he did." Anne beamed profusely. "It was nice to meet you..?"

"Ste" Ste replies and shakes Anne's hand again. "Do ya want something to eat? There's plenty left. You're welcome to join us and maybe Brendan will come back soon"

"Thanks love, but I'm gonna get going. Ste, it was nice to meet you. I think it won't be the last time we do though." Anne's winks as she leaves, Ste watches her get into a nice car and drive off. Rae stands next to him and looks in the same direction.

"That his girlfriend?" Rae inquires, sucks her drink through a straw noisily.

"No, she says she's not his type"

"Ah, assumed she was. Who then?"

"A mate and colleague. Seems friendly enough. How much have you had to drink?" Ste turns to his friend, her balance is way off and her giggles give it away.

"Um, one...two...just three I think" Rae ponders and Ste grabs a hold of her arm.

"Come on, lets get some food in ya. Soak up the booze. At least one of us will kip like a baby huh"

* * *

That evening it's raining with the threat of a storm within the charged night sky above. Ste is sat in his bedroom, eyes tilted upwards to watch for any lightning, keeps his chin rested on his upturned palms glaring at the rain lash at the window. He's a little disappointed, Ste was looking forward to having someone to talk to during the early morning hours while he was awake. His long eyelashes blinked gazing out at the sudden flash of lightning that tracked the night sky, the low rumble of thunder that accompanied it giving the window a shudder. It was four miles away, Ste had counted out of curiosity.

The flash had lit up the garden and showed the aftermath of the party they'd had there earlier. It was a mess and needed a good clean up, a bit like the state inside his head, still throbbing from the intake of beer. Ste blew out a bored breath, there were better things to keep his mind occupied. Ste glanced back into his room and spied the blank tv, before getting up and wandering through to the kitchen. Filling the kettle deciding to prepare himself a hot drink Ste turned on the radio lowering the music to a mild tone.

The storm continued it's lightning display outside his window and Ste stood to watch again, arms folding when a slight tapping noise at the front door had him spinning around. Ste's lip inverted, the flesh pushing up behind his teeth he moved to creep slowly along his room and edge around the door. Ste leaned his head out and listened carefully, the radio continued to play out music softly and another tapping, although not as long, vibrated the glass of the front door. Ste's heart beat began to race now as he considered it was Terry back for a visit. Ste chewed his bottom lip some more and double checked the lateness of the hour. Past one in the morning.

Animatedly tip toeing across to the front entrance, Ste peered around to see the door. A huge flash of lightning forked the sky lighting up a figure stood at the door. Ste yelped and covered his mouth, eyes widening. A low chuckle outside had his hands letting go, lowering past his mouth, it didn't sound like Terry. Ste gripped the lock and turned it slowly, jolting open the door his head moved to look out.

"Boo!" Brendan spoke smugly, smile lifting his tashe. Ste's eyes gazed upon the man he saw this morning. The lampposts on the street shone a rewarding orange glow, down the street and into the front of his house allowing Ste to see him and the backdrop of rain falling to the ground.

"Brendan, wow" Ste exclaimed, opening the door wider.

"What?" Brendan asked, smile stretching. He was wearing a short length leather jacket to shield from the rain, dark jeans. His hair and moustache had caught beads of the rain, they sparkled while dripping off. Ste took in all of him without even realising what he was doing.

"Just... Definitely _not_ weird"

"Ok, I'm getting a complex now, what's with the weird?"

"Nothing." Ste shook his head, he was aware he was staring, it was totally obvious, but he was compelled to keep Brendan's gaze. Amazing calbalt blue, piercing.

"It's raining" Ste spoke again, clearly distracted.

"No kidding." Brendan laughed. "Ye never came out so...thought I'd knock"

"It's raining" Ste repeated himself, looking at the facial hair Brendan had, Ste wondered if it was the soft kind, or maybe it was harsh bristles. He couldn't tell from just looking. When his eyes travelled upwards again, Brendan had his eyebrows raised knowingly.

"Steven, are ye gonna stare all night? I'd rather be comfy and dry if ye are"

"You wanna come in?" Ste asked absently, then blinked back into the room. He was going crazy. The temperature soared thanks to the hot summer night.

"You'll have to invite me first, vampire" Brendan pressed his lips closed, nod of the head. Watched Ste angle his head to one side, eyes slanting.

"You're kidding"

"Might be, then again ye never know who lives next door, do ye?"

"You're invited..." Ste speaks cautiously, moves to let Brendan walk in. "Show me your teeth"

Brendan turns, beams a full set of teeth leaving Ste to lean in closer. Brendan captures the smell of him, his beautiful blue eyes. It leaves his breath shallow and lips relaxing again. "Hmm, no sharp ones. I have garlic...a friendly warning"

"I like garlic" Brendan holds his hands up "Fair enough. Close the door then, ye don't live in a barn"

Ste closes the door and shows Brendan into the lounge. "It's not much, we're still unpacking. Can I get you a drink?"

"A bloody Mary please"

Ste wanders into the kitchen then stops short. "Okay wise ass, what do you want to drink? I'm making a hot chocolate"

"Go on then, I'll live a little, thanks" Brendan sits down and lays his arms on the back of the sofa, Ste fetches two mugs of hot chocolate through and sits opposite on a chair.

"That bus driver this morning, weren't talking about you. Just so ya know that"

"Oh, that's, yeah. Good to clear that up. So the fact ye blushed when I turned around, that was not ye looking right at me, no?"

"No. You had a visitor earlier" Ste cleared his throat and sips his drink, looks at Brendan doing the same.

"Who was that then?"

"Anne? Yeah, she stopped by and we got talking. Says she was concerned ya never called her last night as normal"

"Ah. Yes. I do call her usually, on account of always being awake. She's a good friend, likes to check up on me when I disappear." Brendan places his cup on the coffee table in front of him.

"Good having friends like that. Bet me taking up your time other night kept you from calling her too"

"Made a change didn't it? Look at us now, I ain't done this in..." Brendan pauses to think. He doesn't think he's ever done this before, not exactly the most talkative man.

"Yeah, me too. Anne seems really nice too. Why can't ya sleep?"

Brendan raises his brows, eyes to the floor. "Long story, I doubt you'll be interested"

"They say strangers are the best to talk too, an I have got all night" Ste grinned. "Unless it's private."

"I have nightmares, reoccurring ones. They wake me up and to be fair, no one wants that do they. So I'd rather stay awake"

"I'm sorry to hear that. I shouldn't pry really" Ste drank a swig of his hot chocolate, flickered his eyes up to Brendan who himself was now staring. Ste pulled the cup from his mouth slowly, watched the older man lick his lips. "Maybe if you had company at night. That would help you? Waking up alone, well it'll be scary after that won't it?"

"Been on my own a while now. Well, the odd bit of fun, I ain't a monk. Besides, too much baggage isn't it? Who's gonna want to lie next to someone who has disruptive sleep. May as well just stay awake"

"Doctors?"

"Done that, they just chuck meds at ye and think it's a solution. Ye been to the doctors Steven?"

"No, I just thought it would pass I guess. I dunno what keeps me restless. If it's dreams then I never remember" Ste shrugs as he explains, eyes flicking up to the stranger sat on his sofa. He wasn't sure how he could be at such ease with someone he'd just met. Inviting him into his home, having a conversation like they'd known each other years. It was an odd feeling, but comfortable nevertheless.

"You're Irish. I like the accent"

Brendan looked back at Ste. "Yeah, Dublin. I've a family there, kids, ex wife"

Ste spluttered on his drink, wiping the remnants from his mouth. He coughed awkwardly.  
"Damn it" Ste cursed, placing the drink away from him.

"Forgot where your mouth was?" Brendan rolled his head, pondering the young boy in front of him. "You're surprised I'm married aren't ye"

"Thought you said ex?" Ste corrected, brushed down his wet clothes. "Not really, Anne she looks good ya know. I'm sure you two will be happy together. I mean she denied it but, yeah obvious"

"She is my ex, the wife? And as for Anne...well there's no need to worry on that score"

"Why would I worry?"

"Hm" Brendan shrugged, his head shaking. His eyes flicked up to Ste who looked a little fidgety. " I married my wife, Eileen, but I fancied the priest more if truth be told"

"Blimey, did ya?" Ste's eyes moved quickly to Brendan then. The older man sighed relieved, Ste seemingly happy at the revelation. He'd never told a living soul the truth about his wedding day. How he'd turned up for his children, for his fiancée and the vile father he had perched behind his shoulder when he'd dared to eye back at the exit. It seemed to stretch further away the longer he'd looked. The look his father gave him still instilled the same fear now when thinking about it as it did that day.

"Brendan, are you alright?" Ste's voice smoothed like a sweet honey, despite his broad Mancunian accent. Brendan endeared to his words, his company and his acceptance.

"I'm fine Steven. Just reopening old wounds is all"

"So...if ya wasn't into marrying her, why not tell her?"

"I had a duty as a father. Besides, I wasn't entirely faithful"

"Ah. I bet she weren't pleased about that then. Threw ya backside out I bet"

"Something like that yeah." Brendan reached for his drink again, mouth all dry and scratchy. "A man can't help his urges, ye should know" Brendan glared up at Ste through hooded eyelids, watched him squirm on the spot.

"Dunno what ya mean"

"I've seen ye look at me, it's...obvious"

"You look at me an all! With them, mysterious eyes, glued to me they are" Ste defended quickly, mostly because of the embarrassment, and with that, caught the bait. Ste watched Brendan smirk, it was far too rewarding having the confirmation he'd needed. The pleasure it had produced contagious enough to catch, Ste hated his involuntary reactions but liked they now both shared the same thoughts.

Keeping their eyes tethered to one another, neither one backed down for many moments. In the end it was Ste who grinned first, accompanied by a wonderful flourishing Brendan could easily get used too. Brendan edged back into the cushioned sofa and laid back his head.

"My nightmares come from my childhood. Growing up in Ireland with my Da. He ran a pub, it was old and decrepit, a bit like how he is now." Brendan scoffed, his eyes looked full of anger as he reminised. Ste swallowed slowly. "Smokey, so bad it left a continuous sheen of it in the air"

"Against the law that is" Ste interrupted. "Not allowed to smoke in public places are ya?"

"Not now maybe. But back then ye could. I hated the smell of cigars, it's the one thing that ails me"

"Was you a lot younger then?" Ste asks, he's leaned forward on his knees now, eyes full of interest.

"A teenager, in the pub at least. It gave me a sense of achievement, when he gave me a job there." Brendan played idly with his finger nails. "Turns out it was another way to berate me"

Ste sat there and watched Brendan struggle with his vivid memories, a time passed by years ago that brought a lot of pain for him. Ste himself knowing all too well how growing up as a child isn't always so innocent and fun. Sometimes you have to grow up a lot quicker than you're meant too. Brendan didn't say anything more so Ste thought of his own youth.

"When I were a kid, my mam married Terry. He beat me up everyday of my life. I still have the bruises, perhaps not above my skin. Below it though, they're there. Made me believe I deserved it too"

"Ye never deserved that Steven. No child does."

"Got away finally, wanted to better myself. I met them lot at school" Ste points to the ceiling. "My friends, they know about it. We all made a pact to study at college and make ourselves better." Ste reveals, the proudness he radiates warms Brendan, encourages him to smile. Ste captures it and smiles back.

"My Da beat me too, I've lost count of the bruises, but my nightmares remind me. Why I don't like to sleep"

Ste nibbles his bottom lip, hesitates initially before striding across to the sofa and sitting on it with Brendan. "An he's still alive too"

"Hmm" Brendan nods, brings his body around to angle with Ste. He's sat up and crossed his legs again, fiddles with his fingers. "He's in Ireland though. I escaped and came here"

"I'm glad ya did"

"Are ye?"

"Yeah, I am. It's crap init? What did we do wrong, why us?"

"I stopped asking questions like that long ago. Your step dad, why did he seek ye out again?"

"Money. It's always about the money. They both drink"

"And ye give it to him, don't ye?"

Ste nods bowing his head. "Sometimes. He wanted money for me mam. I bet ya think I'm mad to bother, especially as she probs never sees any of it. She stood by...watched him for years. I used to ask her why, why she wouldn't help me. Think it was half because she was scared he'd turn on her too" Ste wipes the sudden tear from his cheek and instantly feels ashamed by it.

Another hand fleets it's way across his cheek, and Ste flicks his dark wet matted lashes up. Brendan is leant across now, thumb brushing the soft bronzed skin Ste has, his eyes dart freely with Ste's who brings up his own hand but the older man moves his away. Shuffles straight and looks like he's preparing to leave.

"You going?"

"Yeah, outstayed my welcome enough so"

Ste stands as Brendan does, walks him to the door and the older man waits around, looks at the rain still pouring down outside. Ste heaves a long sigh, arms wrapping around his chest. He gazes up at Brendan who looks down at him, watches his tongue move out its tip.

"Can I see you again?" Ste asks casually, bites against his lip. Brendan is silent with his thoughts."I mean if you want, doesn't matter. Whatever"

"Come to mine, tomorrow night?"

"Your house?"

"Yeah, not far to travel" Brendan smiles, gestures to the weather. "Best make a dash for it"

"Right, tomorrow then"


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you for your lovely reviews for this story. xx

* * *

The Boy Next Door

Part 2

Ste closed the front door with a soft push, mind racing as fast as the sound of his heart against his chest. He couldn't comprehend the last hours he'd spent with Brendan and how they'd just sat together talking as if it were something they'd always done. He'd waited, Ste had listened to the quick steps of Brendan rushing up the path and back up his own to avoid the torrential downpour. The noise of his door closing. There was something exciting about them being this close with only a wall dividing them, and Ste felt he could now hear everything, each sound seeming to echo more now.

Ste licked his dry lips and proceeded to switch off the lights in the main rooms of the house before moving through to his room. Drawing the curtains to, Ste got into bed and bunched up the covers under his chin. He looked around his new bedroom again, it was a lot different to his childhood room. They'd had single glazed windows in his house that always froze over during the long winter months and kept him cold. He'd do this then, shelter under the duvet. Wrap himself up in it like a cocoon during those nights and shivered until he'd fallen sleep. They'd not always money to keep the energy going in the house so the fires barely got switched on. Ste drags back the sheets now and feels the heat from the radiators prickle against his skin releasing a gentle hum from his lips.

The light fitting on the ceiling cast an elongated dark shadow from it with his bedside lamp lit up, there was an old style mirror hung on the wall at the back and a solid pine wardrobe in the corner of the room. Ste traveled his eyes around then lay his head to one side, stared at his phone and took it in his hand. The time said 2:43am. He huffed a long breath, bouncing himself on his back and closed his eyes. Usually an old memory would resurface now, a time from his childhood he rewrote in his imagination. Now there was something else dominating his mind, Ste smiles with thoughts of Brendan.

* * *

Rae wakes Ste up late morning. Bouncing on the edge of his bed on her knees, the mattress dipped and springs recoiled. Ste lifted his head up sharply, half lidded eyes looking at her unamused. Ste grumbled placing his head back heavy on the pillow.

"Rae...I'm tired" Ste yawned loudly, rubbed the pesky sleep from his closed eyes.

"Sorry, but come _onnn_. Haven't seen you in ages, we could go shopping like we used to. You're not working today are ya" Rae speaks excited, once again shifting the springs in the mattress. She moved off the bed and drew the curtains letting in the beautiful sunshine. Ste let out a weary sigh, brought up his arm to cover his eyes from the bright light.

"Okay, I will agree if ya quit boundin' around me room all day" Ste twisted and stretched his arms up above his head, his bones cracked blissfully. Rae stood quietly by the window and gazed out of it. "What ya looking at?"

"Just our neighbour, he's going out somewhere" Rae replies, the noise of Ste suddenly shifting and jumping out of bed alerts her to gaze back at him. He looks then himself. Ste tries to avoid Rae's curiosity, moving to get some jogging bottoms on.

"What were that all about? You have never gotten out of bed so quick in your life!" Rae laughs watching Ste, she looks back out of the window.

"No, I had cramp in me leg. Had to shake it out quick so that's why I moved fast." Ste replies unconvincingly, doesn't look back at his friend who sports a fair old smile now. "Do you know if anyone's gonna be in later tonight? Ste continues.

"Um, well me an Amy will be out for a meal, gonna ask ya to come along"

"Can't, not tonight. Were gonna do some baking ya see. Could do with the kitchen to myself" Ste gazed up sheepishly at his friend. "Just for an hour or two"

"Hm. Okay, I'll suggest to Amy we take Tony along tonight. You're acting pretty elusive Ste, but I think you're not ready to divulge why, are ya?"

"No, an I have my reason's. Just trust me an I will tell you soon, promise. Come on, let me have a shower an that and I'll treat us to a coffee in town"

* * *

After getting the kitchen to himself a while before he went round to Brendan's house, Ste left his home and traveled the short distance to next door. Ste stills with his hand up to the door, hesitates before he knocks. Looks around at the quiet street they live on, darkness falling around him, it's around eleven o clock. They'd arranged for him to come around tonight, and now he's stood outside of Brendan's house his nerves become his enemy and weaken his knees.

Ste stands taller and gains composure, knocks pathetically at first, no one would have heard it. Except Brendan that is, the man who'd been waiting for Ste to turn up. He heard it and opened the door. His smile had begun to please Ste the more he saw it, the way it brightened his face, lifted his moustache and presented those hidden lips fully. Ste mirrored his happiness and felt at ease walking in to Brendan's home.

"I'm too early, aren't I? Hope it's okay - I can leave if not...or" Ste babbles with his nerves, the fact he's in new surroundings and with a man he happens to like.

"Yes, probably best stand outside for another, half hour" Brendan admitted taking a quick glance at his watch, his mouth held relaxed upon engaging Ste's eyes. They were wide and shiny in the bask of the street lamps leaving Brendan completely at mercy with them.

"Ya serious?" Ste exclaims, voice surprised as he drops his jaw.

"Like I'm gonna make ye stand outside Steven. I was ready hours ago, so yeah it's okay" Brendan winks and relaxes Ste instantly. He chuckles on his breathing and gestures to the inside.

"Cool place." Ste spoke impressed twisting his body around to look everywhere. Brendan closed the door and showed him through to the lounge. Ste passed him a food box and nosed around the modern looking room.

"Thanks. So what's in here?" Brendan intrigued looks at the container.

"Just some cookies. I have a budding chef at home, Tony, he teaches me stuff sometimes."

"Ye made these?" Brendan asks, eyebrows raised in question.

"Yeah, not the surprise of the century though right. You like cookies don't you?"

"I love all food Steven. It's the way to my heart"

"I'll make a note of that then" Ste speaks without much thought, glances at Brendan who's looking mischievous suddenly.

"Will ye now"

"Couldn't hurt" Ste simpered as he shrugged and sat down on the sofa. The large comfortable cushions swallows up his body and he melts right into it. Ste smoothed the fabric out with his flat palms. "Could get used to this"

"Reckon I might too" Brendan sighs watching Ste making himself at home, places the box on the table. "Want milk with your cookies?"

"Ha, nah, I'll have a cuppa if you're making one"

"Usually crack open the whiskey at this time" Brendan says, moves into the kitchen and Ste jumps up to follow, finds the middle counter a good place to lean down against, his top rides up and shows off his lower back. Brendan can't help but admire the soft golden tone of his skin. "Comfy there?"

"Yep. So can you cook then? Only I was curious like, as ya on your own"

"There's this brilliant invention that I use" Brendan informs Ste, puts the kettle on. With his back to him, Ste let's his eyes wander the full round of Brendan's posterior.

"Besides size too small suit trousers?" Ste ponders while Brendan turns his head back slowly, looks at Ste with a blank expression. "Let me guess, microwave"

"Takeaway" Brendan turns back, beam on his face. "Brew?"

"Tea, one sugar ta"

"Duly noted. I have three in mine" Brendan places Ste's drink on the side. "Are ye feeling better from yesterday?"

"Yeah, not bad. It was good to talk a little about it, I haven't in a long time. It does help though"

"I agree it does" Brendan leads them through the house and gestures to the sofa.

"Ya don't mind if I..?" Ste toes off his shoes so he can sit crossed legged. They sit across from each other as Ste offers the box of cookies to Brendan who takes one. Ste blows cool air over his tea and takes a sip, watches as the older man carefully takes a bite and savours it. Ste's eyes are like the ocean staring back at him.

"What's the verdict then?"

"They taste like...heaven. Ye really make them?"

Ste grins smugly. "Yep. Glad ya like em"

"Where does your step dad live?" Brendan asks, leaving Ste whipping his gaze up fast.

"Why ya wanna know that?"

Brendan shrugs. "Just seems like he's gotten away with far too much that's all"

"Where does your dad live?" Ste asks with a miffed tone, it has Brendan left feeling put in his place and regretful for asking.

Brendan nods slowly "Okay, fine."

Ste releases a heavy sigh and mulls over his thoughts. "Sorry, it's just that Terry winds me up. It's ridiculous what I let him get away with. He comes into my work sometimes, says the money is for me mam cause he knows I'll do it for her. Thought once I'd left home things would be better, but seeing Terry the other night here shows me he'll never leave me alone"

"Why don't ye do something about it then? Seems to me he needs putting in his place, but by ye. I could sort him out again but he knows he can click his fingers now. Been going on too long"

"How can ya make it sound that easy though?" Ste fidgets with his hands. "Your dad did bad things too, he got away with it. Terry is just the same"

"It's not the same. That's...nowhere near the same. And I chose to walk away rather than face my demons. My father is Seamus Brady, no one can stand up to him" Brendan shakes his head pathetically, the amount of times he'd rehearsed it, standing up to his father had wasted umpteen hours of his life. If it could only be that simple. Brendan can feel the gaze of Ste's eyes upon him, they're innocent and curious. Soft when Brendan meets them.

"You only think that because it's your dad init? I'm the same with Terry, they leave that fear they put in ya when you're young. So it's like always there. But when they're faced with someone else, someone new it's them who get the fear. Not knowing what to expect"

"And you're the boy for the job are ye? Think ye can face my father? Can't even face your own can ye?" Brendan drawls, but surprisingly Ste doesn't let it faze him.

"I were just saying Brendan. Look how Terry reacted to you the other night. I saw his face change, like I'd never seen before. Moments earlier he was hittin' me cos it was normal, safe for him knowing I'd just take it. Then you turn it around and that's dangerous to the likes of him."

"Steven, I didn't know he'd hit ye" Brendan places his drink on the side. "He won't do that again, ever."

Ste gazes up through his half lidded eyes, gulp in his throat. "I'm not just a boy either."

"That's told me. Go on, how old are ye then?

"I'm Twenty"

"Twenty. I remember when I was that age."

"Musta been ages ago, back when the dinosaurs became extinct" Ste huffs, grabs his drink again and sulks. Brendan watches him do so for many moments, half amused by his protruding lip and sunken eyes.

"Nobody ever teach ye respect?"

"Nobody ever teach you _tact?"_ Ste bites back, his eyes bore straight into Brendan's.

Even though Brendan humoured Ste, there would never be a time, he thought, that he could ever have the last word with Ste. He'd certainly gain enjoyment trying.

"Leave your manners outside did ye?"

"For me elders? Yeah you've a point there, best go find em"

"Answer for everything, spirited... and it's not your youth?"

"I'm not sticking around for this, taking the mick outta me" Ste grumbles, hoisting himself off the sofa. Leaves Brendan slightly taken aback but Ste doesn't get far walking over to the other side of the room by a bookshelf. There are numerous photos placed there and he stops to look at them. Brendan eventually wanders over to join Ste, standing just beside him.

"More like, you're miffed because ye can't get the last word" Brendan lowers his voice, bends down to Ste's ear. "Met your match in me"

Ste turns to his side and gazes up into Brendan's eyes, licks his lips and catches Brendan watching. Ste smirks.

"At least I can control myself around you" Ste turns back and looks down at the photo in his hand of Brendan and a young girl stood with him on the beach.

"I wasn't takin' the mick. I only meant ye wont take any crap off anyone. Including me so it seems. Why can't ye do the same with Terrance, reckon he'd be put firmly in his place"

"Probably because it never gets me anywhere. He frightened me as a kid you know, that doesn't just leave ya Brendan"

"No, it doesn't. I just believe you're a lot stronger than ye think ye are" Brendan holds his hand to Ste's shoulder but the boy is still feeling antsy.

"This was a bad idea coming here, I'm gonna go" Ste places the photo frame into Brendan's hand.

"What do ye mean, hey don't go. I'd been looking forward to your company" Brendan says, the younger boy stops and turns around, gazes up at him.

"Yeah and me." Ste sighs, slight nervous laugh escaping from his mouth. "I guess I'm a bit mouthy sometimes"

Brendan runs his thumb over the lower part of Ste's mouth, just below his full lip. It dragged a little, Ste's lips parting enough to breathe warmth over Brendan's wrist. "I like mouthy"

Ste scoffs bowing his head, lip subtle tugging upwards with his smirk. "So, who's the girl in the photo?"

"That would be my sister Cheryl. She lives in Dublin, likes to be near my Da. We're quite the opposite as in she had a completely different upbringing to me" Brendan recollects, looks at the photo frame in his hand. "This was taken on the beach near to where we lived"

"You look happy here. Do you still see her?"

"I haven't been home in such a long time. When I left, looking back wasn't part of the plan" Brendan explains, his eyes flicks up to an open mouthed Ste. "Well, we speak on the phone so...I'm not too bad"

Ste smiles, turns to look at the other frames of photo's and notices something else. "What about this, degree in English?"

Brendan lifts the frame, certificate encased inside it.

"Yeah, I'm a teacher." Brendan confessed reading quietly to himself.

"Oi I thought ya weren't taking the mick anymore!" Ste shoved Brendan playfully in the arm, gasp in his throat.

"What?!" Brendan says with forced laughter

"I'm not taking the mick, ye ain't the only one who studied" Brendan defends himself quickly. Ste's still not convinced though. "Alright so yeah, it wasn't planned, but it was anything to stop working with my Da. This, this he wasn't happy about, wanted his son to help him run the business, why I pursued anything but"

"So, you studied to piss your father off? I can think of less boring things to do"

Brendan chuckles. "It kept me busy, and out of the way. Like ye do now I attended college and I was good at English and gained enough qualifications to be anything I wanted

"Anything?" Ste honked out his laugh "Teaching though, means ya dead clever that does. I wouldn't last five minutes"

"Hang on a minute, what about cooking? Ye could show me more than I'll ever know"

"Oh yeah. Got a point there. So...you became a teacher in spite of your dad. Do you regret it now?"

"No, it's cool. I get to travel as a supply teacher. I go where I'm sent, been to many different schools and academies. A few in Ireland until this one time I was offered a placement at a school in England and I jumped at the chance, literally on a ferry, to get as far away as possible. Got myself a house here and...never looked back. Truth is, I haven't been home in years"

"Supply teachers. I remember those at school, they were cool and occasionally fit too" Ste recollects, looks at Brendan who dances his brows.

"Well it's a tough job, but somebody's gotta do it. Ye still are surprised though, doesn't it sound feasible to ye? It's the tache, isn't it. Beard?"

"That in't a beard"

"Why isn't it?"

Ste holds his palm to Brendan's face, uses his finger tips to drag the rough growing hair. "Still stubbly ain't ya. Beard would be softer an you'd be hairier"

"Beard expert now are ye? It's not fully grown yet. Tell ye what, I'll let ye test it out again when it is"

Ste gawps a moment at Brendan, observes his arms now tightening around his chest. Ste breaks out into a short snigger. "You don't look like a teacher."

"What do I look like to ye then? Careful mind."

"Dunno, in your suit you could pass for a businessman" Ste walks back over to the sofa and feels satisfied enough to stay. Sits back and thinks carefully, grips one of the cookies in his hand to nibble on. "Was you dead strict with ya kids as a teacher then?"

"No, I didn't really get chance to be in their lives. My biggest regret. I'm not a great father" Brendan admits with a heavy sigh as he joins Ste once again on the sofa.

"I don't believe that, you being a bad dad." Ste shook his head at Brendan. "I know bad uns, and that's not you."

The briefest smile painted the older man's lips then, he didn't look up from his hands though. The shame he felt weighted him. It had been a long time since anybody had believed in him let alone spoke it out loud.

"I start back at college soon, that's helped loads the study an that. Making myself better, determined I am"

"Good, I'm glad because you'll do well having that attitude." Brendan leans back against the couch. "College and studying, working. That's gonna keep ye busy."

"This will be my second year, I'm just a part time student doing a couple of years to get some grades behind me. I wanna keep working my shifts at the coffee shop and besides, can't study all the time. I'll miss our chats when term starts." Ste says, ponders his words thoughtfully.

"Perhaps I could help your study, won't tell if ye don't"

"I'm not the best at English, so would be good having all the answers" Ste grins deliciously.

"Hey, I ain't helpin ye cheat"

"AW. You'll be too busy anyhow Brendan" Ste dismisses his idea with a shrug, finishes off his tea.

"I'll make time for ye" Brendan licks his lips, eyes darting with Ste's. "Is that okay?"

"Yeah, I'd like that"

"Good"

"So, you said your thoughts were elsewhere when ya married" Ste says curiously. "I'm assuming it was a male priest that lured ya mind"

Brendan breathes his laugh encouraging Ste to smile "Perceptive, but I didn't have it away with the priest. I did get caught though, with the wife's cousin, Macca. I had to leave when she found me with him"

"Was he important to you?"

"No, I was an idiot. I didn't think about the bigger picture, my kids, Eileen"

"We all make mistakes Brendan. It's how we make up for them that matters" Ste looks up at the time and sighs. "Right, it's pretty late so...up early for work" Ste pointed to the door getting up. Brendan stood with him and they walked to the front door.

"Thanks for the cookies"

"That's okay, I'd..." Ste's words break off, eyes swimming in Brendan's. There was an attraction between them neither could deny but Ste was enjoying himself too much to complicate things. "Um, best be off"

"Want me to walk ye home?" Brendan asks, angles his head to one side and darts his gaze to Ste's lips.

"Brendan, I live next door"

"And?"

Ste smirks head bowing. "That's...thanks, but I'm good. See you again?"

"Ye can bet on it

* * *

Ste's day's became weeks as the hot summer passed quickly, spending more and more of his restless nights in the company of Brendan. The end of July came around all too soon. Rubbing his eyes into focus Ste got up early one morning and traveled to his job, worked his shift at the coffee shop. The whole day it's there in the back of his mind, the distraction Brendan caused him. Nothing has dominated his mind so much or as often that hadn't been with a sadness or regret. Mind swimming, Ste had used to want to forget everything in his head. Now though, the bad had been replaced by the good, excitement, and an accompanying flutter within his tummy that made the sick feeling worth it.

There had been a steady stream of customers today, and that greatly hastened the day for Ste and his colleagues. The rain from the night before had lingered a lot longer than he'd hoped and on his break Ste had made a drink for himself and sat down by the window on his own. The pavement outside drenched, shone with puddles doted around. Kids that passed by jumped in them and splashed the water around their ankles annoying the parents that held tight to their hands. Ste noticed the hidden smiles they'd had though, remembering from when they themselves had done the same. Ste rested his jaw on an upturned palm to watch, thought about the times he'd been in that same place, left behind his mum to walk alone. God forbid he'd ever try and splash in those puddles. It had worsened when she'd got married.

 _"Terry...?"_ Ste's eyes widened, body siting up quick and tall. It had been a few weeks since he'd last seen him and there had been a point where Ste, becoming complacent, thought Terry wouldn't have dared come back again. Bold in his motives, the weathered older man stood in front of him in the rain just staring through the glass pane window. His eyes dark with plans of revenge. Ste swallowed feeling vulnerable, darting his eyes back to his co workers busy with customers. Terry turned and walked in the door, painful in his calm composure settling at the table Ste was at. His hand reaching across the wood and folding against Ste's so tightly he whimpered at the pain, face wrinkling while his eyes darted from his hand to Terry.

"Where is he?"

"Wh...who?" Ste asked, his voice crumbling. "Get _off_ me..."

"Your dirty boyfriend. The one who thought he could humiliate me" Terry drawls leaning over the table towards Ste. "Turns out he's as thick as pig shit. Just made things worse for you, hasn't he?"

Ste shook his head. "He's not...I said get off me!" Ste angered and dragged his hand free. The pain throbbing through his fingers left him rubbing the flesh. "I could call the police you know, tell em how you won't ever leave me alone"

"You won't do that though. It's your mother I am here for. She's unwell Ste. Now...I know you ain't gonna want her suffering"

"My mam only suffers because of you. Maybe if you took the hint and crawled back from where ya came from she'd get some peace" Ste seethes, stands up with his hands down on the table.

"You actually believe Pauline cares about you. It's laughable, where's your bodyguard now eh?"

"He ain't my bodyguard right. He's my friend"

"Friend?!, he'll have felt _sorry_ for ya. Realised what a pathetic excuse you are!" Terry chuckles to himself and settles back with the menu. "I'll have my usual. Run along now, do your job. Don't forget my tip while you're there"

"The tips are for the _staff!"_ Ste shakes his head. Terry grabs Ste's wrist.

"I'll let that go because you're upset about Pauline. Don't send me back to her pissed off, alright"

"You are scum, ya know that?" Ste leans down to Terry's ear. Reaches behind to another table gripping hold of a half consumed cup of coffee. "It's not gonna work on me any more. This is the last time you ever come in here and the last I will ever give you anything"

"You ain't in any position to make..." Terry splutters as cold coffee is poured over his head, he stands up fast, anger on his face.

"That's your _tip_. I left home for a reason, because I have friends who care about me. And yeah, I kept giving in for me mam but as you so perfectly put, she don't care about me. I never want to see you again, or me mam. She made her choice" Ste's breathing falters, eyes scanning the shop and the customers staring.

"I think you should leave sir" Ste flicks his eyes up at his manager as she encourages Terry to leave. "And don't come back"

"He assaulted me! You all saw it!" Terry angers. "I want compensation!"

"Nobody saw anything, isn't that right?" The people in the shop all turn away and continue their conversations. Ste's colleagues serve and chatter among them all. Each one a regular and each one supporting him. Ste sighs with relief and takes a last look at his step father before he leaves disgruntled. His manager walks over to him and hugs Ste closely.

"I am sorry. I just...I had to do something cause he was never gonna stop was he? What if I just made things worse..."

"Ste listen to me, it's okay. I have been waiting for this day for so long Ste. I hated the way he could just come in here and take money from you like that. He's barred forever now. And you, should take the rest of the day off."

"What? Why?" Ste sniffs, smile across his face crooked with emotion.

"You've been smiling all day, every day distracted. No bloody use to me" She says jokingly, smiles softly with her chuckles. They walk to a table to sit down at. "Then here you are standing up to that scumbag. There has got to be a reason for the change in you"

"Yeah" Ste nods. "There is. I moved in next door to the reason. He's...well I can't get him out of my mind. And ya gotta keep a hold of that, what makes you smile"

"Yes you do. Right, call a cab. It's on me, go home. Maybe one day I will get to thank this man personally. I'll see you tomorrow, bright and early" She says with a wink. Ste sucks in a deep breath, releasing it heavy and with a contented smile.

Ste's taxi pulls up at his house, and just as it does Brendan's car parks into his driveway. Ste cannot contain himself, pays the driver and has a spring in his step standing behind Brendan's car. The older man get's out and stops to look Ste over, his eyes wander and it's like they always do. Ste shakes his head at Brendan laughing to himself.

"What ye up to, loitering outside my house now is it?" Brendan walks close to Ste, towers above his smaller body. Brendan squints his eyes intrigued. "Ye look...different"

"I am different. And it's because of you"

"Me?" Brendan points to himself. "How?"

"Today I stood up to Terry. I can't believe it either but he came in the coffee shop again an I..."

"Did he hurt ye?" Brendan asked, voice full of concern.

"Doesn't matter." Ste say's dismissively, Brendan holds his thumb to Ste's chin tilts him up towards him.

"It matters to me if he hurt ye"

"He didn't. It was just the usual thing, askin' for money. So, I told im right, I said he couldn't keep demanding money. I chucked coffee over his head! Actually, that coulda backfired... Brendan, you gave me the courage to stand up to him"

"Hey, that's not because of me, it's because of ye" Brendan smiles holding onto Ste's shoulders "I told ye, you're a lot stronger than ye think"

"I never thought I could do that though. An I just wanted to thank you"

"Well if ye insist" Brendan cocks his head, lowering closer to Ste. "So, just how will ye be thanking me this time?"

Ste swallows before he's up on his tip toes and laying cool lips on Brendan's cheek. It's a quick peck but it says everything he needs too. "I'll see ya later, okay?"

"Yeah" Brendan says, his surprise leaving him in a daze as his eyes follow Ste up the path and through his front door.

* * *

August

Ste stretched his body tall, fingers reaching the ceiling once he'd got out of bed. Moving to have a quick shower and a brush of his teeth he skipped down the stairs and halted with a skid at the bottom. There, forming a kind of barricade were his friends. All huddled together and looking at Ste quizzically.

Ste stepped into the room cautiously darting his eyes to each of them individually. "Morning, you're all wide awake I see"

"Yes we are" Tony agreed with a nod, looked at Rae then Amy then Ste. "You got something to tell us?"

" _Um_...no" Ste shook his head, parted his friends to walk through to the kitchen. "I'm famished, what's for breakie?"

"Cookies" Amy chirruped in, sly smile across her face.

 _"Cookies..."_ Ste replied, eyes closing shut. He grit his teeth before removing himself from the fridge.

"Hm, yeah." Rae grinned, walking with a sway over to Ste, her eyes had the kind of glint in them that foretold his guilt. He stood tall and remembered plausible deniability actually exists for moments like these.

"Brrrrendan called round this morning" Amy caved first, almost combusting, her cheeks reddened.

"Who?" Ste replied, hard of hearing this morning naturally. The younger boy played down the entourage of butterflies in his stomach hearing someone else say his name.

"Brendan" Tony this time. They were all behind him, trapped like an animal Ste composed himself turning to face them.

"He's...our neighbour"

"We know that! No more sneakin around mister" Rae took one arm and Amy took the other. Tony kept up the rear as they steered him to the sofa of interrogation. Ste glowed with his smiling. Amy perched herself on the coffee table in front of Ste.

"He called round this morning. Brought back your cookie box. Said to thank you _personally_ for making them"

"See, he's my best student. Ste will go far in the world of culinary expertise" Tony beamed proudly. "An I taught him that cookie recipe, it never fails"

"Thanks Tone" Ste rolls his eyes. "Must of left the box at his house...maybe" Ste nibbled the corner of his mouth. Caught out big time.

"I told Ames, we started talking one night and that turned into each night and we just never stopped"

"So that's where you've been going this whole time? I knew you were hiding something" Ray says, links onto Ste's arm. "He's okay too"

"Thought he was weird?" Ste looked straight at Rae who shrugged in reply.

"Fair enough, I was hasty. He seems very nice, pleasant. Bet he didn't bank on us lot when he knocked at the door"

"Yeah I bet" Ste agreed, suddenly feeling gutted he'd not seen Brendan this morning now. "When did Brendan come round?"

"Not long, about half hour a go. Said he was going into town or something." Amy replied and wandered into the kitchen. Ste stood up and moved to grab his thin blue jacket.

"Did he. Right, I'm off to do my shift Ames"

"Thought that wasn't till later, don't you have an afternoon shift today?" Amy said, she finished off her toast with a lick of her fingers.

Ste glanced back at the front door and slowly edged further towards it. "I just fancied a wander round town first. Fresh air and that."

"Fresh air huh?" Amy grins at Ste. Still finds it highly amusing how he thinks she cannot read his mind. Amy moves then and wraps her arms around Ste's neck, squeezes him tightly. Ste hugs her back.

"What's this for?" Ste asks, he smiles at his friend when they part again.

"Just, good to see you happy"

Ste exchanged a smile with Amy as he left the house and moved out of the door into the bright sunny morning. Ste glanced over to the house as he zipped up his thin jacket, wandered down the pathway to look, carried on until he reached the driveway. Brendan's car was gone though, the younger boy sighed disappointed, hands sliding into his pockets Ste continued to walk to the bus stop down the road.

"This gotta stop happening, else people will talk" Ste hitched a breath surprised and turned to the side. Brendan parked up and leaned across the passenger side.

"What are ye doing up, thought you'd need some sleep after last night. Ye stayed pretty late again"

"Well, we found a lot to talk about" Ste angled on his folded arms against the open window, gazed into the car. "I've a shift at the coffee shop later today. Gotta earn some money somehow right?"

"I still have to visit this coffee shop of yours one day."

"I like that idea. Ya might even get a discount if you're lucky. This is a nice car"

"Yeah, I like it. Where are ye off to?"

"Town before my shift starts. I was just about to catch the bus"

Brendan licked his lips, eyes trailing Ste's face. "Forget the bus, get in, I'll give ye a lift"

"Serious?" Ste replied, his face brightening.

"Sure, I am going there myself, if ye want to tag along..." Brendan didn't get to finish his words, Ste opened the car and bungled himself inside. Sliding the seat belt on he bumped his body comfortable.

"Cool interior. Looks mint" Ste fingered along the dashboard.

"The view has certainly improved"

Ste pursed his lips, finger waving around the car. "Kinda lucky you was passing by though ey?" Ste turned his face to look at Brendan trying to play the coincidence down.

"Hm yeah. Very lucky that"

Brendan shifted the car into gear and set off down the road. They traveled a few streets in relative silence, Brendan switched on the radio for the travel news and cruised along the busy road. They took it in turns to glance at each other, missing every opportunity to meet in the middle until they'd stopped at the traffic lights. Upon turning again, they both caught the other looking. Clear smiles formed for them both and perhaps a little excitement mixed in. Ste studied Brendan and vice versa, both trying to work each other out. Ste flushed bashful pressing the window down for the relief of cooler air.

"I missed you this morning, but my housemates didn't. Reveled in that believe me"

Brendan darted his eyes to Ste then the road "Oh yeah, I brought back the food box finally. The cookies all fell out though, oops" Brendan chuckled. He gazed at Ste again.

"I'd hoped to see ye when I popped round. The box had been an excuse" Brendan confessed, his head still alternating with the road and Ste's eyes. "Ye must have still been in bed"

"I was. Only missed you by half hour. And Brendan, you don't need an excuse to see me" Ste's voice was dainty, his stomach span with his nerves when they exchanged smiles. Brendan stopped at more traffic lights.

"So, come on then. What did they say?"

"What do ya think they said?" Ste snorted his laughter. "Wanted the lowdown. I explained there was nothing to tell"

"Nothin to tell? Steven, surely these last weeks have lots to divulge" Brendan spoke thickly enhancing his broad accent. Ste's cheeks fell aflame.

"Where's the fun in telling them everything? Besides, there's nowt to tell" Ste scraped his top teeth over his bottom lip while Brendan laughed. "Pack it in, it ain't funny! They actually trapped me at breakfast"

"Have ye eaten?"

"No, didn't get chance, I came to find you instead...I mean..." Ste sighed. "I wasn't on my way to town initially. I hoped I'd catch you and that's why I was outside"

"Looks like we both have great minds then. I'm hungry. Ye want to join me for breakfast?"

"Love too. Pancakes?"

"Hmm, sounds good. I know a place, bit of a drive but worth it"

They find a quiet cafe in the middle of nowhere. Brendan orders for them but Ste refuses to let him pay despite insistence. They go Dutch instead and Ste elates while they sit opposite each other and chat in a new surrounding that isn't away from the world. This time people can see them together and it feels good. Ste drizzles maple syrup all over his pancakes while Brendan sprinkles sugar and lemon juice on his before eating a mouthful humming in gratification.

"Might be a bit early for pancakes, but they're ace" Ste muses, chewing a piece. He takes a look around the café and the few people sat down to breakfast like they are.

"It's not actually. Makes a nice change, although I eat anything. Cooked breakfast is good. All food is good"

"Egg or Pineapple" Ste says, chewing his piece of pancake, he swills it down with his coffee and licks the inside of his gums cleaner.

"Egg, gotta be hasn't it?" Brendan gestures his fork in the air, gulps down his coffee and adds another sachet of sugar to it.

"No cause pineapple is just as good. Have you had enough sugar yet, you'll get porky" Ste warns with a wink.

"Or ye can have both and forget the decision" Brendan parts his lips with a smack. "Would it bother ye if I did get porky?"

"No cause ya look good"

"I look good?"

"So good" Ste replies, eyes straining over the half eaten pancake in front of him. He plays with it nervously. "For an elder" Ste smirks, eats some more breakfast.

"Okay, forget food...music? Who do ya listen to at night?"

"I listen to ye at night now, don't I?" Brendan looks at Ste who swallows deeply, gaze casting a spell he'll be trapped within for the rest of his days. He always looks younger somehow, especially when he's embarrassed. Brendan sighs contentedly. "Johnny Cash. Ye ever heard of him?"

"Nope" Ste shakes his head. "Is he old too?"

"Enough with the ancient jokes boy, I'll have ye doing lines"

"Ha ha, going all teacher on me. I'd rather just have you keep me back after class"

Brendan leans further forward "And what would we do?"

"Not lines that's for sure" Ste clears his throat as a waitress comes over with a bright smile. She clears up their empty plates and offers a top up of their coffee. Brendan gets another drink and waits until she and her pleasantries have left.

"Are ye all ready to study" Brendan asks, the cup in front of him becomes his focal point. If he concentrates on that he doesn't have to look into Ste's eyes. "Holidays flying past, isn't it"

"Gonna be weird going after all this time. Meeting loads of new people."

"I don't think that is a bad thing. Tons of guys your age will be there."

Ste's eyes bore into Brendan who takes his finger around the edge of his coffee cup. "Ye know, people your age, same interests and that." He knows he's pushing it now, he also knows how Ste is feeling about the way his words are being said.

"I don't care about that, why would I?"

"I don't know. They won't be ancient though, punching above their station" Brendan dares to glance up now. Ste is looking right at him, almost horrified. He's still beautiful though, even when mad, especially when mad. His cheeks glow red and his pupils seem to enlarge.

"Stop it...right now" Ste warns, drops his fork that clatters and echoes on his plate. Brendan swallows deeply.

"I ain't doing anything, simply stating the obvious"

"Really, well it might be _obvious_ to you, but to me it's stupid right" Ste says, his temper settles and he leans over on his folded arms. "Is this why ya brought me here?"

"What, no"

"I won't stop you know, coming round. I don't want this... _us_ to stop" Ste reaches his arm over, gently touches Brendan's hand. "Do you?"

"No, course I don't. I don't. Things will change though, you're young."

"I look forward to every day now. I will the clock to hurry when it crawls like a snail towards the end of the day because I'm closer, I'm closer to seeing you" Ste removes his hand then, anger replacing the hurt once more.

"You had no right coming into my life Brendan, making me feel wrong about this. We've done nothing but keep each other company. And it's all I want"

"I'm sorry" Brendan gulps down the lump in his throat created by the surge of guilt he feels, watches Ste stew behind his folded arms. There's the beginning of that pout he perfected long ago and it's becoming increasingly harder not to do something about it.

"It's all I want too. Nothings gonna change"

Ste dares to look up then, eyelashes sweeping. Brendan catches his breath at the sight of him. "Swear it"

"I fucking swear" Brendan replies, hands up to the air in complete surrender. Ste scoffs at the sight of him, unsure of whatever this is they have built up together. Ste knew it had become important to them both now. A slight hesitation flashing across his eyes pulls at Brendan's stomach muscles.

"What is it?"

"Does this mean, we can't tonight? I still wanna see you later"

"You're seeing me now..." Brendan mutters, his voice low and softening. He's kidding himself though. He needs to see Ste just as much, if not more. "Okay, just an hour alright? Then I will throw ye out"

Ste smiles then. So does Brendan. "Agreed, if you can bear to let me go that is"

"There is that hurdle, admittedly"

Ste grins satisfied. "Can I get a lift into town? I'll be late for me shift otherwise"

"Jesus, how has this much time just past by?" Brendan says, moves up out of his chair and follows Ste's lead out of the cafe. They get in the car and Brendan starts up the engine.

"Time always flies when ya having fun Bren. I've enjoyed this, we should go out more often"

* * *

September.

After having a shower, Ste changes into his tracksuit and rushes downstairs. His friends are all preparing for college, packing their bags ready. Ste has already done his ages ago, made sure everything was sorted so he could have more time for Brendan. He stills patiently when Amy stops what she's doing and comes over to him.

"Hiya, you off next door?" Amy asks, she leads them both into the kitchen while she fills up the kettle with water. "Want a brew?"

"No ta. And yeah, not for long though, gotta somehow try and kip don't I? Need a routine sleep pattern sorting out"

"It could be you are just not in the right bed anymore Ste." Amy winds her friend up and after switching on the kettle she clings heavy to his arm. Her eye winks suggestively leaving Ste confused.

"How do you mean, hang on...no. No it's not like that. We haven't..."

"Really, never?" Amy quirks her bottom lip. "You've been seeing each other all summer. And...I thought you liked him"

"I do, but we're just friends Amy"

"Friends? Ste come on" Amy sits down at the kitchen table.

"Alright, I'll confess to liking Brendan. I want him to make the first move though. The way he looks at me, I know he feels the same"

"It's good to see you happy. Go on then, I know it means a lot seeing him. And don't forget his invite to the party"

"Thanks Ames, see ya later"

Ste rushes around to Brendan's house, doesn't knock any more, the door is always left open for him now. Ste clicks the latch shut and ventures through the house. He eventually finds Brendan in the kitchen, amazing smell of vanilla hitting his senses. Ste angles his body across the middle counter again and gazes up at Brendan.

"There ye are. I made something for ye" Brendan says, turning around and pointing to his little creation.

"For me?" Ste shifts his head up, elongating his neck "Smells fantastic, what is it?"

"Crème brule. I thought I'd cook for ye instead." Brendan brings the plate around and gives one to Ste and one to himself. "Have ye had tea?"

"Yeah, now I can have pud too. This looks great." Ste uses his spoon and tastes the dish, eyes widening Brendan waits eagerly, smile infecting Ste's.

"Okay that... _oh yeah_ "

"Well naturally" Brendan practically preens himself, smugness leaving Ste chuckling. They eat the pudding in silence and Ste places the pots in the sink.

"So not only good looking, you're good in the kitchen too" Ste bows his body back against the counter, enough to show off his belly button. Brendan smacks his lips apart, eyes on Ste.

"I'm great in the kitchen, but I cannot cook. Just the pud" Brendan moves to the cupboard, stands next to Ste, makes sure the younger boy can feel the heat of his body and his eyes on him. Brendan pours himself a whiskey, one for Ste.

"Ye won't like it, but drink. It'll help ye to sleep"

"Ya want me to fall asleep? Jeez, all ya had to do was ask me to leave"

"I didn't mean that, I..."

"Kidding." Ste placates taking a sip, it burns his insides leaving him to cough. His eyes almost protrude from their sockets leaving a smile ghosting Brendan's lips "Bloody hell, that's strong"

"Told ye. It'll do ye good, warm the cockles"

"Cockles? I bet it does."

Brendan grins and lets out a chased breath. "I've missed ye"

"Aw, an I saw ya this mornin too. Remember you came into the coffee shop, _again_ " Ste teases and pauses with the smile he has when Brendan towers above him. It's true he'd visited one time to try out the coffee Ste had raved about and one day turned into most days for Brendan who needed to spend more and more time with Ste. The days had become a routine now, for them both.

"It's my favourite place to drink. The one to one service is great and the staff are easy on my eyes."

" _All_ the staff is it now? And there's me thinking...you only liked _my_ coffee" Ste hummed lightly gripping his fingers against Brendan's top, gazing through his thickset eyelashes. The older man pushing closer has Ste's heartbeat quickening pace.

"Ye know I only go in to see ye. And Steven, I _have_ missed ye"

"Oh." Ste licks his lips. "I've missed you too. Getting used to this, cannot believe we've spent the whole summer holidays together. My best ever. Cos when I was younger, summer holidays weren't great"

Brendan passed Ste his glass and grabbing his own, moved them both to the lounge. On the sofa they sat side by side now, barely an inch between them.

"Tell me then"

"I couldn't go to school and escape for those hours. Ain't it funny, cos most kids can't wait to get out of school. But for me it was the only time my bruises got to heal. So during the hols I'd try and stay in my room, or get up early and sneak out. I had no where to go though. Plus, ya know being young on the streets like that – it ain't the best. It's lonely and cold, even in the warmest months too. I got into mischief loads. Am I going on too much?"

Ste cocked his head up to Brendan who just sat there listening intently, he hadn't once moved. He gave a shake to the head. "What about your friends. Where were they during summer?"

"My friends were proper lucky, they all went away, abroad, hot exotic places. I wouldn't have minded, even for a holiday in the UK, but I never did owt like that. Me, I'd spend my time dodging bruises." Ste ended his memories with a deep sigh, he didn't feel sorry for himself though and Brendan caught that, the way he just accepted his past as a normality. A startling reminder to how that is an easy trap to fall in to.

Brendan's hand found it's way onto Ste's leg, gently fingering there. Ste watched a moment before his own hand settled on top, they'd linked together over a slow progression of nerves and understanding. Brendan felt protective towards Ste and he knew that, he felt the same for him too.

"Ye know, we had very similar childhoods, in the fact that both the father figures in our life had to resort to using their fists for comfort. Children shouldn't have to go through those kinds of things. Ain't it supposed to be an innocent time? The monsters are supposed to be in our imagination aren't they?"

"Not always Bren. Imagine if we could turn back that time, us both be the same age. We could've met then couldn't we? Be best friends who could run away and be happy like we are now. Because I am happy now, with you" Ste wove his fingers tighter with Brendan's and fell gentle on his shoulder.

"I hate what he did to ye and I hate he got away with it"

"I know you do, because I feel it too. When you speak about your dad. If I ever met him, I apologise to you now Brendan because I swear I'd..." Ste breathed heavier. They hadn't used much physical touch between them, but any shared had been because of comfort. Brendan unlinked their hands and held his arm high enough Ste could slide down into his body. His arm crushed so tightly it left Ste feeling choked with emotion and allowed his hand to settle over Brendan's chest huddling into this new warmth. Ste listened quietly to the beat of Brendan's heart and closed his heavy lidded eyes. Ste felt safe under the protection of him, a simple gesture had meant so much and opened his mind to the feelings that lay dormant and unsaid.

"Amy thought we were together. She stopped me before I came here tonight and asked about us" Ste admitted nervously, his hand stroked over Brendan's top, down his tummy. He felt the shape of his belly button through the material and thumbed there.

Brendan shuffled his body weight "Oh? How did ye answer that then?"

"Told her we'd never, like... _you know._ Said we were friends" Ste spoke cautiously, flicked up his eyes to the room and waited for Brendan's response.

"It's true though, we are." Brendan hesitated, leaned his cheek on Ste's hair "But, I think ye know how I feel, don't ye?"

"Yeah, same as me. I kinda like the way it's going, don't you?"

"Unequivocally"

"Brendan, stop using the posh words. Dunno why ya can't just say 'yes'"

Brendan's hand reaches down to Ste's ribs, he tickles them and then lifts his top and strokes his fingers over Ste's stomach to gain more giggles. But it's more a gasp he gets in reply, Ste's eyes flutter closed at the gesture leaving Brendan's stomach to knot. Brendan swallowed thickly and paved his full palm curving the now hollow of Ste's stomach.

"Do ye like that?"

"Took ya long enough" Ste laughs and strokes his fingers against Brendan's. "Thought I'd have to throw myself at ya"

"Why never tell me then, ye need to say these things"

"Just did Bren. Didn't know how I'd react, but it felt right"

"It does yeah"

"Because I trust you, that's why" Ste answers, resolutely. His smile is back again, a little nervous. "Weird init?"

"I'd say, comfortable. I might get used to it now"

"Fine by me that is" Ste turns and lifts his own hand up, boldly fingers across Brendan's moustache and smiles lifting the bristles. His eye line meets Brendan's who's compelled to look at him.

"What?"

"I just...was curious. Feels nice" Ste says, fans both his thumbs and curves the outline of the tache. Ste breathes deeply through his nose and settles back down on the sofa.

"Ye should feel the beard, _that tickles_ "

"If I ask nicely?" Ste grips his teeth over his bottom lip, his nerves are into overdrive.

Brendan laughs, body shaking Ste's head as it rumbles through his chest. Ste nudges him, and again leans his head back to look at Brendan gazing down upon him. Brendan's finger traces the outline of Ste's face, thumbs down across his lips and settles under his jaw. Ste feels Brendan's heart rate increase beneath him leaving his breathing non existent.

"Ye look good tonight. Can't keep my eyes off"

"Then don't, cos I like you looking. I want you too"

 _"Can I?"_ Brendan whispers deliberately, wanting his voice low and comforting, his warm breath finding a path to Ste's lips. Ste nods faintly and parts his mouth for the kiss Brendan gives him. Gasping slightly, Ste trembles against Brendan, the soft of his moustache and beard hair coaxes the silk of his skin to burn pinker while his mouth cups gentle movement. He already wants more, even as the kiss continues.

 _"Wow"_ Ste produces a breathy groan, dopey look on his face. Brendan's isn't much different though. They've surprised each other. Brendan laughs first but only by a second, Ste drags his palm down his cheek and over the soft of his beard, laughter forgotten on a breath.

"Shouldn't we do that again?" Ste entices, the hunger is heavy within his words.

They are so close. Ste can still feel Brendan's moustache feather light against the top of his mouth. Ste pushes up but Brendan's finger stops him, leaves their eyes to look and guess what the other is thinking. The older man quirks a sultry smirk, drags the pad of his finger enough to open Ste's bottom lip. Brendan angles the tip of his tongue into Ste's opening, enough he takes it and faintly sucks. Brendan moans, eyelids closing.

Ste's hand pulls Brendan down and instigates another kiss, lingers it because Brendan's lips are divine pressed with his own. Brendan still hasn't uttered any words leaving Ste creating doubts in his mind. "Wasn't I any good?"

"Ye took my ability for speech, I'd say ye are too good."

"Good answer. We're having a small party, at the house. A get together before college. Will you come?" Ste asked, his eyes soft gazing up at Brendan who hadn't moved from above him. The older man's gaze darted quickly as he looked at Ste. Slight chuckle leaving his mouth causing Ste to magnetise it.

"What?" Ste asked innocently.

"A house full of students, getting drunk and dancing all night. Think I might be out of place attending that don't ye?"

"No of course ya wouldn't. You could have a drink too. And a dance. You have moves right?"

Ste sat up straight when Brendan bumped himself back a little, he considered Ste a moment or two. "I don't really dance Steven. Never had the call to before. I do have the moves though, undoubtedly."

"I'll bet" Ste grinned with his little images of it. Brendan lowers his eyes to Ste's.

"I'll drop by on one condition"

"What's that?" Ste smirks the closer to him Brendan gets.

"Ye let me kiss ye again" Brendan says, placing his palm against Ste's cheek. Ste nods opening his mouth for Brendan but pulls back further and further, let's their lips touch faintly together. Ste slowly falls down on the sofa dragging Brendan with him. They laugh as he lands on top of him.

"Okay, this I will definitely get used too" Ste purrs placing his hands around Brendan's neck and sealing them in another kiss.


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you as always for the kind reviews. xx

* * *

The Boy Next Door

Part 3

"Steven about?" Brendan asks hurriedly as Rae answers the door. He darts his eyes inside the house hoping to catch a glimpse of the reason he's stood out there.

"Hi Brendan" Rae bares all her teeth as she greets, turns back and hollers into the house. "STE! You've got a secret admirer at the front door!"

"Hardly a secret" Brendan half mumbles gazing at his feet.

" _Ahh._ D'ya wanna come in and wait?" Rae suggests and thumbs back into the house.

"I won't as not stopping long, but thanks"

Brendan stands up straight when Ste comes to the door. Smiles exchanging between them, Ste's bottom lip ends up half curled between his teeth.

"Thought Rae said secret admirer" Ste plays down his initial reaction, calmly folds his arms against his chest and angles on the door frame. Brendan flashes a quick smirk.

"Expectin' someone else were ye...I could go if I'm in the way..." Brendan shrugs and starts to turn. Ste quickly unfolds his arms and grips Brendan's jacket in his hands drawing the older man close enough to marvel at the swept length of Ste's eyelashes.

"Well, seen as you're here..." Ste speaks quietly, his words trailing off while his eyes focus on him. Sliding his hands inside Brendan's jacket, Ste drew his fingers into the material underneath. "You comin in or..."

"Hi guys!" Tony appears at the door with a cheery smile, flour covering the apron he wears he brushes himself down quickly. "Sorry did I interrupt something? I'm always doing that, guaranteed when you're 'having a moment' there I am!" Tony says with a chuckle, he's almost hyper with his tone looking between a bemused Brendan and Ste who's just trying to get rid of him.

"Was there somet ya wanted.. _.only we are busy_..." Ste spoke through his teeth, eyes darting towards Brendan. Tony widened his mouth and nodded.

"Right, course. Listen I've just made some walnut cake"

"That's mint Tony" Ste says and grabs his friend to usher him indoors.

"No...walnut. Anyway, need ya to test it for me Ste"

"Right, save me a piece yeah" Ste slowly turned Tony back into the house. "I know it'll be perfect"

"Ohh nice this is. He ain't goin anywhere Ste!" Tony rolls his eyes at Brendan who was now chuckling to himself.

"Seems a nice guy"

"Oh he is, Tony is amazing. Even better with his timing. So, fancy some walnut cake?"

"Maybe next time, can't stop"

"Oh, flyin visit then. Well, I'm all yours"

Brendan hums his approval and leans over Ste "So, wanted to see ye. Well, I've two reasons" Brendan explains, his hand gesturing in front of him. "The first is, I need to go away"

Ste's face fell, eyes widening in surprise. "You're coming back, right?"

Brendan chuckles softly, head nodding. "Yeah, I am coming back. I've just got off the phone with my sister. Chez is coming over and I'm going to meet her. Flying into Liverpool tomorrow morning so I will stop over there tonight. Thought I'd take her out to a nice restaurant, I dunno"

"A restaurant sounds brilliant, she'll love it. An that's really great Bren, cause you two ain't seen each other in ages. Bet ya dead excited to see her"

"It was a little out of the blue I have to admit, but yeah...I am looking forward to it. Guess I haven't given her much choice. Chez would be waiting a long time before I went there"

"Only cause you don't wanna see ya Dad though. Don't be so hard on yourself" Ste says, swiftly coming to Brendan's defense. His hand cups against Brendan's and the warmth of him radiates along his skin.

"Staying away is easier but at what cost? Talking on the phone just isn't enough. Chez says she needs to tell me something, dunno what it is yet, but she won't travel all this way for nothing." Brendan silences with his thoughts before looking at Ste again. "Which brings me to the second thing, I'll have to cancel tonight and I'm needing to leave _soonish_ "

"Of course" Ste agrees, his eyes flicker to the ground. Brendan tilts his head and looks down at the younger boy try and disguise his slight disappointment.

"The timing isn't great I know, but I've a little while before I set off"

Ste looked up until he'd connected their eyes. It was funny how they'd slotted into their routine now, there hadn't been a day gone by they'd not spent time together and Ste felt it, the instant pull in his stomach thinking about missing Brendan. The selfish part of him had now to be buried so he smiled warmly instead.

"It's good you're seeing Cheryl init. You'll have loads to talk about" Ste says positively, moves his hand around Brendan's side to his back pocket and slides his fingers inside. Brendan turns to follow his arm.

"Yeah...copping a feel in broad daylight Steven?"

"You wish" Ste says, trying to sound unfazed despite his pinking cheeks. Brendan's jeans were bound tight to his curves and getting a good grip had Ste jerking Brendan's body forward. The way Brendan looks at him has Ste's heart leaping into his mouth.

"Don't get any ideas" Ste teased, although not opposed to the _ideas_ himself, Brendan's eyes were hypnotic while Ste's hand fed into his pocket.

"Wouldn't dream of it, sure what you're looking for isn't in my front pocket?" Brendan danced his eyebrows leaving Ste all a fluster.

After the arduous task of recovering Brendan's phone, Ste fiddled with it, lip protruding in concentration. "Ya don't mind me..?"

"A bit late to ask ain't it? Knock yourself out...what _are_ ye doing?"

Ste pivots edging back into Brendan and pulls him down enough they can see each other in the camera lens. "Takin a selfie, smile"

Brendan pinches Ste's bum in a nicely timed picture perfect moment and evokes a yelp and a shove in the shoulder until they're both laughing, so Ste takes another photo. "Jeez, better delete that one, look like I've bin electrocuted" Ste shakes his head and finds the one where they're laughing. "Make sure ya send it to me"

"If I ever get my phone back? I liked your face when I did this better" Brendan confesses nipping Ste's backside once more with a gratified moan.

"Oi, cheeky!"

"Yeah it was" Brendan winked proudly.

"There, put me number in your phone under 'Steven' cos ya never listen about that do ya" Ste feels happy enough to pass back Brendan's phone. "Right, call me so I have yours"

"What if I don't like to share my number?" Brendan watches Ste stare him down with slanted eyes and a scrunched up nose. "Good job ye look like an angel boy"

"Aww. Good, now we can keep in touch"

"Alright. Make sure ye do" Brendan pushes his phone back in his pocket. His eyes flicker up at Ste cautionary then at his car. Ste gets the message and they walk around to next door and settle at Brendan's car. The older man leans back against it so Ste can stand in front of him and place his hands on his chest, then Ste rests his forehead down against him.

"All the way to Liverpool. Nice little trip away, only place I ever visited were end of my street" Ste admits with a chuckle to himself. Lifting his head back up, Brendan's gaze is warm upon him.

"Ye make me laugh sometimes, next time ye visit, get us a postcard yeah?"

"Shurrup you" Ste grins bumping his nose against Brendan's. Ste feels his heart miss a beat once their eyes connect together fully. Brendan rubs his palms down Ste's arms with a firm grip.

"Are ye thinking about last night?" Brendan asks in a low voice, lips drifting from his ear lower to feather along the skin of Ste's neck. Ste feeds his palms around Brendan's hips nodding in answer. All night he'd thought about him.

"Laid in bed thinking"

"Really, did ye do anything about that?"

"Bren..." Ste glowed in embarrassment, cheeks lighting up bright red. Brendan tilts up Ste's face to see him wetting his lips.

"What was I doing in these thoughts of yours?" Brendan whispers seductively, eyes never leaving Ste.

"Just...kissing me an stuff" Ste looks down as he guides his hand, interlocking Brendan's fingers. "Imagined your hands on me again"

"I'll make it up to ye, promise" Brendan's thumb slides against Ste's lips as he licks them apart.

"You'll still come to the party? It's tomorrow night remember. Can you get back in time?"

"I will be here, and I'll come find ye"

"For a dance?" Ste is hopeful but Brendan dashes those thoughts.

"Ye ain't getting me on the dance floor Steven" Brendan parts them and gently pushes Ste out of the way so he can get in his car.

"Bring me somet back then?"

"Alright, what ye want... a lousy t shirt?, Fridge magnet?..." Brendan watches Ste lean down against his open window.

"No silly, I just want you"

"Now that, I can do" Brendan hooks his hand at the back of Ste's neck and brings Ste down. "Gift wrapped?"

"Hmm, can't wait for me pressie now" Ste says laying a long sweet kiss upon Brendan's lips. The older man watches Ste's lips fill with colour when they part.

"I'll be back tomorrow" Brendan says before he drives off down their street.

* * *

"Took me that long to drive here my beard grew another inch" Brendan says, his smile is gradually widened as Cheryl spins around and gets up from the table she's been sat at. The airport bustled with people in waiting areas and others rushing to catch flights the man on the tannoy announced. Cheryl placed her holdall on the floor and widened her arms animatedly.

"Bren!" Cheryl squeals contentedly walking straight over to her brother and wrapping her arms around him in comfort. Brendan could hear the sob in her throat and breathing struggle so he held her close and let his eyes close tight. It had been too long, he'd stayed away out of spite and in doing so hurt his own sister. Brendan nudged into her shoulder and let out a deep breath.

"I am sorry Chez, I hope ye will forgive me"

"Bren, it's so good to see ye! I can't believe we both of us left it this long" Cheryl spoke with a sadness in her voice and prized herself from Brendan's hold. He took his time to meet her eyes properly, didn't like to see them this way and especially after all the years they'd let pass by.

"It's good to see ye too. How are they Chez, my boys? My biggest regret is leaving them behind"

"They're good love, growin' fast as kids do. I still see Eileen sometimes, she told me ye send them money, presents. They are well looked after. Ye could come back ye know? It's never too late to make amends, especially when your heart is true" Cheryl guides her brother over to the table she'd been sat at and looked on at him in fondness when she cradled her hands over his. "I realise it would take time but Eileen would be willing to let ye see them again I know it"

"I'm glad Eileen let them have the presents and I'd always send money, reason I work. I think it is too late, what kind of father could I even be now? I couldn't come back, I just... ye know how hard I struggled to get away in the first place. Even if ye never understood it"

"I know ye kept things to yourself, there was only so many times I could ask what was wrong. I still cannot believe ye kept up with the teaching, especially as it was just to get at Daddy. I knew ye and Da never got along, but what about me? Brendan we were so close, and ye still left me there alone"

"Ye weren't alone though, you've friends, a life in Dublin. Ye could have come with me to England, I did ask, but ye chose to stay" Brendan spoke with a lowly voice, his eyes darting to his sister and then his hands. He could already feel him, crawling up through his veins like the poison he was. Even this far away he was always there. Brendan closed his eyes.

"Love, I need to tell ye something" Cheryl says, her words seem to infect Brendan. His eyes shade darker as they flick up to her while the blood beneath his skin spikes with the cold "It's Da..."

"No..." Brendan shakes his head. "Please tell me ye didn't ask me here for him"

"You've been away and missed out, how can I come here and not mention him? He's part of my life, just like ye once were, _are._ We're his family Brendan" Cheryl smiles nervously. "Da always did enjoy a tipple didn't he? Especially at Christmas, ye remember our Christmases Bren? They were such fun, weren't they? With the tree, and trimmings and..."

"Ah Chez, enough with the reminiscing, please. Just spit it out, alright?"

"He's sick"

Brendan looks at her incredulously. "Jesus, ye traveled all this way to tell me what I've known all my life? Of course he's _sick!"_ Brendan scoffs, head shaking. Cheryl looks horrified.

"Stop it! This is no time to joke! He's really ill Brendan. It's his liver. Da's been going to the doctor a while but he kept quiet, doesn't like to admit he's ill. Ye know Da, won't listen. Stubborn as anything."

"Well then, it's ironic. It's brought on by himself so why do we have to feel sympathy?" Brendan shrugs, sniffs sharply looking at his sister. "There's nothing we can do, except let fate take its course. He's lived a long time, long enough"

"Something changed ye Brendan. Made ye turn from a loving little boy into this...hard and unfeeling man. Ye don't feel anything do ye? Won't let anyone in, even me"

"That's not true. I love ye Chez, I never left because of ye. I left because I needed to take control of my life and the only way I could do that was without him. I was drowning under the hate he had for me. Such a failure for a son, ruined marriage, kids who don't even know me. I let him down with the pub and I am _glad_ he's gonna suffer like I did" Brendan takes in a deep breath. Doesn't know where to look, feeling agitated with the anger gathering in the pit of his stomach. His phone beeps in his pocket distracting him. Brendan reaches for it and opens the message.

 _'Missed u last nite x' S_

 _'Kept busy tho, got a new resepy 2 make u' S_

 _'Can't spell resepy ;P' S_

Brendan's lips form a small smile, tummy jolting as he reads each message. Cheryl glares over, eyes flicking between her brothers face and his phone screen.

"You're texting" Cheryl says pointedly, stares in amazement, the smile on her brothers face quite the contrast to how he'd felt moments earlier. She watched intrigued.

"Hm"

"Who has made ye smile Brendan?" Cheryl asks cautiously leaning closer to Brendan

"Steven" Brendan replies, his lips purse as he nods and replies to the messages.

 _'Recipe. :) Where are u?' B_

 _'In me room. U?' S_

 _'With Chez. Just met at the airport' B_

 _'Soz I will shut up. Say Hi tho...' S_

 _'Send me a pic' B_

 _'Why?' S_

 _'Wanna see u' B_

 _*Attachment*_  
 _'Like me pouty mouth? ;P' S_

 _'On me I do' B_

"Steven?" Cheryl asks curiously. "Who is he?"

Brendan pockets his phone again, mouth open loose he considers his sister a moment. "Alright, look. Ye traveled all this way, and we got a lot of catching up to do"

"Answer the question Brendan"

"Steven is..." Brendan paused, he wasn't sure how to answer. More than friends but not exactly together yet. Ste definitely made him happy, all Brendan had to do was think about him and...Cheryl was smirking at him then, like she could just read his mind.

"Oh my god, I can't believe it. Ye met someone?"

"Yeah, I did. Crazy as it sounds" Brendan admits with a shrug and captures his sisters smile.

"Okay, I wanna know everything. But I need ye to listen about Da too, promise me Bren" Cheryl says, her hand settles over Brendan's.

"I thought we could find a restaurant, wander around. I'd ask ye home but back at work soon" Brendan replied, still trying to avoid the subject of his father.

"No, this is just a quick visit Brendan. I wanted to clear the air and also make the first move. Perhaps now we can start as we mean to go on and actually see each other more often. I have some business here anyway, to take care of. So let's just make the most of this time"

"Business, here? What kind of business?"

"It's nothing, um, don't fret yeah. Ye said you've gotta be back tonight anyway right?" Cheryl flicked her eyes up cautiously to her brother who kept her gaze thoroughly. Cheryl smiled then. "Come on, let's go explore and we can talk as we do. Now tell me, how did ye and Ste meet?" Cheryl grinned at her brother as he respectfully accepted the inevitable interrogation. Brendan took her bag as they strode through the airport and to his car.

* * *

Brendan drove back home late evening after exchanging goodbyes with his sister. It had made Brendan feel better seeing her and now felt bridges had been built once more. The journey home had been a reflective one, with news his father was ill and the strain it was putting on her, Brendan was left wondering if all the time he'd stayed away had been for the best. At least back in Dublin he could take care of her instead of just being a voice on the end of a phone call.  
Driving into their street changed Brendan's thought pattern now as Ste became a focal point for him. Brendan pulled into his driveway and walked down Ste's pathway. Someone he didn't know had answered the door and his entrance had gone unnoticed at first. Finding some food at the buffet, Brendan filled his paper plate and mingled.

Brendan had kind of mingled, if you call propping up the wall of the lounge social. His line of sight had found Ste eventually, the young boy giving his all as he danced and smiled with the people around him. He seemed to have his own glow, an aura that radiated off of him. At least to Brendan he had, he couldn't stop looking at him.

And now someone else had noticed he couldn't. Brendan staggered his gaze to look down at Amy, stood holding her own plate of food, she ate graciously while she looked at Ste.

"You've been looking this whole time. At Ste...you've done nothing else since you arrived" Amy said, her head turned to Brendan then.

"I wasn't, I'm looking around the room, at everyone." Brendan watched Amy smirk placing a finger between her teeth. "That obvious huh"

"Well, yeah. It's good though and don't say I told you but, he's been worried you wouldn't make it tonight"

"No, I said I'd make an appearance. Amy isn't it?"

"Yep. I've known Ste since he was at school. Had a pretty nasty upbringing with Terry, well you know that yourself. Lately though, he's never stopped smiling. Know why that is?"

Brendan shook his head slowly, lips stretching thinly. "Nope...can't say I do"

"We all sort of cornered him other day, I'm guessing he already told ya. Call me cautious, you're new, almost a stranger. What do we know about you except that you live next door and steal Ste away from us every night"

"Ye don't have to worry about me Amy. It's taken me by surprise all this, Steven too. I mean it's early days in the fact we're still kind of finding things out" Brendan rounds his head, tip of his tongue just brushing the bottom of his lip. "Unless you're jealous. Is that the way it is?"

"Ha,gosh no. We've only ever been friends. I just care about Ste" Amy says, her head turns back to Ste and Brendan does the same. They both watch him smile and glow as he does. There's a slight sheen of sweat building on his face from the lights in the room.

"Right that's good, how about him..?" Brendan gestures to a young man dancing with Ste, getting a little too close for comfort. Amy shakes her head unsure.

"I've never seen him before, could be one of the newbies though. I know a few people got invited here, friends of friends? Everyone here is a student though"

The older man passes his plate to Amy and starts to wander off. Amy's hand secures around his arm, jerks Brendan to a standstill to look back at her. "Where are you going?"

"Think it's about time I said hello to Steven. Been here long enough haven't I?"

Brendan continues to stride over to Ste, watches the other student in front of him dancing with Ste. Young, puppy adoring eyes for Ste. It annoys him when perhaps it shouldn't do. They weren't officially together, but Brendan wanted them to be and he wasn't into sharing the boy who had a firm place in his life.

"Having fun gentlemen" Brendan says bitterly, his head turns to the other guy. Ste slows down his dancing, eyes darting between them both. He clocks more of Brendan though, his demeanor, the way he stands, shoulders stiffening.

"Brendan..?" Ste stares at him half dumbfounded half elated to see him.

"Couldn't help noticing ye dancing, together." Brendan says, eyes still on the new annoyance. The other man is irritated because Brendan is blocking his view of Ste and tries to edge around him. Brendan matches his move instantly. "Don't ye have to be getting ready for college in the morning? Wouldn't want ye staying up too late"

"Brendan, stop being rude to my mates. Doug, I am sorry..." Ste tries to apologise, his new friend swiftly turns to Brendan, gestures his arms wide to the room.

"Hey...who the hell are you? Someone's _Dad?_ How embarrassing, turning up uninvited. Now if you care to move, I was here first" Doug's american accent is strong booming against the loud of the music. He turns to look at Ste again, back to Brendan as he dismisses his existence.

"Actually, _I was here first"_ Brendan says, voice almost a predatory. Ste simmers inside and gains Brendan's full attention abruptly swinging him around by the arm.

"I dunno what is going on here right. Doug is a student, he was just dancing with me Brendan! There ain't a flippin law against it – unless it's the one you've obviously just made up in your tiny mind that is" Ste scolds Brendan sternly allowing Doug the chance to gloat over it. Ste is left unimpressed by them both.

"It was nice to meet ya Doug, an I'll see ya in college yeah?"

"You can count on it Ste." Doug smiles smugly at Brendan but is soon left spluttering when Ste guides him on his way abruptly. Brendan stands there alone with Ste now, sporting a defiant ' _come on then'_ expression. Feels he's done nothing wrong.

"You, my bedroom." Ste demands, his tone has an edge to it that kicks the every hair on Brendan's body to life. Brendan can't help but grin, mischievously moving to get up very close and personal with Ste. The younger boy seems to play along, gripping Brendan's shirt collar between his fingers.

"Ye really shouldn't speak like that. Gives people the wrong impression"

"Does it. Well let me make it clearer for you...my bedroom... _now_ " Ste warns and pushes Brendan into his room downstairs, backs up against the door with a fast click.

"Do ye fancy him?" Brendan blurts it out, hand gesturing towards Ste. He's uneasy on his feet, feels weak, powerless. Ste is knocked completely off guard, wasn't expecting Brendan to be so forthright.

"Ya what? How, _how_ do ya get to ask me that?" Ste strides closer to Brendan, face angled up to him. Ste feels his temperature soar beneath his clothes.

"Answer the...it's a simple question. Or do I need to spell it out for ye, in case"

"Ya nasty git. You're cruel when you're jealous you know that?"

"Nah, way off. I ain't that."

"Come on then, Mr 'I know everything' You tell me when I've had the time to fancy im ey? I've just met Doug tonight!"

Brendan scoffs bitterly, sits down hard on Ste's bed. "I didn't like it"

Ste blows out a long breath, strokes the back of his neck and moves to sit next to Brendan. "You didn't like it so ya gotta throw your weight around?"

"Maybe, yeah. Maybe" Brendan shrugged, looked around the room. "How did we get to this stage, when did things become...nuts?"

"I dunno" Ste says, his smirk feels as delicious at it looks. "One kiss has this effect on ya? Well, a couple if we're keeping count like..."

Brendan shakes his head, forearms laying over his thighs. " _One kiss._ Moved your world didn't it?"

"Yeah it did, enough not to look elsewhere" Ste reassures Brendan with a hand to his arm, squeezes his fingers.

"Brendan. I ain't interested okay? There's this _gorgeous_ , hairy man in my life, an I've thought about im all night" Ste admits after a nervous pause, swallows looking back at Brendan. The older man feels the thump of his heart, it's harder than it's ever sounded behind his rib cage.

"That's me right?" Brendan points to himself with a grin. Starts to move closer to Ste who shakes his head, bottom lip edging beneath his teeth. Ste clambers back on his bed and lays down as Brendan climbs after him, crawls the length of his body and settles above him. Ste feels his breathing uneven, eyes fluttering up to Brendan.

"So, good trip?" Ste asks as the smile stretches across his face.

"Not bad, we got to build bridges again and yeah, it was needed"

"You do look like a weights' been lifted, I'm glad it went well for ya. And then ya come here an cause havoc" Ste chuckles softly and feels his eyes shift quickly with Brendan's gaze.

"I have missed ye" Brendan sighs his words. "Your messages kept me sane ye know that?"

"Really? I didn't say much...missed ya too" Ste strokes his hand against Brendan's cheek, brushes his thumb along his beard hair.

Brendan smiles and leans in and is relieved when Ste does the same, lips wet and slightly parting. It both relaxes him and creates those little flutters inside his stomach. There's a heartbeat between them, their lips almost touch when the door knocks and then swings open. Brendan turns, flickers his eyes up and sees the student from earlier. Cocks his head just so, about to dismiss the irritating cling on.

Ste shatters his intentions by quickly shifting from beneath him and getting up off the bed. Ste joins Doug at the door while Brendan gives his new enemy, _interruption_ , the evil eye treatment. It seems to work too, those innocent eyes of his aren't that baby blue after all. He leaves and Ste comes back over to Brendan and pushes him back down on the bed, sits and rests his hand on Brendan's thigh.

"Right, you ever done shots?"

"As in tequila? I'm more a whiskey man"

"Come on, it'll be fun Brendan, let ya hair down. Just one...for me" Ste curls his lips into a pout as he walks them back out of the room. Brendan shakes his head, eyes rolling.

"One, and _I'm_ pouring them"

They wander over to the bar that's set up in the living room. A little crowd is gathering as Tony stands there a little out of his depth with a bowl of lemons and a pile of mini salt shakers. Brendan rounds the bar confidently and holds onto Tony's shoulders, flashes a gin.

"Greetings..?"

"Tony"

"Nice to meet ye again Anthony, if ye wouldn't mind...let me work my magic"

Tony gawps at him until Ste pushes his way to the front and leans across the bar. "It's okay Tone, Brendan used to work in a pub. Let him have a go

"Be my guest Brendan" Tony says, feels relief the pressure is off. Brendan shuffles out of his suit jacket neatly laying it over one side, rolls his sleeves up and with a flick of his wrists looks at everything to make sure he's set up. Ste watches on with a permanent grin, his friends nudging his sides and making him worse. He can't help it though, Brendan looks incredible.

"So who's first?" Brendan asks, glares along the many faces stood at the bar, he's generous with a wink for Ste. Brendan lines up shot glasses and pours the liquid into them barely spilling a drop. Everyone grabs one including Brendan. Grabs the salt and pushes the bowl of sliced lemon and limes to choose from to the front. They all neck back a shot each and Brendan laughs at the sour face Ste pulls after sucking the lemon. All he can think about is kissing his lips, they're still shining from the juice leaving Ste to lick it off. Brendan hands the bar back to Tony who gets a chorus of cheers when he lifts the bottle of tequila in his hand.

Ste works his way to the end of the bar through the students, knocks a salt shaker over and tips the granules along the wooden bar. "Oh that's bad luck" Ste mumbles and after brushing it into his hand tosses it over his left shoulder. Brendan coughs and splutters getting a face full of the white grains and flicks his eyes up at Ste unamused and begins to walk slowly up to Ste, shoulders stiffening.

"No I'm sorry...hey I'm really sorry... it's, well it's bad luck init?" Ste tries to explain himself, the reason he'd thrown the salt without thinking. Brendan gains on Ste, heightens himself and keeps his eyes fixed with the younger boy who backs up to the bar with a little jolt. Nowhere to go he looks at Brendan and silently tries to explain it had been an accident.

The older man presses full frontal against Ste and reaches behind him, the clink of individual ice pieces can be heard and Ste catches a glimpse of them internally asking Brendan to not even dare. The ice slithers down his back, pin pricks of the cold raising every individual hair on Ste's body to stand to attention. Eyes wide, Ste lets out strangled deep moans enticing Brendan even further in his mischievous grin and laughter. He rocks on his feet and leans behind Ste's ear

 _"Is that what ye sound like, when ye come?"_ Brendan whispers, releases a sharp warm breath down the back of Ste's neck.

 _"Bren..."_

"What? I was curious"

Brendan continues to keep his voice low, lets his lips brush against Ste's ear. _"I want to say sorry. Can I kiss ye again?"_

"Now? In front of everybody?"

Brendan places himself in front of Ste again and looks at him intrigued. _"You're not ashamed are ye?"_

"No. I'm just surprised you wanna kiss me in front of..." Brendan silences Ste. The cool of his lips still have the chill of the lemon and sour of the citrus juice taste. Ste's tongue bursts with salt and tequila as they make it deeper. They're smiling when they part. "Everyone..." Ste scoffs

"I don't care who sees us. Ye look so good, they wouldn't blame me"

"Ta. You look amazing in that suit, and behind the bar. I liked seeing you do that, take charge."

"Excites ye does it, wanna be shown who's boss do ye?"

"Maybe, I do." Ste nibbles his bottom lip redder, Brendan flicks his eyes up around the room at all the students, they're getting larey now the alcohol is flowing. He grabs his jacket and takes Ste outside. The older man sighs out his earlier mistake after thinking about it again, turns to look at Ste.

"We could discuss it, ye know, think about taking this to the next level" Brendan suggests, gestures between them both.

"Well we've tried the kissing, that's spot on for me" Ste laughs then, Brendan scoffing with him. Shakes his head and gazes at Ste.

"Ye could come round after college, see if we can't settle what's really happening here. Don't think I could control myself seeing Douglas going all ga ga over ye again"

"Aw don't be mean. He's seems nice"

"Nice, really?"

"Forget im. So tomorrow night? Me and you, but can I suggest we take it slow?"

"Am I rushing things? I can back off. We don't even have to speak..."

Ste holds his fingers to Brendan's mouth. "Hush ya daft sod. I just mean, it's kinda hot, dragging it out. _"_

Ste clasps his hands over Brendan's shirt, pulls him towards him, there's a glint in his eye and the way he nibbles his bottom lip has Brendan smirking. Brendan backs Ste slowly against the wall of his house, enough to get Ste's heart racing. Ghosts their mouths.

"Ye think I'd take advantage when you're drunk, huh?"

Ste sucked indolently at his bottom lip, grin following his giddiness. He stared into Brendan's eyes for an age until he'd seen Brendan's mouth settle loose and relaxed. Their eyes darted quicker.

"No. No ya wouldn't do that. Cos you're amazing. I'm just tipsy cos of the tequila an beer. I think you want more though"

"Do ye want more?"

"Yeah. I really fancy you. I also know I will be dead embarrassed in the morning after admitting that." Ste huffed a breathy laugh, moving his hands to the collar of Brendan's shirt his thumbs pushed underneath and stroked along the warm of his skin.

"Right, to balance it out between us... _I really fancy ye too"_ Brendan whispers directly into Ste's ear leaving a shimmer to filter down his body. Brendan pulls back to look at Ste again. "Ye should at least allow me to kiss ye goodnight."

"You're leaving now?! But I've only seen ya for like five minutes!" Ste protests, widens his mouth disapprovingly.

"I should go really. This party ain't my thing, and it's first day back to work for me, you've college. Both need an early night"

"Won't be the same not spending time with ya though"

"Ye need to be with your friends in there tonight, but we could entertain ourselves a little while longer." Brendan moves his lips to Ste's. Presses tight heat between them. Ste grabs a handful of Brendan's shirt and yanks him flush with his mouth. Ste confident slips a little tongue and Brendan pushes his body closer in response, widens his kiss leaving Ste thirsting for more.

Brendan smiles before backing off. Ste quickly grips hold of his cool shirt material between clawed fingers, not quite ready to let go yet.

 _"Wait..."_

Ste hums kissing Brendan again, lets his tongue creep out and part through Brendan's lips. The older man latches onto it with his own and has them groaning together. Ste is planted roughly against the wall, has him gasp and then kissed desperately. They both vie for control but it's Brendan that breaks it first, leaving Ste to pursue his lips in greed.

"Thought ye said slowly?" Brendan teases, nudges his nose softly along the back of Ste's ear. They laugh on breath and vibrate with the beat of their hearts.

"Tomorrow then" Ste breathes, finally letting Brendan go he watches him walking down the path. His hand is wrapping around the handle of the gate.

 _"No, wait..."_ Ste's voice strangles slightly as he huffs out a chased laugh, Brendan stills and turns to look back at Ste, stands there a few moments before rounding his head.

"Okay" Brendan speaks low, holds out his hand. "Come back to mine for a drink"

Ste's smile turns into a wide grin hurriedly moving to link their fingers lightly. "Just one?"

"That's all you're getting" Brendan lowers his face, eyes darting with Ste's. His fingers tighten as he leads them next door.

* * *

Amy pushes Ste's bedroom door ajar and looks genuinely surprised to see him sat out of bed rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He'd managed a few hours and suspected the harsh whiskey nightcap had helped, that and given him bad heartburn. His palm rubbed at his chest before looking back at Amy's gawped face.

Eyebrows hitting her hairline, little grin going on she animatedly crept into his room and perched on the bed. "You look different" She said, eyes scrutinising Ste's facial expressions like a detective on a mission. Ste yawned and stretched his arms up high above his head. The smirk he purposefully kept in full view for her. Amy huffed loudly wanting the lowdown from her friend.

"Oh come on Steeee!" Amy whined petulantly, impatient hands grappling his forearm jerking it up and down. The unknown keeping the young girl on pins.

"There's nowt to tell Ames" To be fair, there hadn't been much to tell really. They'd managed to keep their hands off each other for the most part. Ste pulled at his bottom lip whitening the blood red of them.

"You're glowing"

"So?"

"So we all know when you blush it's because of guilt or because you're keeping a delicious secret"

"Well I ain't guilty" Ste honks out his laughter, he loved winding Amy up it was too easy.

"You stay out late all the time, I sometimes hear you sneak in. Then there's last night. I caught him kissing you at the bar, could hardly miss that and then you both disappear again. How is our neighbour?"

"He's very well, why don't ya go visit."

"Because he prefers you visiting. What time did you roll in Ste?"

"Um, didn't keep a track of the time. We were too busy" Ste burns up, knows his cheeks are colouring with it. He wanders into the lounge and sits down with Amy.

"What's Brendan really like?" Amy crosses her legs on the couch angling towards Ste. "I like how he makes you happy, we did have a chat, at the party. I raised a couple of concerns - only because I care about you though. But he seems...good for you"

"I know ya care, and it means a lot to me that ya do. We are friends but we want more. I definitely do. Brendan is funny, kind, amazing. He makes me feel like I'm the only person in the world"

"Ste, are you falling for him?"

"I dunno if it's love, but I miss him. An he's only next door. We have had a couple of kisses. The first time was the other night. I actually melted on his sofa though, we barely even _touched_ Amy." Ste says, smile plastering along his lips. "We know what we want, but this taking our time feels better, because it's..."

"Hot"

Ste giggles, he nods admitting defeat. "Yeah, well not just hot. Feels right and I'm already counting down the hours to see him tonight. Just gotta get college outta the way first"

"Hmm" Amy agrees, finally getting up to her feet. "Be good to go back, see everyone again."

"Still can't believe I managed it, college. Terry said I'd never amount to anything. Proved him wrong"

"You don't have to prove anything to anyone Ste. I knew you could achieve anything you put your mind to. All of us will gain from this. You'll even make new friends to hang out with too, with the new students this year" Amy says, her eyes are fleeting.

"Don't need any more do I?" Ste replies, sightly annoyed. "Anyway, come on. Busy day"

* * *

The lecture room was busier than Ste had envisioned. A few new faces in the room, all sat down in their own little groups nattering away among themselves. Ste blew out a long quiet breath and stood taller seeing an arm stretched up in the air waving to him.

Rae was sitting there, bright grin on her face. "Ste, over here"

Ste relaxed and tried not to make too much eye contact with the rest of the students. Slipping into the chair beside his friend he was able to relax and placed his bag on the desk.

"There's loads of students in't there?" Ste shifted sideways to lower his voice.

"Yeah, but we are in college Ste" Rae replied, stating the obvious. Ste glared around the room and threw his bag under the desk. The room continued to fill up with students until each chair was occupied. Loud and abrupt, the noise from everyone's collective chit chatter filled the room. Ste sighed at it, far too noisy for his liking, already feeling the pressure of a headache brewing. Ste rubbed his temples, eyes closing in the hope it would help his thoughts return clearer.

Eventually the noise did lower, although not completely. Rae nudged her elbow at Ste's side and just for a moment he stayed non committal, circling his temples a few moments longer. His friend became over irritable, elbowing Ste for fun now because it's become constant. Ste let out a breath, eyes opening slowly, the light from the room hurting a little. His lack of sleep wasn't helping him, stifling a yawn.

Ste realised Rae was still poking him so he turned to her sharply. "What? Can you not do that, it hurts"

"Ste, have you not heard me? I've been trying to tell you. Look" Rae grips Ste's face and shoves it to the front. "Look who's here"

Ste blinks a moment or two, looks around the students. He doesn't reconise any of them. "Rae, I am looking, what am I meant to be seeing?"

"Wow, not the only one who needs glasses." Rae replies, hand angling Ste directly to the front of the classroom. "Our tutor, does he look familiar?"

Ste looks at the back of a tall dark haired man, shirt on and sleeves rolled up the arms. Tight trousers, a very nice backside view. Ste grins and looks back at Rae. "Yeah, he's a fit arse, I'll give him that"

"No...look harder Ste"

Ste huffs out a sigh and slightly stands up, just a little to glance over the stupid haircuts in front of him. He has to wait an age for this tutor to turn around, but fair play to the man who had a great bum. Ste hummed appreciatively. When the man turned he saw the glasses first, dark rimmed covering the bluest eyes beneath them. Ste slanted his eyes a split second before it hit him.

Ste's mouth parted slowly, eyes widening and body falling back down into his chair with a bump. His entire body mapped in goosebumps.

"It's him isn't it? Next door, the bloke you've been seeing?"

"I haven't, we're just friends...he's wearing glasses" Ste stutters his words, he can't believe it. "He's... _here"_

"Yeah, took me a moment to realise it was Brendan. Glasses threw me. Oh well, teachers pet gonna be obvious this term. Better buy an apple tree, find a spot an get it planted in the garden"

"Stop it" Ste snapped un-amused, he looked at his friend then back at Brendan. "Do I say owt?"

"No, leave him to do the class. He'll find ya"

Ste chewed incessantly at his bottom lip, gazed at Brendan pottering about at the front, he'd written 'Mr Brendan Brady' in perfect scroll writing along the white board on the wall. Brendan perched on the front of his desk, holding a clipboard in his hand he read out names one by one. Ste waited eagerly for his own to be read out.

"Steven..." Brendan paused reading the name. Ste caught his brief smile and it burst through his heart. "Steven Hay"

"Here" Ste replied, voice wobbling. Brendan stilled, looked up from the clipboard and searched the different faces in the room. Their eyes met because Ste stood up properly, inching a smile and shrugging with the irony.

 _"Steven..."_ Brendan whispered, he felt his heart sink, but he endeavoured to hide that from the young boy. Brendan's eyes darted around the room at the company he needed to remember. He carried on then, read out each name on the list before continuing his class. Ste listened intently to his teachings, made eyes at him whenever he'd glanced in his direction. It was a lot of the time he did, neither of them could bare to take their eyes off one another. The entire class seemed to fly by for Ste who spent the most part of it in a dream.

Rae ushered him back into the room a few times though, while they studied together or read context of the English books they had in front of them. Ste however, was more interested in his tutor, the man who he'd spent all summer long with and now he could spend his college days in his company too. However it was far and away as simple as that.

Brendan flickered his eyes up at Ste but his gaze seemed distant from the usual, saddened and regretful and it pulled inside Ste's stomach on more than one occasion. At the end of the class instead of waiting around, Brendan had fled the classroom quickly. Ste was left feeling confused and hurt by his reaction.

"What did I do?" Ste turns to Rae for answers. "Did I upset him?"

"No, I don't think so. He'll be shocked seeing you that's all. Probably never crossed either of your minds, never expected this happening. I mean he never said owt did he?"

"Yeah, shocked is putting it mildly. I never even thought, just assumed he'd be teaching at one of the senior schools. Plus he'd have _definitely_ told me about this"

"Go find him at the end of the day, they'll be an explanation Ste. Don't dwell on it alright?" Rae hugs onto Ste tightly before they both leave the room.

* * *

Earlier that morning

Brendan is up early on the morning of the new term. The day is dark and miserable, clouds congregating like smoke bellowing in the sky. Brendan angled his face up and caught the mist of fine rain as it clings to his soft facial hair. He drives a mile down the road to pick up his friend Anne who is ready with an umbrella poised waiting on the pavement. She waves and gets into the car, settles herself comfier.

"Gonna be strange isn't it? Teaching the older lot? I mean it's good in one way mind, they won't give as much cheek back. A bit late to tell us I know, but I like a bit of drama me" Anne hums to herself, switches on the radio.

"That's why ye teach it Anne, drama" Brendan looks at her absently as he speaks, he'd been half listening to his friend. Finding his mind was elsewhere, a certain someone who he couldn't stop thinking about even if he'd wanted too. Brendan must have been smiling with his thoughts though because Anne's fingers clicked sharply in front of him and blinked him back into the car.

"You have been acting far too suspiciously of late. Where are you?" Anne quizzes, her eyes slant suspiciously.

"I'm sat right here Anne. Driving us to work. Look - see" Brendan gestures to the school he's pulled up at and they both jerk with the brakes. Anne points to the school, head shaking.

"Well that's wonderful if we were meant to be here. Didn't you hear a word I said?"

"Somet about older kids - what do ye mean we ain't working here. I have the address right here..." Brendan opens the glove compartment and shows a letter to an awkward looking Anne.

"Ah...that was the old placement" Anne licks her dry lips and fishes out a crumpled envelope from her bag, passes it to Brendan to read its contents. He does and when he fades to a whiter complexion she holds onto Brendan's shoulder.

"What's wrong...you look like you've seen a ghost"

"I can't work here, Anne. This has to be a mistake, it's gotta be!"

"Blimey, calm down. You know it can change where we're sent Brendan, happened before and you still kept most of your colour, always pale like, but still. What does it matter as long as you're earning. It'll be a new experience for both of us working with young adults for a change...Brendan, why is this such an issue?"

"I have to sort this quickly." Brendan releases the breath he's held and tosses the letter into Anne's lap. He drives with haste to the college and silently prays he won't see Ste. His friend is left feeling concern for him as he leaves her and finds his way to the headmasters office. He barges past the secretary, young and scantily clad, clothes tight on her body. The girl wobbles trying to run in her heels after him.

"Excuse me, hang on a moment! Ya can't just barge in there you know? It's my job to book you an appointment."

"Listen..."

"Teresa"

"Teresa, lovely name, yeah. I have to speak with the headmaster"

"Mr Blake"

"Yeah...Mr Blake"

"Patrick I call him though, he let's me sometimes if I am good. Although he's kind of a stickler for the rules" Teresa waffles on, walks to her desk and sits down. She chooses a pen and grips it in her fingers. "So your name is?"

"Mr Brady" Brendan feels his brow perspire, the nerves he's experiencing are making him feel ill. He has to get out of this college. "Look, I appreciate you've got a job to do, but this cannot wait. He's in here?"

"Yes, but..." Teresa holds her hand up feebly, watches Brendan walk into Patrick's office. A loud tut clicks off her tongue before she finds her nail varnish again.

Patrick is curling the page to his paperwork lost in thought when Brendan appears in his office, face determined and flushing a slight red. The headmasters' expression that of intrigue before he stands up and looks on disapprovingly.

"Excuse me, you cannot just barge in here"

"Jesus, is this the palace or something? Easier to get into fort knox than your office" Brendan exasperates. "I need a transfer"

"A transfer?" Patrick repeats, confusion on his face. "Why?"

"Why? Good question that. Really good. Erm, I was supposed to be at a school a mile from here, had work set out and papers. Nothing for this place so I'm unprepared"

"Doesn't matter. We provide everything that you'll need, all the coursework and timetables. List of class students will be on your desk. It's really not that dis similar to high school except the work load is more in depth. English teacher, Mr Brady" Patrick says, pulls out his drawer and a file. Sits down methodically and starts flicking through it.

"Ah yes, I remember now, yours was an unavoidable last minute placement alongside Miss Minniver. Two of our teacher's had to leave suddenly so you've been drafted in at short notice. Only a slight hiccup for yourself I'm sure, I see you live nearby so isn't out of your way. You did well I see from your credentials and certainly your references are impeccable. You'll be an asset to this college"

"Mr Blake, Patrick. I can't be here. Not _here_ "

"Again, why?"

 _"Because he's...and if I am..."_ Brendan speaks low, hitches breaths and feels himself struggle. He sits heavy into a chair nearer to the desk. "Couldn't ye get another teacher?"

"Not at this short notice. Seems to me you have little conscious letting down your students. It's farcical, on the first day of term too, tell me why you bother to get out of bed with such lack of commitment, hm?" Patrick sinks lower back into his chair, eyes slanted at Brendan.

"I am committed to my job, I just wasn't expecting to be at this college."

"This is a fine college I'll have you know, the grades acquired here shine excellence. Partly due to the tireless work of its tutors. I trust you will be one of our exemplary examples Mr Brady"

Brendan grits his teeth, eyes closing with the with the cursed irony of the situation. He had no time to warn Ste, no time to explain how much of an impact this would have on them. "I'm sure I can manage that, for as long as I am here. I still want a transfer, as soon as feasibly possible please." Brendan pushes himself out of the chair and leaves the office quickly.

* * *

It had been a long first day for Brendan, the hours had seemed to go on a lifetime. First day there's always a process, whenever they go to a new place. You have to meet everyone, every single staff member. Even though the likelihood you'd see them more than a handful of times or remember their name was slim. It's a way to break the ice and settle you in, make you feel a part of the place. This doesn't work this time for Brendan though, spending the most part thinking of ways to get out of there. Every room they walk in, each corridor they stride down he thinks he'll see Ste.

All he could think about was how beautiful he looked in class, the first moment they discovered each other there. Brendan saw the question in Ste's eyes. _Why are you here?_ He doesn't even know where to begin, how he's supposed to explain it because he can't do that for himself. Just as things were getting to a point where he was happy enough to make a commitment, let those barriers down and Ste into his life, they'd hit a dead end.

 _"Brendan?"_ His name had never sounded so desperate in the wrong circumstance. Brendan closes his eyes, Ste had found him instead.

Ste stands behind him, having seen the older man tense up upon hearing his name, shoulders stiffening. Ste did seem cautious at first, then concern fell through his body. "You're a tough man to track down. Can we talk, please?"

Ste found Brendan in the middle of a long corridor. Having spent the day actively seeking out the older man, his back was towards him and he could then hear two voices, another person approaching Brendan. The other voice he recognised.

"I'll see you tomorrow Brendan, first day back is always the hardest huh?" A pretty lady appears from the side of Brendan, her smile is friendly and when she gazes at Ste he sees it's Anne.

"Hello again, fancy seeing you here" Anne says, looks at Ste and then Brendan. Then she works it out and gestures to Ste. Her eyes sadden instantly. " _Oh"_

"Anne, don't ye have somewhere to be right now. Marking paperwork perhaps" Brendan speaks with a dismissive voice.

"Perhaps...yes. Oh love"

Anne looks with pity at Ste, it seems to filter back to Brendan too and it doesn't take a genius to know she knows more than she lets on. "Now I know why you were dead against coming here. Brendan, I am sor..."

"Anne! Leave it, please" Brendan grits his teeth while he speaks and Anne nods listening to his wishes.

"Alright. I'll see you tomorrow"

Anne walks past, her heels echo down the corridor. Ste watches before looking sheepishly at Brendan, the older man still doesn't turn around. It's like he's fighting internally and that in turn makes Ste begin to feel a dread filling inside his body.

"I um, so this is a turn up for the books. I know you said teacher...but I figured ya meant _school_ teacher" Ste swallowed, eyes darting up to the back of Brendan. "Please turn around. I keep thinking you've fallen out with me"

"I haven't fallen out with ye" Brendan speaks sincerely, turns to look at Ste finally. He's still wearing his glasses and Ste goes to reach for them curious. Brendan backs off fast, removes them and glances around.

Ste winces, arms instinctively collapsing around his body. "So what's going on. Did you just forget to tell me?"

"No, of course not. I wouldn't do that to ye"

"Okay. I don't like this, the way you're acting is weird. Kinda scaring me. Last night, you wanted my company more than anything, but now it seems I'm the worst thing in your life"

"Steven, we shouldn't be doing this. I didn't know...they changed my placement. Wish to god I'd checked before we..."

"What, before we...became friends you mean?" Ste manages a strangled laugh, head shaking incredulously. "Have you always been this much of an arsehole, or is it just since you became better than me?" Ste snaps in anger, he can feel himself slowly getting upset.

"I should go...I've a ton of paperwork to mark so"

"You said you'd find time no matter what. You swore it" Ste felt the tremble in his words, the awful sink in his stomach. The corridor they were stood in was quiet now, students finishing up for the day. Brendan still continued to glance around them unnerved.

"Bren, what about last night? Today was gonna be the start of us" Ste could feel the sob in his words, so he was sure Brendan could hear it.

"It's late yeah. Ye must have assignments to start"

"No, you better start giving me answers Brendan. It's..." Ste struggles to stay strong, he can see the answers that lie in his eyes. "No..." Ste shakes his head.

Brendan shuffled on his feet, he couldn't look at Ste. The floor being his safest bet. He could hear the sound of Ste's breathing, it continued to change rapidly, becoming difficult. He closed his eyes, head shaking he couldn't take the sounds it made. "Steven, please, I haven't any choice"

"Don't end us, you can't"

"I'm your tutor, I have a responsibility" Brendan couldn't believe the words coming out of his mouth, he just sounded inexplicably cowardly. He was good at turning off his emotions though, spent enough years perfecting the ability, but he was now hurting the person he cared most about by doing so.

"Please, don't..."

"Ye will make new friends. Lots of them. Ye don't need, me"

"No, right. _You swore_. But now you're my poxy English tutor, is that it? Can't be seen with me" Ste bit back, anger continuing to replace the obvious hurt he felt. He didn't know, but Brendan was hurting too. The older man just seemingly better at hiding it.

"Can you?"

"Jesus, are we back in nursery here?" Brendan chuckles in a badly timed moment of sarcasm. Ste's face reddens.

 _"CAN YOU!?"_ Ste screamed and the sound echoed down the corridor. It had Brendan finally allowing their eyes to perfectly match each others. He swallowed thickly and struggled to form his reply.

"No, okay. I can't. It's college policy. If I do, I lose my job, period. I don't want this...I don't." Brendan says, sniffs sharply.

Ste wiped away a stray tear he couldn't fight back."Can ya not be in teacher mode and just be the man I met?"

"I am still the man ye met. Come on, what would ye have me do? I gotta work. Look, I'll still see ye in class" Brendan spoke pathetically, wincing at his stupid choice of words. There was nothing he could do.

"I know ya gotta work, but why here ey?! I love seeing you, an I know you feel the same. Just... just let me come round tonight. I won't stay long I promise..." Ste feels the twist in his stomach give him the worst pain he'd had in a long time. He could also see the desperate apology in Brendan's eyes _"It's not fair"_

Brendan hesitated moving closer, held his hand briefly to Ste's face, meeting their foreheads. Brendan's eyes were closed but Ste kept his open to watch.

"This is the way it has to be" Brendan held his breath, voice faltering. He edged past and strode away leaving Ste stood alone and feeling hollow.


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you for all your kind reviews and messages for this story. xx

* * *

The Boy Next Door

Part 4

Ste moped about when he returned home, a feeling of emptiness engulfing inside him he wanted desperately to scrub away. He moved inside his room and perched at the window. Through the glass he could see Brendan's home, it was dark inside, no lights on in the lounge. Ste knew Brendan wasn't home yet, his car hadn't been parked there when Ste had walked past from the bus shelter.

As Tony's voice echoed around the house announcing grub was up, the pleasant smell of food wafted through the door. He wasn't hungry though, Ste wanted to wallow in his own self pity for as long as possible. A good half hour passed by before it was Amy who eventually tapped on the door and entered carrying a tray of food. She left it on the side and sat down next to Ste on his bed. The motion of it had Ste tilting his head a little to the side. Amy's hands rested on her knees while her eyes darted cautiously at Ste.

"You've heard" Ste says, he can sense Amy's knowledge through her body language. The whole world knew didn't they.

"Uh huh, yeah love. Rae mentioned who turned up in English class." Amy stoic with her reply gazed back at Ste. The silence between them felt blown out of proportion as Ste's sadness infected the space around them.

"Tutors aren't allowed to have relationships with their students, did ya know that too? We're not even _together._ " Ste spoke spitefully, his hands moving aggressively in front of him.

"I kept thinking...no, this is stupid right. Cos we're both adults here. So I checked it out, you wanna know the real screw up?" Ste asks with a gruff voice, turns to look at his friend. "If I was at a different college, it would be okay!" Ste laughs as he sniffs, wipes his eyes on his sleeve.

"Oh Ste. You were just getting started though, wasn't you?" Amy kept her voice low, holding out a comforting hand to Ste's. "You were gonna be together and I know how much he means to you"

"I don't think you do though. I keep...one minute I'm angry at him then the next..." Ste shakes his head aimlessly, releasing a big sigh. "How can I get around this"

"Wish I had the answer for you. Ste, why was he even at our college?"

"Supply teacher init, they go everywhere, that's the point. I went to the headmasters office to try and sort things, cos my head were all over the place. I stood outside of it for ages wanting to go in there an tell him to stick his college. How can things change so quickly?"

"He's the bloke who lives next door – that's all. You shouldn't be so hung up over him. Look, perhaps...perhaps this is for the best. You can spend more time with us, you'll have tons of coursework to do. Keep your mind occupied yeah?" Amy nods reassuringly, she can see her words aren't getting through though.

"But..."

"No buts, trust me. You have just got used to his company, so will feel weird. Come on, there's plenty more fish in the sea, there's tons more Brendan's out there"

Ste shook his head "You're wrong." Ste darted his gaze to the window again. "There ain't no one like him"

* * *

Brendan stood outside of Anne's house, he'd gone straight there after spending what seemed like an eternity gazing out of his windscreen in the school car park. His friend finally answers the door, sees Brendan held up with an arm against the door frame.

"I couldn't trust myself not to go and see him Anne. It's what we do" Brendan says, lost expression on his face.

Anne sighed heavy. "Did you end it?"

Brendan nods his head before letting it heavy against his chest. "I am such a fucking idiot. It almost killed me seeing Steven like that, why couldn't ye just tell me?!"

"Excuse me, what? Me?! Hey I only found out at the last minute too, checked your post recently? No, because all you've had time for is pretty college boy!"

"That's below the belt Anne!"

"Apologise, else ya ain't setting foot in my home" Anne grimaced, finger pointing in anger. Brendan shakes his head and leans to one side.

 _"Sorry"_

"Sarcastic, but I'll take it. And I'm sorry too, I would have told you if I'd known Ste was a student there, I promise" Anne nodded silently, kept Brendan's blue eyes locked with her own until he held out his arm and she fed into Brendan's warm frame. He kisses the top of her head and slides past in to the house. She closes the door and follows him through to the lounge. Anne watches Brendan fall disgracefully onto her sofa and lie back pinching his fingers to the bridge of his nose. He peers from behind his other hand, the one covering his eyes to see her stood tall above him, eyebrows raised and hands on hips.

 _"What?"_ Brendan felt irritable.

"You that's what. Snap out of it Brendan, I know you liked him but this is...well it's plain weird. I have never seen you like this in all the years I've known you. Just...just pull yourself together"

"Wow. Yeah, that is damn helpful, your pep talks are getting _shitter_ by the way" Brendan scoffs, watching Anne bow as she walks away.

His hand slaps back over his eyes, the thoughts racing around his head are driving him crazy. He feels his phone dig into his chest so he retrieves it and flicks through the pictures. Brendan has a handful on his phone, wasn't exactly renowned for being snap happy. Anne had taken one of him in a 'grump' she'd said upon taking the photo and sent it to his phone. Another was one of his children he'd taken not long before leaving Dublin. Scrolling through to a similar photo of him and Cheryl as kids and Brendan smiled as he looked at them, all meaning something to him. The last few were of Ste, the one when he'd pinched him. His face was a picture, mouth wide and affronted, Brendan chuckled and swiped across to the other one of them laughing. His thumb traced down Ste's face, laughter making him seem even younger, including himself.

"You guys look so happy" Anne spoke lowly as she settled down to her knees on the floor next to Brendan. He passed her his phone when she'd reached to hold it. Brendan turned to watch her look at the picture.

"When was this taken, looks recent" Anne captures Brendan's eyes, her expression on of surprise.

"It was, a couple days ago. Before I went to see Chez. _God I wish I'd known_ "

"Hang on a minute, would you honestly go back and change things? Both of you chose to spend all that time together, means something doesn't it?" Anne says as she passes Brendan back his phone. "He made you laugh _"_

"Well, he looks funny" Brendan chuckles with her. "I'm a coward for doing that to him today" Brendan breathes through his nose and flicks his eyes up. "There has to be a way around this, surely"

"I was curious after seeing you two in the corridor, after I realised the implications. There isn't a lot about it online actually. From what I can gather, the student teacher rules still apply. If you were somewhere else, there wouldn't be a problem. At the same college, well he is technically an adult...but it's frowned upon. And more than likely you'd lose your job and have a black mark against you. This is one really bloody complicated mess you've gotten into"

"I said help meee, not make things worse" Brendan exasperated, both his hands covering his face he growled loud into them. "I'm not as ungrateful as I sound"

"No worries, I have known ya a long time. Your moods put mine to shame" Anne rounds quickly, finger raised to pause Brendan's backlash "However...I do feel bad for you. Both of you. I promise I will keep thinking. Have you asked for a move?"

Brendan nods heavy. "Yep, Mr Blake wasn't too pleased. It won't happen anytime soon though. Can I crash here? It's not fair me going back so soon after..."

"Stay as long as you need. I'd keep away from Ste at college unless it's in a teaching capacity, just for now at least"

* * *

Rae sits in English with Ste a couple of weeks later and each time they're in this lesson Brendan and Ste are both distracted and it's always by each other. Rae carries the weight of her chin in her upturned palm and watches Ste continue to gaze at Brendan talk in class and go through the text of the book the students are reading. Rae suspects Ste has barely touched his, her eyes capture his fingers fiddle with the pages.

"Hey, you gonna read that?" Rae spoke trying to awaken Ste from his spell.

"I've started to dream about him" Ste replied quietly, his eyes blinked looking down at the book in front of him.

"You're sleeping again?" Rae asked quizzically her hand tugging Ste's wrist so he'd look at her.

"No. It's still broken but, now I just remember my dreams when I do an it is always his face I see."

"You miss Brendan's company, normal considering the amount of time you spent together. It will get better Ste"

"How often are ya gonna say that and finally be convinced?" Ste sighed turning back to watch Brendan again. "I know he'll think about me, you can see it in his eyes. The way he looks at me, but neither of us know what to say"

"There's nothing to stop you talking Ste, I bet he misses that most you know? I mean he's always looking, if the class ain't worked it out they're all blind. Might not be of any help, but you finish in a year"

"Ya think I'd wait that long though?" Ste asked as he looked into his friends eyes.

"Yeah, I think you would. I think he would too" Rae gestured to Brendan who'd been looking over at them. He quickly swallowed and darted his view elsewhere. Ste nibbled gently against the inside of his mouth.

* * *

October

The canteen is busy at lunchtimes and is the reason Ste tries to avoid the place preferring the grounds of the campus. Today it's lashing with rain at the windows, the noise drumming at the glass and leaving him put out. He sits down at one of the tables where his friends are sat at, all smiling and greeting him as he does. Ste picks at his home made butties - ham and tomato. He just can't find an appetite for them so nibbles at it, pulls the sandwich apart destroying it completely. Ste sighs as he scrunches up the mess into the silver foil wrapping. Doug, who has witnessed the process, passes Ste a bottle of water and tries to cheer him up with a gentle smile.

"Here, try not to get mad with it, yeah?"

Ste meets Doug's gaze with a hint of a smirk, takes the drink with a gracious nod. "Ta, just not hungry I guess"

"When you've things on your mind it's hard to find the need to eat. Drink that, least fill up on something"

Ste gulps down the water, and he can feel the bob of his throat as he does. It quenches the thirst he didn't realise he'd had. As he tips his head straight, Ste's line of sight caught another. One that had been watching him. Ste flinched a little, droplets over spilling at the corner of his mouth. His fingers slowly caught the wet and brushed it away, Ste still connecting Brendan's eyes as he did. More weeks had passed by and this hadn't been the only time they'd found each other across a room, stolen moments like these had become precious to both of them.

As the room seemed to silence around Ste, conversations that filled the canteen became distant and instead it was the two of them just staring. Brendan flicked his gaze down lower, to the table Ste was sat at and on instinct the younger boy did the same. He hadn't felt anything, any warmth from it, but the hand that lay there was real covering his own. Ste quickly pulled back from Doug's grip, yanked his arm free but it was too late, Brendan had already turned to leave, hands sliding into his pockets, the dark rimmed glasses he wore almost disguising the man he knew. The way he acted now, they could almost be strangers and it hurt Ste. Brendan bowed his head as he wandered off turning Ste's hurt to grow into an anger. He glanced at Doug accusingly, but his friend was oblivious to what he had done. Ste wanted to yell at him for giving Brendan false witness to something innocent and certainly not reciprocated.

"You should come out sometime Ste, seriously. It would keep your mind on something else, it's not like you're gonna change things is it? With Mr Brady I mean and he ain't the only guy out there Ste"

"I can't change things?" Ste repeats half in a daze, he looks up at Doug who smiles at him. And the look in his eyes is explanatory. _Obvious._ Ste could have kicked himself for not thinking about it sooner. No wonder Brendan had acted the way he had. Ste gulped heavy and nibbled absently at the corner of his mouth. "Ya really want to go out, with me I mean?"

Doug's eyes widened, his head leveled out quickly leaving him to smile. "Well, yeah. I like you Ste..."

"Doug, I can't promise you anything...it's, I still..." Ste panicked then, didn't want to give out the wrong signals. "You know I still like Brendan, don't you?"

"I know. I understand. Just a drink, right? Do you like to dance?" Doug's voice grew higher.

"Clubbing" Ste thought a moment, he clocked Anne as she walked into the canteen and leaned against the counter to order some food. Ste sat up eyes darting back to Doug. "Yeah...yeah a club. We can all go, a place that's popular. I'll be back in a minute" Ste said, he slid out of his chair and moved over to Anne.

"Miss Minniver?" Ste tapped Anne lightly on the shoulder.

"Yes?" Anne asked turned around and smiled to see Ste stood behind her. "Hello again, Steven isn't it"

"Um, only Bren...I mean Mr Brady calls me that" Ste looked down at his fidgeting hands. "I wanted to ask you, how is he?"

"He's quiet mostly. He wishes things were different. We talk when he's awake, at least when he answers my calls"

"Like we did you mean. You're lucky to even see him"

Anne glanced around gingerly. "You know he hadn't a choice, but I promise this is the last thing Brendan wants"

"I know, honestly. Anyway can't keep moping around, and I gotta try and move on"

"What?" Anne's voice is monotone. "What do you mean?"

"Well, gonna start going out again. Let my hair down" Ste turns to look back at Doug and he knows Anne's eyes follow suit. She releases a short gasp of breath, it's quiet but enough Ste hears it. "He asked me out, and it's not like Brendan will bother now. He'll want me to get on with things...won't he?"

Ste turns to look at Anne, her eyes are stunned and for a moment she's quiet trying to think on her feet. "So, we're gonna go to that club, you remember the one right? You and Brendan go there sometimes"

 _"Occasionally_... Are you serious Ste? You're gonna go out with Doug? I mean, he seems a lovely bloke, but not very... _you_ is he?"

"Compared to who? Brendan? Who is so _very_ me?"

"Well, _yeah"_ Anne chuckles. "Forget I said anything, you go have fun. When are you thinking of going?"

"Weekend, Saturday night probably. Come along if ya want, there will be a few of us going"

"Oh to be young again" Anne grins. "Actually I still enjoy letting my hair down, so I may turn up and hopefully not embarrass you all"

"Brendan was like that too, you guys can't be that much older than me"

"Well we haven't hit thirty yet, but Brendan is getting there. Don't tell him I told you though!"

"I told im he were a dinosaur" Ste says, honking out his laughter. Anne gasps mockingly as she leaves the canteen.

* * *

Anne was sat at one of the tables in the staff room with a cup of coffee held high in her hand flicking through pages of a magazine another staff member had left behind. She glances up and smiles upon seeing Brendan walk in. He holds his hand out to Anne when he passes and she squeezes tentatively, moves to stand with him at the window and gazes down onto the grounds of the college.

He sees Ste then, the same as he always does at this time in the morning, it's the time the younger boy arrives each day into the college. Brendan had worked it out and made sure he saw him each time every day he was here. Walking with Amy through the grounds, they stop and begin to have a conversation, long enough for Brendan to smile. Anne watches Brendan then flicks her eyes down, heaves a sigh.

"Well I know she won't float ya boat unless you've suddenly switched sides, in which case I'd have expected to be first in line." Anne beams when Brendan looks up unfazed.

"Sorry, trying to lighten the mood." Anne raises her hands. "It's Ste of course. The one who looks the same as you do, both a pair of face aches."

"Well how positively selfish of us, give Steven a detention shall I" Brendan drawls leaving Anne with a vacant expression.

"Funny. And you'd relish giving him one - detention that is. So, who's the young lad there with Ste then?" Anne points down into the yard, eyes glancing to her side sheepishly. She knew exactly who it was, and curious Anne kept her eyes fully on her friend. Brendan watches Doug find Ste and they're smiling and laughing. He suddenly feels wound up and it consumes him.

"That's _Douglas_ , I've noticed him hanging around. He has nothing to stop him now does he"

"Doug...oh yeah, thought the name rung a bell. Ste mentioned him the other day" Anne purposely gazed out the window as the heat seemed to soar at the side of her. Without looking, Anne knew Brendan's interest had piqued. "They're gonna go clubbing apparently, remember the one I had to drag ya butt too? Yeah, that one. Reckon he's finally got the message though Brendan, which is good...isn't it" Anne finished and turned to gaze up at Brendan. His eyes were the wildest blueberry in colour. It excited her, the passion he had for Ste, she saw it in his eyes that evening when he'd turned up at her door. Whenever he spoke of him.

"He's doing what?" Brendan splutters his words, looks back at them together and all _'close'_. Brendan sneers. "Is this some kind of joke Anne, cos it ain't funny"

"No joke. I've been invited along too. You know how I love a good dance" Anne sways her body but stops abruptly seeing Brendan's face. "Look, you just have to deal with it, you told him it was over."

"Yeah but _Douglas?_! Come on!"

"Erm, yeah but _anybody_ more like! You'd hate any man going near!"

 _"Yes I bloody would!"_ Brendan shouts startling himself as well as Anne.

"Brendan do you want him to just stop living? It's a night out, they ain't pledging undying love." Anne watches Brendan huff away from the window, he makes it to the door before halting his feet.

"Anne, did Steven tell ye this himself?" Brendan asks, turns back his head to look at his friend.

"Yes love, he did. Ste also asked about you, that being the reason he'd spoken with me in the first place."

* * *

Ste is outside within the grounds of the campus because he prefers to spend his lunchtimes here, tall oak trees are doted around within a large area of lush green lawns and benches to sit on. The crunch of orange, red and brown leaves could be heard underfoot along the winding concrete pathways giving access to the various departments. The air had a frosty chill to it as students bustle around the place having lunch and chatting among themselves. Ste is by himself leaning back against one of the sturdy tree trunks, the oak tree here still provided shade with a few of its leaves still clinging to the branches. He angled his head back elongating his neck and relaxed in the Autumn sunshine.

"Ye and Douglas looked _cosy_ the other morning" Brendan speaks carefully against Ste's ear, thick northern Irish accent that has Ste shivering in goose bumps.

Ste jerks forward as the older man purposely breathes down his neck, gets this close again. Ste hadn't spoken to Brendan in weeks, spent his days with his friends and trying to put the existence of Brendan to the back of his mind. It hadn't been an easy task and a lot of the time he'd felt lonely without his companion. Knowing how it could affect Brendan's job, Ste had stayed away. Brendan was stood next to him now, body almost curving to his, Ste suddenly felt the hidden desires resurface again.

"Shouldn't of been looking then. Should ya" Ste replied, agitation clear in his words. Ste sighed as he glanced to the sky. He could hear the steady breathing Brendan produced and Ste turned to look at him, both of their expressions faltering and smiling at each other without thought. The urge Ste had to reach out to hold him was strong but the threat of whoever could see loomed around them.

"How could I not see. Up for it was ye?" Brendan asks, bitterness poisoning his words. Ste stood there, head shaking incredulously.

"Gonna stop ya right there mate. None of your business remember? Jealous were you, _only that ain't allowed"_

"Well let's see, that's how ye planned it didn't ye?" Brendan moved a step nearer to Ste, lets himself tower more above him. He can smell his hair, the shampoo in it, a light tinge of the aftershave he's wearing. Brendan doesn't hide he's more than content being this close to Ste whose cheeks begin to shade pinker.

"Dunno what ya mean"

"Don't ye?" Brendan lowers his voice, angles his head to one side. "Why else mention it to Anne, because I'd be the first to find out that's why. Ye knew that Steven"

"Hasn't made a difference though, has it?" Ste bent down to retrieve his bag, takes a last look at Brendan before he's off walking away.

"Didn't take ye long" Brendan says, slides his hands into his trouser pockets and watches Ste stop. Brendan inhales a deep breath, crunches the leaves beneath his shoes into the ground. "Douglas clicked his fingers and ye were all too willing"

Ste felt his betrayal stab at him hard, his heart crashing into the pit of his stomach. Ste threw his bag down at the ground forcing the leaves to jump and scatter. Ste turns to look at him. "That's not true and I resent you saying it! Don't make this my fault!"

"I can't change things Steven, but maybe I could find a way to get over it like ye have"

"Just stop it, you know how gutted I am about us. Okay, so Doug asked me out but it ain't a big deal. At least he acts like he wants my company"

"I'm here aren't I?"

"He's a friend, an I need that right now" Ste sighs and gazes down at his feet.

"Like I was ye mean" Brendan says, his feet continue to step further forward until they're in close proximity again. Brendan eyes around them conscious of where they are, in the open of the college grounds.

"He is nothing like you. Only you're the one I can't have, so stop punishing me right"

 _"I don't like it"_ Brendan whispers, his words drifting as he looses himself inside Ste's eyes. Brendan grips Ste's arm and walks them back under the shade of the large oak tree, it's branches creating a lot more shelter.

"I don't like the situation we have to live by, but deal with it Brendan cos I've had too. I'm not gonna stop talking to my friends"

"That's not what I meant. Ye wanted a reaction, well this is me making it clear. He likes ye Steven"

"Well I like _you_ don't I? So he's shit outta luck, as I am. Lesson over is it now? Glasses" Ste says, pointing to them still on Brendan's face.

Brendan glances around them, its incredible nobody heard their words. The older man removes his glasses and plays idly with the frame. "I'd left a class when I saw ye here. Came straight over and forgot I was even wearing them"

"Is it just for reading then? I never saw ya wear them during the holidays"

"Just reading. You're not gonna tell me I'm getting old now are ye?" Brendan smiles as Ste shakes his head.

"Of course I'd probably already know that if ya hadn't cut me off. In fact Bren, shouldn't you back off. Don't want ya getting into trouble ey" Ste snaps again, blinking back to reality.

"Ah Steven, won't work with me. I enjoy your feisty side. Don't ye ever think, this is what I want."

"Shame you're too gutless to do owt about it." Ste sighs, looks up with softer eyes at Brendan. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that"

Brendan wanders over to a bench and sits down on it hard, his eyes flick up to Ste before he joins him, sits so their thighs can touch. They both look at each other and with the same level of sadness within their eyes.

"This feels so weird, like I'm in trouble or somet. We may as well be together, we argue enough" Ste scoffs and has Brendan laughing

"Best bit about that is when we make up again. And you're not in trouble. I'd have to keep ye back after class" Brendan chuckles, thin smile on his face.

"Might end up the only way we can see each other at this rate" Ste offered, but Brendan's refusal to play leaves Ste leaning forward on his knees to gaze out on the other students wandering around.

"You suit them glasses Brendan. They make you look..."

"Fit?" Brendan asks curiously.

"Was gonna say distinguished" Ste bites his lip to stop grinning.

"Course ye was" Brendan nods in agreement, smiles softly. His eyes appreciating Ste more and more.

Ste suddenly leans in closer, checks around them. "No one's watching, how about you kiss me like you want too. Like you've thought about every day I've caught ya looking. You can have me against this tree here, I know the thought of it does things to you because it does to me too Brendan"

"Steven, don't tempt me" Brendan places himself just behind Ste's ear, keeps a look out around them before whispering "Nothing would give me greater pleasure, but ye know asking your tutor to pucker up, is frowned upon"

"Spoilsport. Better stop looking at my mouth that way then." Ste pulls back and sweeps his eyelashes high, their eyes firmly on each other. "I won't give up ya know"

"I'm kinda counting on that"

"Well this was fun while it lasted" Ste says, he jumps up to his feet "See you around _teech_ "

* * *

Monday morning there's a few teachers gathered in the staff room when Brendan arrives, there for a staff meeting during the lunchtime break Brendan's face is like thunder as he finds the place at the back of the room by an open window. He needs the air as the place is continuing to stifle him. Anne wanders in with another man, smaller than she is thanks to her high heels towering her above him. Anne smiles as she slaloms her way through and over to Brendan. The older man has a smile for her but her friend gets the brunt of his mood.

"Brendan, play nice" Anne says through gritted teeth, she bares them all to Brendan and then the man stood by her. "This is Mr McQueen, he's been brushing me up on my Biology. Thought I knew it all!"

"Hmm, surprising ye ever miss a trick Anne" Brendan says, his eyes slant over the new teacher. "Biology huh?"

"Yeah, better than some subjects isn't it? I'm John Paul by the way, Mr McQueen a bit formal. And your name is Brendan?"

"Mr Brady actually. I like formal." Brendan shifts his eyes down the length of John Paul and takes a deep sigh before pulling Anne to one side.

"So, how was the club?" Brendan asks, shifting on his feet waits patiently for his friend to speak.

"What, how many ways am I to tell this story? How many ways is there possible?" Anne points her finger animatedly as she speaks.

"Anne, come on. Give me a break, did anything happen?"

"No. As I told you last night on the phone, they never snogged one another"

"Jesus"

"They just danced like everyone else in the club did. Funny that isn't it? Of all the places to dance, in a night club"

"Fine. I cannot talk to ye like this." Brendan replied and walked back over to John Paul who glared at them both confused. Anne licks her teeth as she beams at him.

"I forgot to mention Mr Grumpy pants" Anne turns her back to Brendan and swishes her hair in his face. "He is a bit tetchy at the moment... _love life"_ Anne whispers.

"Anne! Can ye please stop talking now?"

"Oh don't worry, we've all been there, done that. Worn the t shirt" John Paul laughs, Anne giggles too leaving Brendan quirking his eyebrow at them both. What was he even doing here.

"Listen, they're all gonna suggest us all going out, to one of the local pubs? Anyway you should come, both of you" John Paul gazes at Brendan. "All the staff do it, easier to talk about college work and time the annual Halloween do, or Monster mash as I call it. Always a right laugh"

"A right laugh? Dunno if Brendan could manage that then" Anne says, her quick wit going down like a lead balloon with her friend. _"Only kidding"_

"No, I am sure that isn't true. Bet you're always up for a bit of fun Brendan, I mean Mr Brady, sir"

John Paul thinks he's clever mocking Brendan and the older man sneers when he turns away, Anne however has that look on her face, the one that is scolding him into submission. "Fine! Fine, I will come with ye. Jesus owt for a quiet life ey"

"Brilliant, I can see you as a vampire, or actually no, a zombie. They're dead pale faced right?"

"What ye tryin to say, I am dead pale?"

"Well, fair skinned then. Although with that hair, maybe a werewolf?"

Anne laughs nervously and quickly places herself between them, hands on Brendan's solid chest. Shoves him slightly to get his attention. "Hey we have to work with these people, a little decorum perhaps?"

"You know I was only suggesting idea's right? Will see you both this evening then" John Paul smiles, eyes flicking up to Brendan who rounds his head suspiciously. He breaks their eyes as Patrick walks in and conducts the staff meeting.

* * *

Tony is pottering around the kitchen Saturday afternoon when he hears the distinct sound of a key in the door. He smiles when he sees Ste walk in from work. Giving him a dashed glance, Ste chucks his bag on the table with a dull thud on the wooden surface. Ste grunts a noise which Tony supposes is his way of a greeting, a lackluster attempt at any kind of interaction. Tony releases a short breath and wipes his hands over the apron he's wearing and joins Ste at the table. He looks at him, eyes down and saddened. He can feel the difference in him just by being in his company.

"Hey..." Tony says quietly, tries to engage Ste's avoidance. "Come on Ste, I hate seeing you like this. Why don't you come and help me in the kitchen?"

Ste continues to remain silent with his thoughts playing out on a loop in his head. It's wreaked and throbbing with over thinking. He's aware of Tony's presence and that he's talking to him, but his mind is so occupied with Brendan there's nothing else. Tony's hand reaches across the table, lays over Ste's fiddling, restless fingers.

"Oi, I know you're love sick, or heartbroken, whichever...still doesn't mean ya gotta ignore me"

"You wouldn't understand" Ste mumbles finally, fingers still moving under Tony's palm.

"Why wouldn't I? Think I ain't ever been in love Ste?"

"Not sure I've even had the chance to love Brendan. Reckon I'd have let myself though, fall for him"

"Have you ever told Brendan that?"

"No cause, it took us a while to get there. We never got started. When was you in love? You've never told me that" Ste spoke with an edge of sarcasm, but he was still out of the room, still miles away.

"You must remember Jacqui?"

Ste began to look up then, eyelids still slightly masking the full of his blue eyes. "Mr McQueen's sister? Thought that were a fling last year that fizzled out?"

"Yeah well, Jacqui dumped me. However she still likes me Ste, I have seen that look in her eyes"

"What, the one where she might actually attempt murder?" Ste speaks surprised, they both end up chuckling.

"Trust me Ste, Jacqui still has the old flame lit for me. Plus now I can chef as much as I can, I'll win her heart back properly."

Ste looks up fully now and considers Tony's words. "I never realised you liked her so much. Shoulda noticed more really. I hope it works out for you Tone, you deserve it. Shame I can't do the same."

"I know he still likes you. There's been times, mostly in the cafeteria because muggins here helps out, that I have seen him looking at you. That's not the face of a man who isn't bothered. In fact, I'll bet he is feeling just as bad as you are right now"

"What am I supposed to do ey? Just let him treat me like a stranger because he might still have feelings? It's so stupid. We're both adults!"

"I know that, everyone knows that. But he is your tutor, plain and simple. And you can get mad and stamp your feet. Argue till you're blue in the face, it won't change things. Instead you should be thinking constructively." Tony says with a wag of his finger, gets up and walks into the kitchen again. Ste follows him, takes his jacket off and hangs it on a chair back.

"Constructively how? There's a massive wall in front of us with 'rules' written on it."

"Go around the wall then" Tony shrugs, passes Ste an apron. "Here, I am gonna teach you a new recipe. You can make it for Brendan once you've both stopped acting like kids ey?"

"Why can't people just say what they mean instead of the cryptic messages. Shouldn't I just go through the wall?"

"Not if ya want a bust up nose you don't! You'll find a way, just, just be patient though. You two are gonna be alright, I know it. You still talk don't you?"

"Yeah, sometimes. We kinda argue too"

"Sounds like you're already a couple!"

"I know! I said that too. We're arguing cos we're not together" Ste says, he chuckles to himself then looks at the preparation area. "Right then, love this part. What's to be chopped chef?"

"Oo could get used to that, call me _'Chef Hutchison'_ "

"No" Ste shakes his head.

"Worth a try. Maybe we should make somet for the Halloween do? Hey there ya go! Talk to Brendan at the party? Everyone's going right?"

"Thanks Tone, dunno what I'd do without ya"

"That's what friends are for, now listen to this, because he'll love it." Tony winks and accepts the tight hug Ste gives him.

* * *

Ste pulled at the shirt collar around his neck, and licked against his new teeth for the night. They were sharp considering they were brought as as pretend. The point scraped across his tongue creating a smirk on his lips. He'd have fun biting jugulars tonight. And there was quite a few victims he could see within the crowd of people in the queue he lined up in.

Amy was a zombie, hair made up in such a way she looked as though she'd been pulled through a bush backwards. Her make up thick and wonderful, Ste agreed Amy looked the part. Rae was a witch dressed in a layered black and deep purple dress, they'd all shopped together and bought the costumes. Fake blood had never been so much fun to use, Amy was covered in it by the time they'd finished. Tony wanted to be Dracula but as Ste was already killing the part, he'd instead opted for Frankenstein's monster. Ste and his friends had laughed so much with the make up. They all looked half dead.

A tap on his shoulder has Ste turning around as Anne smiled dressed in her curve fitting cat suit.

"Wow. You look..."

"I know. It's incredible how I actually breathe. Don't ask me how I slipped into this, or in fact how I'll slip out of it. Know that my skin would never need Botox wearing this monstrosity. By the way, let me know if Batman is about, could do with sharpening my claws" Anne jokes and meows seductively.

"Ha ha, poor guy! Well ya look good. I think your night will be a social one."

"You too, looking fangtastic. I know at least one person who won't be able to keep his eyes off. Have you seen him yet? Looks the part, I helped wih it"

"Hang on, Brendan actually joined in? Can't wait to see him then"

"He said the same about you" Anne said, she soon found herself distracted though as Doug appeared next to her looking like a Egyptian mummy. She coughed to stop herself from laughing. Ste bit against his bottom lip and smiled

"Doug, what happened to you?"

"What? I'm a mummy aren't I? Meant to be in bandages"

"Okay I get that, but where are your eyes and mouth? Can ya even see?"

 _"I double dare ya to turn him around five times and let him go. See what happens"_ Anne whispers into Ste's ear. He chuckles and nudges her playfully.

They're all interrupted by the line moving, and they soon fill the large night club up. Inside it's almost black with darkness, the room littered with scary decorations, fake cobwebs and thin lengths of string hung from the ceiling that touch faintly along your face. The odd screams indicate a few people have fallen fowl of the trick as it makes them jump. The bar staff are all dressed as skeleton's, each with a permanent grin for the night. Champagne is on offer with a complimentary fake eyeball floating within the glass and spiders swim inside the deadly fruit punch bowl.

While the Halloween theme continues with the music, Ste is busy looking around the large dance floor, he's searching but with each person dressed up like a character from Transylvania hotel, he'll be hard pressed to recognise anyone. Ste sees Doug again and quickly mingles within the crowd to remain unseen a while longer, standing at the bar and managing to get himself a beer, he sits and drinks.

Amy and Rae come over a good while later, they both drag at his arms to get him up. "Come on lightweight! You've not danced yet! There's some games to play, stabbing for apples, kiss me sick and there's a prize for best costume!" Amy says, shrill in her voice. Ste rolls his eyes as he's dragged onto the dance floor. The music blares out 'Thriller' and the floor becomes a sea of dancing zombies. Ste grins along with the others, and dances in line with everyone else.

* * *

Ste manages to wander off again and finds his way over to the bar. Waited for some service as yet again the place was busy with louder customers, ones who could get the bartenders attention easily. Part of him gave up, and just continued to people watch as Frankeinstien's monster hooked up with Morticia Adams. Ste beamed at Tony who gave him the thumbs up as he led Jacqui to dance.

"Swear I fancy the Grim Reaper!" Amy appears at Ste's side giddy as a kipper.

"Ey?" Ste replies confused until she points to a tall guy, he waves his syife and smiles awkwardly.

"He's called Simon and he's gorgeous!" Amy coos looking back at Ste. "Hey, why so glum? Has he not arrived yet?"

"Nope. I sat here in case like...Probably won't be bothered though"

"You know my feelings on this. But he makes you happy so I'm supporting you" Amy glances around. "Anne said he'd come, if he knows what's good for him he'll find you"

"Go dance, he's waiting for ya. Bloody odd seeing all the monsters dancing around" Ste smiles watching Amy enjoying herself, in fact all his friends were. Ste turned back at the bar and picked at the scary jellied sweets and bit the head off a bat chewing the strawberry flavour from it.

A presence behind Ste had his eyes flicking up, head angling around to his side. The warmth of another body engulfed the length of his from behind. Familiar smell of aftershave and a heat he instantly recognised.

"Ye look so good with fangs" Brendan says, his mouth gently brushes Ste's ear, his moustashe is soft and beard seems rougher. Ste cups his hand back and feels against the sharp prickles on his face and chin and turns around.

"Ya shaved?"

"Yeah, well I ain't ever seen a bearded zombie before. Kept the stubble though, everyone likes a bit of rough"

"Dead rough" Ste smiles, leaving his hand on Brendan a little longer so's to curl the tips of his fingers. "Ya look so fit"

"We even more so together." Brendan looked at the bartender and ordered two shots. Ste watched them line up on the bar with salt and lemons. Brendan edged forward and gave Ste his before taking the salt in his hand.

"Ever done a body shot Steven?" Brendan asked, his words filtered down Ste's ear.

"No"

"Me either. Suddenly curious though" Brendan lifts Ste's hand holding it flat to his own and tips salt on his wrist. Ste watches curiously, the grains slipping over his skin. As Brendan moves to dip down Ste's mouth slowly parts, eyes gently flicking up to Brendan who of course keeps his eyes fixed.

"Maybe I'll get the chance to find out one day."

Ste's breathing judders as Brendan licks off the salt from the pulse of his skin before downing his shot and sucking the lemon.

"You...you're takin a risk there aren't ya? Anyone coulda seen"

"Too dark in here to see owt and besides, ye weren't complaining, notched up your heart rate didn't it?" Brendan winks and turns to leave.

"Oi, where ya going? Ain't had mine yet" Ste holds up the lemon to Brendan's lips.

"Suck" Ste demands playfully, watches Brendan smile in acceptance before sucking noisily at the citrus fruit, Ste quickly licks the salt, finishing off the tequila. Brendan latches his mouth to Ste's before he can think about it and the heavy motion almost knocks Ste off the bar stool. With them both unsteady, Brendan's arm secures around Ste's waist holding him in place as he leans above Ste. Brendan presses their mouths together arching back Ste's neck while he sucks the lemon leisurely from his tongue.

"Hmm" Ste's smile is cunning and playful. Becomes bold as he relaxes comfortably in Brendan's company. "That were dead crafty, considering how public this place is. Thought the voice of reason says _"way it's gotta be'"_

"So very droll. Shouldn't ye go back to Douglas, reckon he'll be searchin, for ye behind all those bandages. Likes to follow ye around doesn't he, bless."

"Going a lovely shade of green there Bren. I can never understand jealousy me. Never get affected by it myself"

"Never. Well that's neither of us then"

Ste widens his eyes skeptically. "And okay, so he went overboard with them bandages..."

"Overboard?" Brendan interrupts, quirks his eyebrow at Ste who still has his mouth open to speak. "It looks like he's in a body cast Steven and could probably double a snowman this winter. All he needs is a carrot and boom"

"You and Anne are as bad as each other"

"Why, what did Anne say?"

"Well she said...never mind. Stop it" Ste says with a chuckle, head shaking he points to one of the tall bar stools. "Join me? I doubt anyone will care if we prop up the bar together. Promise to bite...a lot"

"Me too" Brendan agrees cocking his leg up over a stool opposite Ste, his knee fits between Ste's legs sliding them apart, elbow on the top of the bar so he can lean as close to Ste as possible. The younger boy smiles and feels pulled in by his gaze, head resting against his hand.

"Don't make it obvious do ya?"

"Not sure what you're insinuating, I just like to be in close proximity with ye. Maybe it's those vampyric eyes of yours, hypnotising me"

"If that were true, you'd be a lot closer to me than this" Ste speaks bashfully as the colour in his cheeks rose brighter to the surface. "In fact, you'd be inviting me back to yours tonight"

Brendan lets out a low laugh turning to the bar. "Are ye gonna keep the costume on if I do?"

He could hear the slight embarrassment in Ste's laughter and it reminded Brendan how much he'd missed spending time with him. The pair of them were visibly content like this. Brendan gestures to the one of the staff and orders another beer for Ste.

"Could definitely be arranged" Ste replies, taking hold of the beer on the bar and gulping it down his throat. "You not having another drink too?"

"Designated driver, said I'd have the one so I'll just ply ye with it instead"

"Are ya wanting me tipsy Brendan?" Ste grins around the neck of the beer bottle before taking a swig of it.

"Just wanting ye full stop Steven"

"Hiya Brendan" John Paul's presence breaks them up with a jolly voice, slides his feet across the floor and bumps into Brendan with a grin. Slowly the older man turned away from Ste, the task brought on harder by his perfect glow of pink when flirty. He could almost smell the pheromones bouncing off of him. Brendan edged closer to Ste.

"Nice to see you made it. Oh hello Ste, didn't see you there...you two know each other?" John Paul says, tries to gain a response from Brendan who just looks at him blankly.

"Hmm, ye could say that"

"We're neighbours aren't we Bren" Ste admits proudly to an uninterested John Paul who more or less placed his back towards Ste.

"We are indeed" Brendan agreed and gestured to the red suit the other man wore. "Sharp red suit ye got on there"

John Paul gazed down at his costume suit, light chasing fork in his hand and matching horns on his head. "You think so? Thanks, meant to be the devil"

Ste's mouth curled into a grimace as Brendan watched on with interest. "A bit flashy though" Ste remarked with a huff.

"Well yours is a bit dated, Dracula? Everyone's done that"

"Yeah well at least I look good in this" Ste snapped wanting to shove that stupid light up fork where the sun don't shine. "I've even had offers to keep it on long after I leave"

"To help you fly away no doubt" John Paul counters, his eyes challenging.

Brendan clears his throat loudly.

"So, enjoying the party? Can I get ye a drink perhaps?" Brendan asks, he can see Ste shoot a look at him, but he keeps John Paul in his sights now. The warmth against his skin almost electrifies bouncing off the sudden heat radiating from Ste. Brendan's heart beat thumps hard within his chest and can't help but wonder how fast Ste's is now racing.

"Um...maybe later. How about a dance? You won't mind me stealing Mr Brady away will ya Ste?"

Brendan smirks as Ste's jaw almost hits the floor, eyes darkening with jealousy that apparently Ste never gets like. Brendan cannot help the mischievous side from coming through so he finishes his drink and stands up, gestures for John Paul to go on ahead. Ste is up on his feet then too.

"Hey, what d'ya think ya doing?" Ste asks, folds his arms like a vice against his chest.

"Well, gonna go dance"

 _"With him?_ Why are ya interested in _that_ all of a sudden?" Ste almost chokes on his words. _"Sharp suit_...never realised ya even knew each other"

"We work together, ye must know the biology tutor by now surely" Brendan says and keeps his eyes half lidded leaning over to Ste's ear. "What ye bothered about, It's alright for ye and Douglas, ye won't begrudge me either, right?"

 _"Brendan..."_ Ste widens his mouth as he watches Brendan move out onto the floor and dance like a pro. It hurts him, and it angers him. Brendan doesn't take his eyes off Ste the whole time he's out there intrigued with Ste and his reactions.

"What's going on with you two now?" Anne spoke surprising Ste to break his gaze with Brendan. "Why can't ya just pack it in with the stupid games"

"This wasn't me. Brendan made up the rules, I just follow them. Mr McQueen seems very cosy don't he"

"Hmm, Brendan didn't seem keen when I introduced them other day"

"Hang on, as in, on purpose?"

"Wh...well I thought it might take his mind off...hold on...Ste"

"Thought you were on my side, our side. Instead you're giving him ideas!" Ste huffed away from her feeling perplexed, his eyes wandered back to the dance floor.

"No, no this is all for you Ste" Anne explains pointing to Brendan and John Paul. "And I'd be the first to say go over there, sort im out once and for all but...well It's not as _simple_ as that"

"What does he want, me to admit I'm jealous? It's pointless if i can't do owt about it"

"This is Brendan love, no one ever worked out his way of thinking. Perhaps he needs this, he hates the thought of you and Doug"

"There ain't never gonna be me and Doug. Not when I've already made my choice" Ste glares intensely at Brendan who slows down his dance steps. "Do me a favour, tell my friends I left early. I suddenly feel nauseous"

"Ste, wait... _oh"_ Anne blows out a tired breath and Brendan receives the brunt of it when she shoves him on the arm once he'd appeared by her side. "You, ya stupid! I oughta bang both your heads together!"

"What did _I_ do?!"

"Dancing? When have you _ever bloody danced_ , even with me? Your first one should have been with Ste! You plonker!" Anne exasperated and stomped off, heels clicking at the wooden floor before suddenly halting and returning once more. She stands with her eyes hidden behind heavy eyelids, tongue licking the dry of her lips wet.

"Actually I wasn't dancing with anyone but myself. There's a difference" Brendan says, his arms fold tight against his chest. "Ye forget something?"

"You're driving me home...so I apologise" Anne adds with a sharp nod to her head and swishes her hair before walking off _"Still a plonker"_

Brendan beams with laughter.

* * *

"Hiya, where did you slope off to during the party?" Doug asks, he sits next to Ste on a bench in the grounds of the college early Monday morning. Ste has his nose in the book Brendan has given his class to study. He's getting frustrated with trying to read the pages but he doesn't let on to Doug. Instead his smile is welcoming for his friend as he bundles up to give him some room.

"Oh that. Had a bad taste in me gob. Decided to leave"

"You missed a great night, loadsa fun and snogs. Got some sick kisses and that stabbing for apples was hilarious. I didn't win best costume though"

"Oh, why not?"

"Couldn't see properly to enter" Dough reveals with a grin, tries to make his friend smile and it works. Ste sniggers closing the book in his hand.

"Did Brendan win?" Ste asks absently, eyes looking at the sky and the clouds floating past.

"No, he was a wicked zombie though, shame you missed each other huh? Mr McQueen kept him company though to be honest."

"Really?" Ste felt his stomach drop knocking him queasy. Ste fiddled with his fingers. "All night?"

"Think so. Anyway, you disappeared at the weekend too. What was ya up to?"

"I was working. I've taken on more shifts lately, trying to save up. Need to get to get away from here"

"What for?" Doug asks interested, he leans back against the bench encouraging Ste to do the same.

"Don't laugh, I've never had a holiday anywhere. So I figured I could save and just go for a weekend. Even in the UK, there's loads of cool places here"

"Never? Well, that's a good idea then. America is a great place to travel. You could backpack somewhere, maybe with a friend?" Doug suggests, his gaze moves to Ste who looks visibly awkward. Ste licks his lips.

"I did plan to go with someone, once. Didn't work out because, well I never got chance to even ask. Won't ever happen now anyway. I'll just go on my own"

"You've always things on your mind lately, ever since I started here" Doug says, pats Ste on the shoulder.

"Yeah, been distracted. I'm kinda losing passion for this place now. My sleep pattern still sucks and it turns out I fancy my English teacher who is, of course, off limits thanks to a screwed up technicality. So all in all, a crap start to a new year" Ste sighs in frustration.

"You ain't the first to do that" Doug grins. "Maybe it's worked out for the best to be honest and saved you from getting in too deep right?"

"No, it's a big mess is what it is. Before his annoying moustashe turned up at my college things were going good between us. Is it possible to switch off ya thoughts, stop yourself from going mad?"

"If you put other things to the forefront of your mind then it is possible. You enjoyed going out the other night, instead of being holed up in your room all the time. Live a little more, let your hair down. Come out with me again" Doug almost whispers his words, can feel the nerves forming in his tummy. Ste looks up now, connects Doug's eyes. It's what he sees in them that worries him most.

"Jeez, wish I hadn't said owt now" Ste chuckles, tries to play down the atmosphere between them. "I appreciate it though. Maybe I will wanna go out again, once I've stopped moping about after Brendan Brady"

"Ah yes, Mr Brady. I remember him from the party at yours. Didn't know he was a tutor here, a little risqué of you two...ya know"

"He wasn't my anything Doug! That's the point. I wasn't aware he was gonna be here. I don't believe he'd not tell me and allow us to get close like we did. Brendan isn't a tutor to me, it's more than that. It was more"

"Still, at least you can both move on now. Get to see other people, it'll certainly help you stop going crazy won't it?"

"I won't be seeing anyone else. Doug, nothing will happen between us, you know that right?" Ste grimaces, looks back at Doug who seems altogether sheepish and aloof. "What?"

"I am only doing this for your sake. Because you can't see. I just heard a rumour that's all, Brady was seen with that McQueen tutor. It's probably nothing but they all go out together, the staff. Tommy in science was saying they all went out on a staff do, he works at the pub they drank in. Real cosy he reckons.. _Ste?"_

"I'll kill him" Ste jumps off the bench where he was sitting and punches his books into his bag swinging it on his shoulder. He's off walking before Doug can process what's happening.

"Who? Wait, Ste!" Doug grabs his things and races after Ste. "Are you mad, you can't do owt here! McQueen will press charges, have you arrested"

"I'm not bothered about _John Paul,_ who doesn't know his arse from his elbow by the way, considering he teaches Biology. I'm going to see Brendan. By the time I've finished, McQueen will be the last thing on his mind, believe me"

"Wait, what ya gonna do? Ste?!" Doug watches Ste quicken his steps into a jog leaving Doug to regret his words.


	5. Chapter 5

Thank you for the amazing reviews for this fic. xx  


* * *

The Boy Next Door

Part 5

Brendan is sat alone in his form room marking some work. He's feeling tired and as he sits there, the lids of his eyes heavy while he fights off the sleep he needs. Brendan eases his head back half dozing until the faint sound of footsteps in the corridor outside has his eyes opening. Assuming a teacher is about to enter the room he pivots his chair around from the desk expectantly. When Ste walks in his shock is evident leaving Brendan sitting up.

"So ye remembered where my classroom was finally" Brendan watches Ste scan the room before backing up against the door. "Thought I'd have to leave a trail of breadcrumbs at one point"

Ste just stares at him with wild eyes and bolts the door shut. "What are ye doing?"

Ste doesn't answer, no time for words. Ste needs to make a point and moves like lightning throwing his bag onto a desk. Saddling his legs either side of Brendan's lap, Ste's arms drape around his neck. Ste gives Brendan a quick moment to process before opening his mouth against his lips with a kiss.

Brendan can feel Ste's heart racing against his chest, the warm wet of his tongue lacing the inside of his mouth. It doesn't take Brendan long to react, give in and kiss Ste back with vigor and passion, hands lost within the short length of Ste's hair. Ste moans softly exploring the entire of Brendan's mouth, deepens his kiss. Ste gets his teeth into the action nipping the bottom of his lip and sucking the soft flesh hard. Brendan chases Ste's mouth when he breaks it off harshly rewarding him with a blushed response as he does.

"He'll never make you feel like this, the way I do"

 _"Who?"_ Brendan whispers, feeling slightly delusional. Brendan instinctively moves in for another kiss but Ste backs off.

"Mr McQueen that's who. Brushing up on your _biology_ are ya?" Ste shoves at Brendan's chest, scolds him with his words.

"Steven what the hell...ye come into my classroom, kiss me - inappropriately. And now what, accuse me of an affair?"

"How can it be an affair, if we're not together" Ste starts to move but Brendan's hands are already anchored firmly in place.

"Don't move boy. Why act like this now huh?"

"Who cares! I saw how ya were the other night anyhow. I knew he was up to somet at that party, which by the way, didn't see you stopping him either. How could you do that to me!" Ste wrestles with Brendan's arms that seem to tighten the more Ste struggles to get away. He's completely flush with Brendan's solid body by the time he huffs and has to give up.

"Isn't that a bit rich after ye and Douglas?" Brendan silences Ste's protests then, raises his eyebrows before relenting a little of his hold, allows Ste to breathe again.

"Care to explain what ye think ye know?" Brendan asks, his hands don't move feeling Ste is about to make an escape any moment.

"You were seen out together at a pub. All of the staff, don't deny it"

"I ain't denying it. I did go to the pub with ALL the staff. It was a boring lunch about the Halloween party for the college Steven, the one we ALL went to. I had no time for what ye are imagining. And John Paul? Give me some credit"

"No, cos you danced with him..."

"I've danced with a glass of whiskey in my hand if ye wanna make a big deal outta that too?"

"Brendan!"

"I just wanted to make ye realise what it feels like, if you'd stuck around you'd have seen me spend the rest of the night with Anne. Who told ye I'd been out with John Paul?"

"It were Doug" Ste reveals, gives in to a long breath.

"And there we have it. Shock of the century. Okay so...now I have to run it past ye before I go out, is that it?"

"Ya know what, this is doing my head in." Ste sighs, takes his hands to his face and rubs them down heavy. Ste looks at Brendan and he's as tired as Ste feels. He goes to shift again but in doing so feels just how close together they are leaving his embarrassment to flourish. Brendan watches Ste's reactions curiously taking it upon himself to curve full palms over his bum, pulls their groins solid together.

"Does that blush make ye all hot too?" Brendan says with a grin.

"Shurrup. Okay, so I may have been hasty" Ste swallows deeply and touches Brendan's wrists, thumbs the warm of his skin.

"Ye ain't kidding. Planned this did ye, on the way here to my classroom. Just to the hell with the consequences, dive on me without any thought process. I'd give ye full marks but we're supposed to be avoiding suspicion, not creating it"

" _Oh_ , bloody teacher mode! You're telling me off for this?!" Ste exasperates. "This is the best decision I've made in weeks. Noticed you didn't stop me kissing you. In fact, I'm feeling exactly how much you enjoyed me, Sir" Ste gently pulls off Brendan's glasses and places them on the desk at the side of them, focuses on his eyes before dipping down and sucking Brendan's bottom lip between his own. _"Don't send me away yet"_

 _"I'm not going too"_ Brendan husked, runs his tongue just inside of Ste's parting lips and offers a soft kiss. Ste shifts closer on instinct, hears the distinct moan leave Brendan's mouth.

"How are ya so calm about this? I'm proper messed up because I don't get to be with you anymore. Little things get blown out of proportion in my head an then I come here an make a fool of myself" Ste says, he runs his clasped fingers down Brendan's shirt collar, eyes flicking up to his.

"That's not true. I don't think you're foolish at all. And I'm just an old hand at hiding my true self Steven. Had plenty of practice."

"You even stopped coming into the coffee shop" Ste speaks saddened, surprises Brendan with the way he sounds so defeated. "It's bad enough not seeing you each night, but why not just come in for a drink like you used to"

"Hey" Brendan hooks his fingers below his chin and angles up his face. "Look at me, I am definitely not interested in John Paul. I wind ye up for the reaction. It was very risky coming in here, but I am glad ye did"

"Practicing constructive thinking. Better let go of me then, so I can leave."

Brendan strokes his fingers through Ste's hair and places a tentative kiss on his lips. _"Not just yet"_

Ste rests his forehead to Brendan's and strokes the back of his head, their eyes close to the silence of the room. When a noise distracts them Ste sighs with a slight tremble. "I don't want to give you up. Maybe if I left college"

"Not a chance am I letting ye do that. I would still turn ye away" Ste opens his eyes then, looks at Brendan. "Just continue your time here, forget about me. This is more important, now go."

* * *

November

Brendan made his way through to the head's office, pile of papers hooked under his arm, laptop bag in his hand. The older man dashed sideways through the sea of students to arrive at the office. Teresa gazed over her glasses pulling them down to just over the bridge of her nose to look at Brendan. He felt a little uneasy at the attention, her eyes boring a hole through him.

"Patrick is expecting me – can we hurry this along please?" Brendan sighed, jerking the mountain of papers under his arm. Teresa nodded and gracefully walked across to the door opening it. Her eyes drifted while Brendan had to suck in his body weight just to get past her.

"That'll be all Teresa" Patrick warned, his eyes piercing. "Just can't get the staff" Patrick mumbled, smirk against his lips. He gestured for Brendan to sit down.

"I guess not – look I don't mean to be rude but I need to get on. Loads of work to get through"

"Ah yes, I can see that. Funny how things change, seems like only yesterday you were wanting to leave. Anyway, I asked you in here about one of your students, a Steven Hay. What are your thoughts about him?"

Brendan swallowed and placed his files precariously on the desk. "Why is my thoughts about him relevant suddenly?"

"He's become unruly, not turning up to lessons. Mainly yours and he asked for English Lit. Seems very odd, don't you think?"

"No" Brendan's arms tightened across his chest, defining the muscle through his shirt sleeves. "He has a few issues, ye know. Personal."

"How are things with ye and Teresa? Wasn't she your student once?" Brendan added swiftly, sitting forward in his chair and surprising Patrick. His unease was obvious gazing back at the door.

Patrick slanted his eyes and studied Brendan many moments. "I help her occasionally yes, but there is nothing between myself and my secretary. Surprised you listen to the idle gossip that goes on around here, like the whispers about you and Mr McQueen for instance. The students like to talk you understand"

"I like to think my tastes are better than that"

"Is this going somewhere?" Patrick asks scornfully, leans forward to his desk. "Have you a point to make?"

"No...no. Going nowhere fast Blakey"

"You'll address me as Patrick or Mr Blake you got that straight? Excusing the pun, naturally" Patrick sniggered. Brendan's eyes darkened.

"Again, why am I here?"

"Mr Hay will be up in front of the student council and I wanted you to be there. We need to get rid of this time-waster now. He's had his chance – blew it. Plenty of others would pay to be in his place"

"And ye think I will help ye get rid of Steven? No chance, he needs to be here. It's important to him and he's doing well actually. All the work he's given in is a pass"

"Despite his dyslexia? You do know he has it yes?"

"Hey, enough with your tone. Yes I know, and so does Steven." Brendan angers, feels his heart rate notch up in speed with annoyance. "If ye knew anything about him, which it is pretty obvious ye don't, you'd know he doesn't like to talk about it but I have noticed and he manages it just fine"

"Commendable sincerity there, really. So then you'll be able to explain why hasn't he attended classes in recent weeks? And looking further into this, why haven't you done anything about it? Odd that"

"I've been...busy" Brendan closes his eyes. "I've let him down because I didn't want us caught out"

"Caught out? How do you mean Mr Brady?"

"I mean...I just knew. I knew he'd been skipping classes but I covered for him. Steven, he works hard and deserves a break."

"Unless you can give me a good enough reason, I'm left with little alternative" Patrick speaks determined.

"If you're asking me to vouch for Steven then I will be in his corner. Ye can't just give up at the first hurdle. Let me talk to him, I can bring him around."

"You are willing to do that for him, what about the work he's missed out on? He'll need extra help for which we haven't the resources. Already stretched enough for staff especially since the ones we do have ask to leave"

"Be assured, I'll get him back in regular classes, even the extra help. I've done what ye asked, waited months, what's happening with getting a replacement English teacher?"

"Ah that. Well, I have explained it takes time. These things cannot be processed overnight. Disruptive though, especially as the students are becoming used to your presence, teachings" Patrick says, eyes on the files he has on his desk but his ears are primed to listen.

Brendan can feel his head tighten, beginnings of dull ache forcing him to pinch the bridge of his nose. He'd be letting down the students by leaving and it just made him feel guilty. It was a tactic played cunningly by the headmaster dragging out his stay by months longer than Brendan had wanted and it was important to have stability with most things in life.

"Would it be better if I stayed the year, two years before I left? I'm a supply teacher, I come and go that's my job isn't it? I will stay until a replacement is found. I won't just abandon my classes, but Patrick...ye need to stop fobbing me off. I know what's been going on but your manipulation won't change my mind"

Patrick raises his eyebrows. "So you wouldn't consider a permanent position here if offered to you?"

"A permanent teaching position? I've never been asked before. Thanks but, my mind's made up." Brendan smiles tight lipped, retrieves his paperwork and laptop before leaving.

* * *

It's almost the end of the day when Brendan makes his way to the sports arena, goes inside and sits in the stadium part of the building. There's wooden benches the entire length of it on one side, rows upon rows high, he finds a place in the middle and waits patiently for the games going on to finish. Ste is there with his friends and once they're done they all move out to leave. Brendan stares enough until it's Tony who looks up first, sees Brendan perched there. A sight unfamiliar enough he lets on to Ste about it with a gentle nudge.

Eyes firmly on Brendan, Ste follows Tony's eye line and watches Brendan hold his hand up briefly in gesture. The younger boy obviously put out, tries to ignore him but Tony encourages Ste to clamber the seating area, enough so they're at a distance to speak. Ste huffs his arms tightly around his chest and gazes out into the sports hall, looks anywhere but at Brendan.

"How have ye been?" Brendan asks, more a way to break the thickening ice around them, atmosphere frosty with Ste's reception. Ste shakes his head incredulous.

"Good to see ye spending time with your friends, enjoying yourself" He says, eyes still on Ste who won't entertain him.

"Come on Steven. Give me a break and stop sulking for five minutes, I need to talk to ye about why you've stopped coming to my classes"

Still no response from Ste who languishes in his mood. Brendan can't blame him for it, he'd ignored Ste for weeks seemingly forgetting everything they'd shared. "Ye are behind on your work. I want to help ye catch up and mostly to convince ye to attend my lessons again"

"An why would I want to do that, ey? So I can sit there an pretend the whole time? Nah, don't think so. Now if you wouldn't mind, I need to get changed"

"I do mind actually. I mind the insolence coming out of that pretty mouth of yours."

"Yeah well this 'pretty mouth' ain't nothing to do with you anymore. An the hell ya even care. Why don't you go find John Paul and go study biology together. Might learn somet Sir."

"Jesus. I told ye nothing is going on. It's rumours created by morons who have nothing better else to do than cause drama and hurt for others. The kind of people who wake up and decide to do that, that isn't who I am"

"No but you're the kind to let me fall... _care_ for you and then walk away. Preach to someone else Brendan. I gotta go"

"Steven, wait..."

Ste skips back down to the hall floor and walks into the changing rooms. Brendan sits there a while, pinching the bridge of his nose and adding more lines to his forehead. This would be harder than he first imagined.

* * *

"Oh dear, do I need to buy some chocolate ice cream?" Anne stands in the doorway of Brendan's classroom, hands on hips watching Brendan lean back heavy in his chair. His mouth quirks as his shoulders shrug. Tosses the pen he's held in his hand the past half hour trying to mark work he can't read properly with his mind whirring.

"Maybe if it's a hundred proof whiskey Anne. Then I might be interested"

"Rum and raisin? No? Okay then." Anne walks in to the room and sits on a desk. "Tell me what's up"

"There isn't enough time in the day. Mr Blake wants to throw Steven out of the college because he's stopped attending my classes and when I try and help him, Steven flat out ignores me"

"Oh right." Anne licks her teeth "Like what you've been doing to Ste then, for months..."

"Oh for Christ's sake..."

"No, it's true. You have done that. So what, _now_ you expect him to be alright with it? Brendan wake up love, he's hurting and Ste will lash out at every opportunity because of it"

"I did it for his own good! Ye think I want this? I don't believe me. Patrick wants to offer me a permanent position here at the college"

"What? Brendan that's fantastic!" Anne gasps as she stands, her enthusiasm is dwindled when she sees Brendan shaking his head. "It's Ste, isn't it? You'd risk it all for him"

"I can't have both Anne, so I asked for a replacement again. I wanted to tell that stubborn little toe rag that I'd done it for us. He hates me of course. Who can blame him" Brendan throws his hand to the air, eyes flicking up at Anne.

"I think you should speak to Ste about this properly. The only reason he's that hot headed is because he still likes you. Go tell him the truth"

"He ain't gonna listen. I've blown it Anne"

"Go round, knock on Ste's door and get him back. I'd argue till I was blue in the face otherwise, obviously you love him"

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves"

"Oh shut up. You're crazy about that boy. He's mad about you. Made for each other. It's sickening" Anne says, her smile gradually widens.

* * *

It takes Brendan until Saturday night to buck up the courage to even visit him. He knew Ste had fallen out with him, the longer the time that had passed by worsened it. The days drew into weeks easily and one day Ste never turned up to his lesson and that had been the last time he'd properly seen anything of him.

He played out the scenarios in his mind, first pacing the carpet thread bare in his lounge. Then walking along the pavement. Walking up to the house jeered at his heart, forcing the beats to intensify. A tender knock became confident one. What more was there to lose?

He hadn't banked on Amy.

"What the _hell_ do you want?" Amy spoke directly, cautiously glancing back into the house, anger bubbling, the door was pulled to as she stood with Brendan.

"Amy" Brendan greeted his neighbour and tried to avoid her scrutiny. "Can I see Steven?"

"No, you can't see Ste. Do you know what you did, huh? What, thought you were the big I am English teacher, thought you could hurt him?" Amy prodded Brendan in the chest, gradually guiding him back up the path while her tongue rolled off a tirade at the older man. He feared she'd carry on until he'd reached the gate.

"Hey, I didn't set out to do that. It's not me who makes the bloody rules up. How was I supposed to know I'd be placed at his college?! I've ran out of crystal balls Amy"

"Save your whining for someone who gives a shit. I don't care about a man who sets out to break my friends' heart. Because that's what you did" Amy spoke with a scour on her face, disillusioned by the man in front of her and how he could stand so pretentious.

Brendan sighed heavy, in defeat almost. The girl was only protecting her friend. "Firstly, I had no idea Steven was this hurt, and by staying away I thought I was doing the best thing. Secondly ye really believe I'd do that on purpose? Let me see Steven, please"

Amy stood with her hands weighted against her hips, eyes like daggers. Breathing deeply through her nose she turned back to the house. She looks again at Brendan whose sincerity becomes clearer each passing moment. "If Ste says no, you leave"

"At least give me the chance to not give up that easily. I made that mistake once already and miserable doesn't cut it."

Amy seemed to soften, only minutely and flashed that quickly it was a surprise he's seen it at all. The girl obviously determined in her beliefs and unstoppable as a friend. Brendan worried when she'd gone indoors, it worsened when within only a few seconds she's stood there again, head shaking.

"He said you need to leave"

"No chance. Ye tell Steven I ain't going anywhere. Tell him to hear me out"

Amy huffed and tried again. Her face turning sour with the awkwardness that he was still stood there like a bad smell. Brendan grinned, he wasn't helping himself any.

Amy's face resembled thunder when she appeared again. Face sunken, like she'd had enough of this, like her night could be better spent. Brendan felt his heart sink, his finger gestured to the downstairs window.

 _"He in there"_ Brendan mouthed leaving Amy nodding silently. Brendan swallowed thickly.

"Steven...I know ye can hear me. Remember that night at the party and what we decided. I never told ye how nervous I was, about something that had probably been fated from the start. Nothing's changed from that night, speak to me"

Brendan hazarded a glance up at Amy who looked fit to burst. "What else happened at the party?"

"Sorry Amy. A gentleman never tells"

"Ste..." Amy almost whispers seeing Ste. He has his arms draped around his smaller frame. He barely gazes up. Brendan swallows again seeing him this way. Ste tells Amy it's okay to leave them alone.

"Steven..."

"Just go Brendan. I only come out here to say it myself, cause obviously that's what ya needed."

"What I need is stood right in front of me."

"Not once you'd found out I were ya student. No good for you then was I. It's over remember?" Ste moved to close the door but Brendan rushed to prevent him from doing so placing a hand to the door.

"I'm not going anywhere. I just need ye to hear me out. Come on ey? This is why second chances were created, so idiots like me learn humility"

"Look, I'm busy. I'm not alone, so you need to leave" Ste babbled out his words quickly, he still couldn't look Brendan in the eye, anywhere but.

"You're not alone?" Brendan's voice dipped. "I'm interrupting ye mean"

"Yeah, um ya know what...it don't matter _._ You didn't want me anymore and it's over" Ste spoke trying to fight off the hurt in his words.

"I _did._ Ye couldn't just wait for me though. Obviously a hard thing to ask of ye Steven."

"Made your feelings clear yeah."

"That easy huh? Ye know what, thank ye for reminding me how much of a bad idea this was"

 _"Brendan..."_ Ste stepped back out of the front door, tried to grab his arm back but Brendan jerked back around anyway. They were close together again and Ste swallowed hard placing his eyes on him.

Brendan sees Doug walk out of the house searching for Ste. He's oblivious and halts at the doorway. Brendan feels like a train has hit him, the older man scoffs raising his fingers. "Now it all makes sense. Not alone huh?"

"Wait right..."

"I mean him? Really?! Ye choose him over me?"

Ste didn't answer and when Doug innocently places his hands on Ste's shoulders Brendan knows it's his time to go. He makes it to the gate. "I'll be leaving college. That's what I came to tell ye, that I'd been asking for months to leave and I did it for us. So ye can stop skipping my classes, cause soon I won't be there to avoid anymore."

Ste watches Brendan slam the gate behind him and crash into his house. The anger and upset more than apparent. A tear falls down Ste's cheek as he breathes heavier with every breath he takes. Doug squeezes his hands in reassurance as Ste turns to look at him.

"What was his problem then, am I missing something?" Doug puffs out a long tired breath, double takes a look at Ste. "What?"

"He thinks we're seeing each other"

"Ha ha, very funny. Why would he think that? Hang on, are you asking me out?" Doug's eyes widen.

"God no. I mean, soz. I did it to get him back, but it really upset him an I feel terrible. He's leaving the college, means there's nothing stopping us anymore."

"Yup, _and_ he must have done that for you because that's his job right?" Doug says, fully in acceptance. See's the red of Ste's eyes glimmer with the unshed tears "If someone were willing to do that for me, well, you're lucky."

"Reckon it's time I realised that too. Doug, can we study another time?"

"Sure thing. It was pretty low using me though, you owe me for that. I'll get going. And I'll see ya in college no doubt" Doug bumps into Ste's shoulder as he leaves. Ste inhales a deep breath and wipes the tears from his eyes. Pulls the door to and wanders around to Brendan's. His nerves have a free for all dancing around his body and bringing him to an almost halt in his movements.

Ste is surprised when he touches the front door it opens for him, Brendan used to leave it off the latch purposefully in the past but he suspects now it was in mistake. The lock clicks closed this time though and Ste nibbles his bottom lip nervously walking through his house once more. After searching, Ste finds Brendan in the kitchen, lent up against the counter with a glass of whiskey in his hand and the opened bottle sat on the side. Brendan half laughs at the sight of Ste but he's not concerned how he got in.

"That's not the solution" Ste advises, gestures to the drink in Brendan's hand.

"I know it isn't. I plan to go out, find a bloke that isn't ye and bring him back here" Brendan speaks spitefully, looks directly into Ste's eyes. "Maybe I'll fuck him on the couch through there, hm? A good a way as any to help me _move on_ isn't it. Perhaps ye could give me some tips young Steven, seen as you're an old hand at it"

"I didn't sleep with Doug. All we've done is study." Ste says, he continues to keep Brendan's gaze but stays where he is and anchored to the spot.

"What's the matter, desperate to stop me huh? Well tough, ye never thought twice before letting Dougie boy touch ye"

"I'm here because I didn't choose him over you" Ste confidently steps over to Brendan and removes the glass from his hand, replaces it with his car keys he'd found in the lounge. Ste closes Brendan's fingers around them and looks back up at him.

"What, need a lift to _Dougsville?"_

A slither of a smirk wavered across Ste's mouth, a chuckle escaped his mouth. "When you've finished throwing ya dummy out, we're going for a drive"

"Oh we are? I might not be _arsed_ to drive" Brendan lowers his voice to a growl, his eyes dart heavily with Ste's and hasn't strength to fight his true feelings. "Where exactly?"

"That cafe we went to, will it be open now?"

"Could be. It's a bit far out"

Ste shortens the gap between them enough to have Brendan tall above him and still unbreaking their eyes. "I wanted to hurt you out of spite. I don't want to argue anymore, so let's go for a drive, away from here."

"I'll get the car" Brendan sighs, holds his hands up and agrees to anything the boy says. The drive is a little tasking and out in the countryside. The dark country lanes are dense and ominous with no street lighting and a stretch of cats-eyes litter the middle of the road as the headlights bounce off them showing the way. It's snows on the journey, a sleet storm that capture within the beams of light as cars pass by them. Ste shivers and Brendan leans across to turn the heating up for him until he stops.

Brendan drives carefully throughout and the silence is heavy in the car for them both. Occasionally Brendan does quickly glance at Ste, only for seconds at a time but he can't seem to stop. It's been a long time since they spent this much time alone and he'd missed him. Ste remained quiet but knew Brendan couldn't take his eyes of him. He still kept his gaze firmly on his hands despite.

"This is ye sulking then. Gotta tell ye Steven, you're thorough at making a point"

"Says you. I'm not sulking"

"It speaks!" Brendan gasps, thrill to his voice. "Funny story for ye...today the headmaster offers me a permanent job at the college yeah? Funny part...I told him I wanted to leave despite. Ye wanna have a wild stab at why that is?"

Ste looks at Brendan finally, his eyes burn into him "I can't believe you'd do that"

"Me neither" Brendan says, his smile shows his lightened mood. "Especially as we're nothing but friends"

"You always shove your tongue down your friends' throats do ya? Give me strength. Got plenty of _friends_ " Ste looks at Brendan. "How about you explain to me how we got into this situation"

Brendan swallowed thickly glancing quickly at Ste. "I was on my way with Anne to the school I was meant to be teaching at. She was the one who explained there had been a change. Dropped it on me that first day, that I'm teaching at your college. I swear I tried to get a transfer that morning, Patrick wouldn't listen to me. How would it have looked if we'd continued as normal? The rules are there to protect students Steven, it's not a conspiracy."

"I wasn't asking you to skip down the corridors of college holding my hand Brendan. Just a little bit of respect and not ignoring me would have been a good start. If anything you looked guilty as sin. But whatever, yeah"

They drive up to the café but it's closed now. Brendan still parks up and holds folded arms to the steering wheel. "There's something else. Mr Blake wants to throw ye out of the college. For skipping my lessons. Says you're not interested and someone else could take your place."

"I didn't plan on skipping lessons." Ste replies awkwardly and looks out at the closed cafe in front of them. The only light given from the all night garage next to it.

"I can hazard a guess why you'd be avoiding me, but your lessons? Come on"

"It's not what you assume actually. Well, part of it was to avoid you. I don't think ya realise how much seeing you meant to me" Ste spoke with a low voice, felt the atmosphere change in the car. Brendan sighed quietly then, eyes down. Ste felt the lump in his throat hurt trying to swallow his upset down.

"With the way things were between us I felt I couldn't speak with you any longer. The work, I struggle with, like, the text was hard sometimes and I couldn't tell ya about it. I get embarrassed enough as it is. So I gave up instead"

 _"Steven"_ Brendan spoke softly, angled Ste's chin around so he could look at him. "I have let ye down. Ye can always approach me, with anything. Don't let our personal problems effect your education, that's what I care about. Will ye come back to my lessons, and accept extra help. Please"

Ste nods his head and pushes into the curve of Brendan's hand, closes his eyes. "Yes okay. There's conditions though. I want to go back to how we were Brendan. You gotta make it happen."

"Once they find a replacement at the college for me then..."

"Which could take more months. What if we can't wait that long?" Ste speaks pleadingly, looks at Brendan, his hands are gripping a hold of the steering wheel, head shaking from annoyance, exhaustion

"Be with me Brendan." Ste reaches over against his thigh. Brendan gazes at Ste, the low light shrouding his expression. "I miss the feel of you, your taste. How you made me feel when I was around you. I need that again."

Brendan's head falls onto his folded arms. "Ye think this is easy for me too?"

"I could promise never to ask again"

Brendan scoffs, chin rubbing against his shirt sleeves. "How can ye promise not to do something ye want so badly?"

"Because it's you who turned up on my doorstep. I'm only sat here because of how badly you want me back" Ste angles his body around, seat belt tightening along his chest. "Means you'll ask me the next time"

Brendan meets Ste in the middle, their lips pressing close. Ste smiles as they do, melts once Brendan slides the tip of his tongue out to part his nervous lips. Ste struggles with his seat belt, mouth playing along with every move Brendan makes. It leaves his fingers frantic trying to unclasp the buckle.

When it does finally release Ste shifts quickly placing Brendan back into his seat with a bounce. Legs wide Ste straddles Brendan's lap and takes his kisses on completely. Bodies pressed sinfully close, Ste's tongue strokes a wet line over Brendan's leaving him dragging Ste's body nearer. As Ste rakes a slow tight grip of Brendan's thick hair through his fingers the kiss slows down and becomes a long steady mix of laughs and moans. They both stay close once it ends, smiles pressed into one another.

 _"Brendan"_

 _"No"_

"Stop it" Ste smiles, rests their foreheads together.

"Go on, what"

"Ask me"

Brendan chuckles and shakes his head. _"I can't"_

"Why" Ste whispered pleadingly, edges back to gaze into Brendan's eyes.

 _"Because I'd never stop. We need to go"_

"Don't go. _"_

"I have too...I have too"

Ste shakes his head the faintest amount and draws Brendan nearer to him, Ste smiles the moment he gives in, places his lips on him. They're small at first, the kisses. Soft little teases against Brendan's mouth that Ste cannot help but do. They entice and produce a rolling sensation in Brendan's stomach, everything pulls him towards the boy in front of him. The way his eyes flutter, those lashes are sinfully long sweeping, unshielding the most addictive blue eyes.

Car headlights filter quickly into the car leaving Ste faltering on breath parting Brendan's intoxicating kiss. It's dark again when Ste glances at Brendan's eyes. He can't see, but the older man is looking right at him.

"Now what" Ste asks, neither of them making a move. Some more headlights filter through the car again and it seems to shake Brendan back down to earth again.

"We go back home. You'll attend my classes and the extra tuition I lay out for ye"

"I'll roll over like a good boy ya mean. Brendan, we can be careful. Be with me outside of college, no one will know" Ste says, the burn of Brendan's moustache still tingling at his jawline. "Ya already dying to kiss me again"

"Bet I can hold out" Brendan smoothed his voice deeper, smile becoming bigger each passing second. Brendan gently pushed at Ste's thigh, encouraged Ste to move off of him and sit back in the passenger seat. "Tuition outside of college?"

"Yep, at your place cos it's _private"_

"At my place because _I've all the text books there"_

"We can be alone and _do whatever we please"_ Ste corrects Brendan, smirk firmly in place.

"All we do is _study."_

"All we do is _snog"_ Ste honks out his laughter. "Windin you up is ace"

"Are ye gonna be a good student for me?"

"Mr Brady I'll be the best student you've ever had. Good as gold me. I learn fast an study dead hard"

"Dead hard ye say?" Brendan parts his lips noisily. "Okay, we'll give it a go. No funny business mind"

"Brendan, who are ya trying to kid? There is no way you can resist me after that little display. I know your weakness, where to put my tongue in your mouth. And now, so do you." Ste said, resting his full body back relaxed against the seat. Brendan in his side view, Ste glowed with his beam. He was pretty sure Brendan was too.

* * *

"I don't like it Ste, you're the one who is gonna get hurt here. Not him." Amy stood at the opening of Ste's bedroom, waited up until he'd arrived home. Ste rolled his eyes and bounced down hard on his bed. His friends' gaze fed a slow burn inside him until he'd eventually allowed her eye contact.

"What? Look right, there's nothin' to worry about. We just went for a drive." Ste avoided Amy's gaze until she moved and sat down beside him.

"It wasn't just a drive though. How can you be his student when you have feelings for him"

"No...I don't"

"Ste, please. You're gonna go to college see Brendan day in day out and know nothing can happen. It might be easy for him, a little too easy."

"I know what I am doing Ames, I promise. Besides I don't want to get kicked out do I? Brendan is helping me" Ste shuffles himself under the duvet and lays flat in his bed. Amy moves to the edge and continues to study her friends face.

"I just care about what happens to you Ste, we kinda all do. Anyway, I promise I won't say anything more about it. It's late, best sleep huh?"

"I'll try too, the night air has helped, feeling light headed" Ste replied, turned to watch Amy leave his bedroom. He wasn't light headed because of the air, it was more than that. It was the lingering ghosting on his lips, the faint buzz along his tongue. The every thing he could still feel of Brendan on his mouth, in his mouth. Ste rubbed his palms harshly against his face, half groaning in frustration.

* * *

December

Ste tags along with Rae when she goes shopping after he'd finished a morning shift at work. An impromptu decision, the two friends visit a few different stores where Rae buys some outfits Ste helps her to choose. In the third store Ste sits in the dressing room area, outside on a chair waiting for his friend to come out. When she does, Rae gleams with a smile, gives a twirl and waits for Ste's reaction. Her face falls slightly watching him nibble at his bottom lip looking distantly.

"Ste, what do you think?"

"What? Oh yeah. Nice."

"Wow, that good huh." Rae plants herself down next to Ste, nudges him slightly in the arm until he meets her eyes. "Come on Ste, gotta talk to me. You've been distant all afternoon and I ain't no mind reader. What's up?"

"It's been a few weeks since me an Brendan started to study together" Ste says, stretches his body up straighter on the chair.

"Hm, and it's going well. You're catching up and doing loads better. Especially since you actually attend the lessons now"

"Yeah I am but..." Ste sighs heavy. "It's all we do init? _Study."_ Ste grumbles, like it's the most boring thing in the universe.

Rae quirks her mouth up, head shaking slightly. "Right, and that's what you're _supposed_ to be doing Ste"

"No ya don't get it...I thought that now we were spending time together again we'd...ya know"

Rae waited with bated breath, Ste wasn't the greatest at riddles, or perhaps she was just crap at working them out "Ste, just tell me"

"He hasn't kissed me. Or tried owt despite me making it bloody obvious" Ste huffs a long sigh.

"Ooohhh!" The penny drops, Rae stands up and paces the dressing room area. "You're frustrated! Ha ha. Okay, sorry, shouldn't laugh. Um, so you have made it obvious, flirted?"

"Yeah I always do that. It's like he's on permanent teacher mode. Driving me mad. I swear to god he looks at me, an I have to define all odds not to melt through the floor. Those eyes, they tell a different story Rae. But he's put up these walls"

"Alright, I understand where you're coming from, but this is his job, to be a teacher Ste. Could be Brendan just wants you to do well, giving up his spare time like he has been doing"

"I am grateful for all Bren's help. Really I am, but I miss that closeness we had."

"Okay, you gotta get him to notice Ste." Rae tells him and ponders a moment or two, looks Ste over curiously. Ste glances down himself then feeling slightly sub conscious. "Or at least spell it out, what do you wear when you go round?"

"What do I wear? Dunno, jeans an a top. Trainers. Hey I ain't getting dolled up, it's not like I am going out on the town" Ste says with a chuckle. Watches his friend pause to think. "What?"

"Brendan ever used to look at you differently when you wore somet else?"

"Well, he used to look when I had a trackie on but...no. That's not gonna get him going"

"Listen, if he likes you in them it will get him going. You're just reminding him why you guys spent so much time together in the first place, a little nudge in the right direction. That material is good though, it fits your bum. You've a nice bum Ste" Rae admits with a nod.

"Probably shouldn't be looking. But ta" Ste winks and then stands himself, a little excitement and intrigue spurring him on. "I'll have to buy a new one then. What else?"

Rae squeals slightly and rushes back to the changing room. "I'll get out of this, you find some and we'll choose together. Hurry up!"  
They spend the next hour finding something for Ste. Rae giving her honest opinion with each one until he finds a dark blue track suit that fits him perfectly. Afterwards they find a café to sit in and order some food.

"We should do this more often, it's been a blast. Who'd have thought trackie's could be so _alluring_ though" Rae smiles and holds onto Ste's hand across the table. "Seriously, I've missed you"

"I agree we should. I kinda disappeared didn't I? Just wanted to spend all my time with Bren you know" Ste sighs "Look how that turned out though ey?"

"You know I still catch Brendan looking at you in class. He can't do much more really, but that shows he feels the same. Don't be too hard on him Ste, he has a job to do and a living to earn"

"Guess I'm very selfish when it comes to Brendan. Thanks for this today. I just want him to notice me again, remember before we were student and teacher. Hope it's not too late"

"He liked the cookies, remember he brought the box back as an excuse to see ya. Food, make something for him. Eat together, draw his eyes to your mouth. That always works, it's suggestive"

"Listen to you, not so shy little Rae anymore. No one at college ya have your eye on?" Ste asks interested, sips his drink.

"Might be. I'm keeping my options open, maybe the next supply teacher will be as fit as yours and bat for my team" Rae winks finishing the last of her drink.

* * *

Ste is more nervous going around to Brendan's tonight, he'd always have the little flutters in his stomach, that was a normal occurrence, but tonight they are more profound those nerves of his. He's got his tracksuit on and because it is new, it's soft and almost silky against his bare skin. He can feel the material cling in certain areas of his body, at the sculptured curves of his assets. It feels good on him and he hopes it looks as good as he makes his way to Brendan's home.

Every night had become study night now, however during this carefully thought out plan they'd simmered down on intimacy. And Ste missed that, their closeness, the way Brendan wouldn't think twice to find ways of touching him. Now it was all about his lessons and teaching Ste enough to pass his exams which was a great thing, but did nothing for his growing frustration. Ste pushed his hand against the door and as normal it sprang open.

A faint noise could be heard through the house, music Ste would come to realise as he ventured further through Brendan's home. The older man was sat on the sofa, head back listening to it play out around him. He had his suit trousers on, a black and deep blue trimmed shirt that fell unbuttoned from the neck showing off his chest hair and silver cross he always wore. Brendan looked handsome sat there, Ste always loved him in his suits. This was the first time in a while he'd worn one as they studied though. Ste then worried perhaps he was cancelling and going out instead, he certainly looked good enough too.

Brendan suddenly smirked, the smile inching across his lips. Ste faintly blushed, wondered how he'd always know Ste was there in the room despite having his eyes closed.

"I snuck in as well"

"Doesn't matter, I always know when you're here" Brendan turned and opened his eyes. They move slowly down the length of Ste's body, back up again leaving the blossom in Ste's cheeks to deepen in colour. The older man looks like he's about to speak, but he leans forward instead flicks his eyes up to Ste's and bores into them.

"So, you look really good tonight. Off out somewhere?" Ste clears his throat as he speaks, Brendan's eyes doing that thing again. He feels his knees weaken.

"Took the words right out of my mouth, that new?" Brendan gestures his hand to Ste's new clothes.

"Uh huh, bought it today actually. Do you like it?"

Brendan nods his head "Did ye buy it for tonight?"

"Might have" Ste admits chewing the corner of his mouth.

Brendan gets up and wanders over to the music.

"No, leave it. Makes a change don't it?" Ste walks over to Brendan. "This looks old"

"Yeah, well from when I was a kid. This is how us old folk listened to music back in the days of yore and dinosaurs. Vinyl." Brendan explains and shows Ste a sleeve from the record playing, let's the younger boy hold it in his hands. "It sounds loads better this does"

"Me mam had some of these, stuffed in the attic. I used to explore when I was little, well hide more like. Anyway I discovered some stairs behind a door, led up to the attic space. The ceiling was really low and there was only one tiny window up there. It let in enough light to see so I rummaged through the stuff up there and found a record player and records. Stuff I'd never heard of." Ste smiles and looks up at Brendan who's listening intently.

"Did ye play any? I have a few, mostly Jonny Cash. They'll be worth money one day."

"I did once or twice yeah, after I'd worked out how to use the thing. It wasn't my taste of music but I liked being able to hide away mostly. One time when Terry was drunk, I'd gone up there keeping out of his way. But he finds me doesn't he. I panicked hearing him coming up those wooden steps and tried to hide. The record scratched, it was loud through the speaker cos of that needle."

"It slipped?" Brendan spoke with a low tone, has Ste gazing up at him and nodding.

"Slipped yeah, because I'd knocked it rushing away. The record had a scratch on it an Terry slapped me round the head for that. I tried to tell im it were an accident, but he never did listen. Then he looked around and gathered all those records of me mams. Sold them all and the record player. Spent the money on beer"

"So, after that did ye keep going into the attic?"

"Terry told her, my mam and she banned me from going up there, so no. It reminded me seeing this, everyone keeps old junk in there though don't they? Perhaps not junk, more like memories. I think they were important to my mam, not that he cared"

"There was one in the pub my Da ran - an attic. The door to it looked like the ones ye see in horror movies, ominous. Knocked on it this one time and someone knocked back"

"Really?!" Ste widened his eyes.

"Nah, course not." Brendan laughs as Ste shoves at him. "I never went up there, Da told me there were monsters that hid in the rafters. Probably nothing more than spiders up there - which is worse"

"Ya not scared of a creepy crawly are ya?"

"I don't like em, they can stay up there" Brendan smiled at Ste then. "Just like old times isn't it, this?"

"Yeah, feels good. Are you hungry, cos I made somet for us. Am I alright to use your kitchen?" Brendan agrees leaving the music and accompanies Ste to the kitchen.

"Smells good this does" Brendan speaks as he opens the fridge. Brings out a couple of cold beers for them. Ste starts to fidget at the side of him, jiggles while Brendan raises his eyebrows at the sight of him.

"Ye got ants in your pants?"

"Nah, got an itch on me back" Ste moves uncomfortable trying to reach behind himself at an awkward angle. Brendan closes the fridge door and stands behind Ste, rubs his fingers over the soft of his track suit

"Better? No?" Brendan asks, but Ste still wriggles. The older man lifts his top and rakes his nails down Ste's back leaving Ste hitching a breath.

"Uh flippin eck! Can ya not warm your hands, they're cold!"

Brendan laughs and uses his other icy touch hand to hold against Ste's soft tummy, anchors him in place. Ste closes his eyes and bites down on his bottom lip, feels weightless with the twang inside his stomach. He inverts the outside of it, can't help but react to Brendan's hands on him. Brendan ghosts a smile and purposely drags his fingers curling into Ste's belly button.

"Where on your back?"

"Up a bit...to the right. Wait, down now. Yeah, that's the spot, ta." Ste hums satisfied, carries on making the tea. Brendan crowds in closer encouraging Ste to flick his eyes up and turn his head back an inch. They haven't been this close in so long and Ste doesn't want Brendan to stop anytime soon.

"Found your spot well, didn't I. Good to practice these things" Brendan says, and drags his hand from Ste's back, rests it on his hip.

"Bren are we still talking about my back here?"

Brendan smiles into nook of Ste's neck. "Did ye wear this for me?" Brendan's hand moves down Ste's thigh and grips hard.

"Don't be mad right. I wanted ya to notice me again. All this studying, I appreciate your help, I do, but..."

Brendan bites softly along Ste's neck and moves back a little. "But, you're wanting some attention, this okay?"

"More than okay."

"I always notice ye. Kinda got wrapped up in this studying haven't we?"

"Yeah. So seen as we've both made the effort, obviously thinking the same. Can we have a night off?"

"Good plan. What ye want to do?"

"Let's eat this, stay in." Ste says, the knife he's using drops against the counter while he leans his head back on Brendan's shoulder. "Your hands feel good on me"

Brendan's body clung to him like a second skin. Ste brought up his hand and brushed his fingers through Brendan's hair. Ste turns then, his arms lift high enough to curl around Brendan's neck. They spend a long time just looking at each other. Brendan rocks closer and kisses Ste, has him up on the tip of his toes. Brendan's fingers slide up the sides of his body, moves under his clothes and palms against his waist. Ste widens his mouth and lets Brendan's tongue explore his mouth again. It breaks off noisily.

"No more studying Brendan. Me brain feels like it's gonna explode with all the knowledge. Can't we just eat this and make out on the couch all night instead?" Ste laughs at Brendan's face.

"See I _knew_ this shirt did it for ye, why I wore it. That and...Anne said I needed to up my game" Brendan shrugs with his confession.

"This was Rae's idea" Ste pulls at his jacket, flush in his cheeks. "I remember you looked more when I wore a trackie."

"The world stops to look at ye Steven. Now enlighten me as I am a little older, what exactly does making out mean?" Ste stretches his body up and whispers something in Brendan's ear, pulls back enough to gaze into his eyes. "Thought so. I'm wearing this shirt more often"

Ste laughs and swiftly turns back to the counter "This is just a quick rice dish, won't be long. What do you like best, I want to cook somet ya like"

"I like Steak, bloody of course"

"Eurgh, I'll cook ya a steak next time then. I'll make sure it's mooin. Shall we eat in the lounge for a change, then we can hear your music can't we"

"Lounge it is. Ye seem to like doing this, cooking. Anthony may have conjured up another chef in the household"

"Yeah, I do like it. Relaxes me. Plus ya did say it's the way to your heart" Ste didn't look at Brendan but he knew he was smiling as much as he was. Brendan's phone vibrated in his pocket distracting them and moving him away from Ste. He saw the smile disappear from his face as he held up a finger and told Ste he'd be back. The younger boy hid back his concerns and dished out the meal for them. Walking through to the living room, Ste placed the bowls on the coffee table, eyes flicking up when Brendan entered the room and sat down heavy on the sofa. A sigh forced hard from his lungs, legs apart and hands by his side, Brendan made tired eye contact with Ste.

"You alright?" Ste asked tentatively, passed him his bowl. "You don't have to tell me"

"No, it's okay. That was my sister, Chez. I'll introduce ye one day actually. She'll love ye. So that call was about my Da. Chez is still tryin to get me to go over and see him. "

"I'd like to meet her. So, you're gonna go are ya?" Ste asks, swings his leg under him and sits at an angle with Brendan. They eat together, Ste mostly keeping all his attention on Brendan while his thoughts dominate their silence.

"No I'm not going there. I left for a reason and if I ever go back it'll be to bury him. They say closure is the greatest thing, somehow I doubt mine will be so great. This is, this is good Steven...thank ye" Brendan smiles faintly, eats the rice with a hum of satisfaction.

"Weren't much but glad its okay. Guess because he's ill she's asking. Cheryl knows you and your dad don't get along."

"Don't get along?" Brendan scoffs loudly, leaves Ste feeling stupid and awkward. "Steven, that's an understatement. I hate that man, he gave me a life of regrets"

"You finished with that? Here give it us" Ste grabs the bowls and leaves them on the table. Kneels up so he's facing Brendan. "No more regrets Bren. An I know it's not gonna be a smooth ride this, but it's worth it I think. Me an you are gonna be happy right, I promise."

"Me and ye huh? Ye mean separately or together?"

"Both. If you decide to go..."

"I won't Steven."

"Oi, interrupting. Rude" Ste grins and places his fingers over Brendan's mouth. "If you decide to go to visit your dad I'll come with ya. That way he can't hurt you with me there to protect you"

Brendan nods the tiniest amount, removes Ste's hand. "Ye would do that for me?"

"Yeah, course! I'd do anything for ya - if I could"

"I might hold ye to that." Brendan keeps Ste's eyes under his spell gripping the zip of Ste's tracksuit jacket in his finger tips. It clicks little by little while Brendan drags the zip down. "Ye wearing anything under here?"

"Keep goin an you'll find out" Ste kisses Brendan, thumbs open a button on his shirt then another one and begins to slowly feed his fingers below the material "I'm betting you're not. We'll be okay ya know? I'll keep my distance at college and alone we can be ourselves."

"Good job you're so positive. Remind me, just how did we pass the time together?"

Ste grins pulling Brendan into a firm kiss. "Come here an I'll show ya"


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you for the amazing messages and reviews for this story. Merry Christmas everyone :D xx

* * *

The Boy Next Door

Part 6

December

By the time mid December arrived, the ground was already covered in snow as winter began to draw in early. In the college grounds snowmen stood happy with their hats and scarves and snowball fights had soon become the lunch pastime. The days had turned into weeks quickly and with Patrick no nearer to finding a replacement for Brendan, a routine soon became set for them at the college.

"Ste" Amy nudged her friend precariously, grit her teeth trying to sound as quiet as she could. "He'll catch you"

"Who...?" Ste answered absentmindedly, eyes down on his phone screen and the messages he'd received. Amy placed her head on his shoulder to nosy.

"God, I can't _believe_ you two. Especially him, he's meant to be a _tutor!"_ Amy thickened her whispering words into Ste's ear leaving him rolling his shoulder back.

"We ain't botherin' anyone" Ste says, his smile permanent.

 _'Where 4 art thou...' S_

 _'Shakespeare? Impressed' B_

 _'Googled it ;P' S_

 _'Ba mhaith liom a póg leat_. _Google this' B_

 _'Come here and say that' S_

 _'I just might. Where are u?' B_

 _'Biology. Bored' S_

 _'Come see me tonight' B_

 _'Working late shift ;(' S_

 _'Always working' B'_

 _'U missing me Mr Brady?' S_

 _'Nope.' B_

Ste smiles reading his message, but there's a sudden silence in the room that stops him from doing so. Ste inches his head around and sees the class staring at him, then looks at Amy who is now sat up straight and gesturing her eyes front. Ste followed them and landed his gaze upon Mr McQueen stood arms folded and eyebrows raised in question. Ste swallowed and shifted back in his chair properly.

"No, please don't stop on account of us. I mean clearly you have something better else to be doing than my class. So come on...let's hear it" John Paul says, moves to sit back upon his desk and waits. Ste curls his bottom lip underneath his teeth.

"Nothing...it were just a spam message." Ste explained, his eyes shifted to the text book in front of him while Amy was visibly shaking stopping herself from laughing. Ste kicked her foot in warning.

"Spam message? I'm expected to believe that has been distracting you my entire class?"

"I said so didn't I?" Ste snapped becoming irritated. There was a knock at the door that interrupted them and Brendan walked in with some paperwork in his hand. The sharply dressed English tutor halted at the entire class and John Paul all staring at him.

"Something I said?" Brendan asks intrigued, walks over to John Paul turning to look around the class until he finds Ste sat at the back with Amy. His smile immediate when he does.

"Heard ye might be needing these" Brendan passed the papers to John Paul, eyes fully on Ste who couldn't help but smirk. "What's going on in here then, sponsored silence?"

"Mr Hay was about to enlighten us about some messages on his phone" John Paul replied upon taking the files from Brendan's hand. "Something more important than my class obviously"

"Shocking. Messages ye say. I wonder." Brendan stiffens, arms holding around his chest. Ste could've killed him, his blue eyes burning desire over him. Body standing full frontal, the dark suit he wore stretched tight against the body it encased allowing Brendan to show off his every asset just for Ste.

"Could he be any more obvious?" Amy says on whisper leaning close to Ste. "Jeez ya gotta get him alone Ste, seriously. The sexual tension between ya gonna blow up the science lab"

"Say somet then, ya looking like a fish gawpin'"

 _"Ames...!_ I um... Look it's nowt, they're deleted now" Ste stared at Brendan shook his head nervously.

Brendan nodded sharply, eyes flickering back to John Paul before he made to leave. "Wait, Mr Brady, can I have a quick word outside?"

Ste watched them both leave the room, they were talking together at the door, the distinct sound of laughter echoing through the room. Ste had edged forward trying to hear anything of their conversation.

"You're on my _lap_ Ste" Amy huffed, shoving her friend out of the way. "They're just talking, chill out"

"Don't trust John Paul, he likes Bren. Wish I knew what they were sayin'" Ste sulked back into his chair and when John Paul resumed his class again, the sounds of it drifted off into a dull tone as his phone suddenly lit up again. Ste hid it behind the pages of his book.

 _'Bad boy texting during class' B  
_

 _'Wot did JP want?' S_

 _'Staff meeting' B_

 _'At the pub again I bet' S_

 _'Who cares. It's for all the staff' B_

 _'Stop letting him ask u out' S_

 _'Stop overreacting' B_

 _'It's the suit' B_

 _'Laugh it up' S_

 _'Caught u looking' B_

 _'Hard to miss, can u breathe in it?' S_

 _'Did u breathe Steven, sorry, I meant blush?'_

 _'U ain't clever' S_

 _'I'm a genius.' B_

 _'Meet me in the car park tonight'_ _B_

 _'If I ain't busy' S  
_

 _'Later. Your fancy man keeps havin a go' S_

"You are too quick to accuse him" Amy's voice trickles down Ste's ear, her eyes on his phone. Ste pockets it and crosses his arms as Mr McQueen finishes the lesson with a quick run down of the coursework they'll need to finish. Ste turns to Amy.  
 _  
_"He knows I don't mean it ya know? It's im there, needs to keep his hands to himself. I just wish I could go over there and wipe his smug smile off" Ste says with a long sigh, turns the page of his book to keep up with the rest of the class. "We've not seen each other much these last few week, so much for the studying. I'm always working and the coursework is just nuts. Well ya already know yourself"

"Gotta admit, there is a lot more of it this year. But you know, it's going fast. These few months have flown by." Amy agrees with her friend as they both stand up to leave the room. They follow behind the rest of the students and into the corridor.

"Yeah. Brendan is willing to give up his job for me an I feel bad about it, even though this kills our being together, he's really good at his job. I mean, he's done loads for me. I enjoy learning with him too"

"Don't ya mean _flirting_ with him?" Amy chuckles and crowds her arm around Ste's as they walk the long bustling corridor "You know I gave him a really hard time for hurting ya. And he deserved it but Brendan obviously cares about you. Would it really be so bad, waiting for him?"

"Continue as we have been? Yep I have considered doing the right thing Ames."

"No one will say owt, an I think a lot of people kinda know about you guys. If he enjoys the job, an I reckon Brendan does, then making that sacrifice shows how much you really love him. And you do... _love_ Brendan." Amy says confidently, stops them walking and holds her friend by the shoulders. "You can't hide it from me Ste, we've been friends too long"

Ste looks at Amy as their eyes dart freely, he nods and she slides her hands into his squeezing them reassuringly. "I'm not telling him yet, things are too up in the air. I just want to be with him each waking moment. It's like a full on hunger inside me, drives me bloody crazy"

Ste chuckles at Amy's face. "Ya don't understand..."

"No, I don't" Amy starts to walk them again. "But I can see, and it's plain as the nose on your face. Have faith Ste, you guys will work it out"

* * *

Brendan is leant up against his car later that afternoon, most of the students had left or were making their way out of the gates. He glanced at his watch as he waits for Ste to turn up. The footsteps heard in the snow that lay on the ground turned out to be John Paul, trudging over to his own car with a pile of paperwork in his arms. They exchanged a brief smile and John Paul had stifled a laugh at his predicament, eyes on his arms then at Brendan.

"Couldn't ask you for some help could I? Only I am not sure I'll make it to the car" John Paul said, visibly struggling. Brendan glanced idly around and then made his way over to John Paul.

"Taken to juggling here I see. My boot resembles your workload" Brendan grabbed the work from his hands and stood by while John Paul opened his car boot. Brendan placed them inside and noted his sudden close company. John Paul crowding in next to him, nervous smile on his mouth. Brendan stood up quickly and pointed to his own car.

"Right, well I'll be letting ye leave now"

"Wait, Brendan? I know this might seem forward, but I'd been thinking. The staff meeting, perhaps we could...I dunno, go without anyone else. A drink maybe?"

"A drink? Just..." Brendan gestured between them and raised his eyebrows accordingly. "Yeah, I'd have to decline. Nice car boot...spacious. Fit a whole body in that, probably." Brendan grinned and turned to leave.

"Why not? Just curious. You don't seem to be with anyone and it's almost Christmas, nice to have company" John Paul pushed, curled his hand around Brendan's bicep. A move Brendan watched carefully.

"That's none of your business"

"Oh look, there's Ste the slacker. No messages on your phone to disturb ya now I see! Now he's not in my class." John Paul laughed at Brendan who just repeated sharply with a sneer.

"Steven is no slacker, he works harder than most so hows about ye don't comment on something ye know nothing about" Brendan seethes into John Paul's face only backing off when he hears Ste move closer by.

"Gotta go. Let's _never_ do this again" Brendan added and moved over to Ste.

"Giving him a lift? A bit odd as he's your student"

"Do we have a problem here?" Brendan halted with his hands in his trouser pockets and turned to look back at his colleague. John Paul darted his eyes at Ste.

"I'll see you at the pub then Brendan, have a few drinks on me yeah" John Paul kept his eyes on Ste and closed his car boot with a slam. He drove off soon afterwards leaving Ste with half a conversation ringing in his ears.

"He's buyin ya drinks now too?" Ste spoke lowly, head shaking incredulously. "Still at least ya won't be breaking the rules being with him"

"Ye heard the tail end of that, the man asked me to go for a drink to which I rebuked his ideas. Ye getting in?" Brendan continued to look at Ste who watched John Paul drive away. "Ye don't need to worry about that Steven"

"I am going home, why don't ya stop off at the pub. He'll have your _drinks_ lined up" Ste sighed and walked off to catch the bus back despite the older man offering him a lift. Brendan followed in his car and managed to park up next to him as he walked home. Brendan climbed out of his car and watched Ste ignore him.

"Steven, enough of this, just get in the car" Brendan spoke sharply. Ste stopped to look at him before shaking his head wearily.

"I'll walk thanks, less hassle." Ste huffed his words, eyes penetrating before he turned to walk away. "Do one will ya, someone might see us together and we can't have that" Ste's voice was heavy with sarcasm.

Brendan annoyed, slammed the door shut with a swift flick of his wrist and proceeded to follow Ste through the local park. The long winding pathways shimmered with the thick snow and was difficult to walk on. This was was a short cut back to their street Brendan knew well having jogged there numerous times. Ste was walking impatiently kicking the soft snow underfoot, striding best he could to make a point of getting away. Brendan wasn't for giving up though and gained on Ste.

"My whole life I've never met anyone so damn stubborn as ye. It's freezing out here, get in the car" Brendan grabbed Ste's arm and jerked him to a stop, made the young boy turn to him.

"How are we are ever gonna have a future ey?"

"What?" Brendan widens his eyes, taken aback by the question.

"Although, that's laughable init? All we do is argue over jealousy, or the fact we can't be together"

"Why do we have to keep going over old ground?" Brendan knew it hadn't been the answer Ste had wanted. "Steven.. _.wait"_

"Yeah, glad we cleared that up." Ste grew tiresome and turned once again to leave.

 _"I can't lose ye"_ Brendan murmured releasing a strangled breath. Ste stopped then and closed his eyes, he could feel the sting of them as he welled up and felt the lump in his throat harden uncomfortable. Brendan's warmth circled Ste once he'd stood close behind him. "You're angry with me, that's my fault, I know."

"Brendan. It's the both of us stood here, not just you" Ste turns closing their gap. "I see him with you and I can't stand it."

"If ye had turned up earlier..." Brendan sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Ste felt guilt awash him and angled his head trying to capture Brendan's eyes. Ones that seemed determined to stare the ground beneath them out. Ste took Brendan's cheeks in his hand and anchored his attention on him.

"You're distracted. I can see a lot more than ya think ya know. What's wrong?"

"Chez" Brendan shook his head minutely." She keeps calling me about my father. It's been on my mind a lot lately. How am I meant to feel any pity for him. What he did, the reason's I left Ireland, I just want those images to stop ye know?" Brendan's glaze shifted upwards and held a uncertainty to them.

"Why didn't ya say somet then? Instead of wasting the time arguing with me; I could have been there for ya"

"You'd stopped coming round so."

"It's only been a few weeks Brendan, not a few years. Don't forget I have to work and that's out of college hours. That as well as doing my lessons and studying. Plus we'd agreed to the distance at college. I'm sorry, Bren" Ste held Brendan's jaw, fingers brushing through the sharp bristles on his face. "It's proper cold out here init. Reckon we could make a move before me balls fall off?" Ste added with a cheeky grin.

 _"Then get in the car"_ Brendan mithered with a chuckle and relaxed as he repeated his earlier words. "Please"

"Okay" Ste agreed and walked past Brendan. Sliding into the back of the car, Ste toed off his shoes and spread himself out against the long of the back seat. Brendan quirked his eyebrow in the rear view mirror watching him stretching out.

"That's my upholstery you're rubbing against"

"Wishin' it were you instead?" Ste smirked leaning eyes closed on the window. Brendan watched him for moments longer through the mirror.

"Put the heatin' on will ya, I'm cold back here" Ste says, the smile is full on his lips now.

"Come away with me for the weekend" Brendan says seemingly releasing a breath he's held since getting in the car. Feeling sudden relief, Brendan blasted the heat through the car capturing Ste's delirious eyes on him through the rear view mirror. Ste felt his heartbeat double, thumping at his rib cage.

"What?"

"Weekend away" Brendan repeated confidently and angled around to face Ste. "Just us"

"Are you serious, like, no studying?" Ste looked on stunned.

"No studying will be thought about Steven. We could go somewhere, stay over. Get away from this place. I'll understand if ye wanna get back out of this car and keep on walking. In fact it's probably best ye do"

Ste sat up then, sliding his knees beneath his chin. "We both know that's bollocks. Where ya thinking?"

"Such a pretty mouth. Ye choose somewhere"

"You gotta have a place in mind if you're asking me"

"Okay, I was thinking The Isle of Wight"

"That's abroad though...isn't it?"

"It's in the UK, a part of it. Need to get the ferry across. Ye said you'd never had a holiday, so thought you'd like traveling over. I'll take ye away properly one day though, if you're still putting up with me" Brendan paused to look at Ste. "Ye can close ye mouth now Steven"

"You remembered me saying that? About the holiday?"

"I was listening to ye the whole time we talked ye know"

"Always figured I went on too much an ya got bored"

"I did sleep easier actually..."

"Oi! Cheeky git. I'd been saving up, to go away. Was gonna go alone cos...I couldn't ask ya along could I, with everything going on"

"Well I'm changing that. It's only across the water, so wont take long. And they also have um, caravans... Seat belt on please" Brendan glanced up in the mirror again, small smile on his lips as he drove off. Ste outwardly fidgeted on the back seat during the journey home, obviously considering Brendan's words carefully.

"A caravan?" Ste spoke offended almost. "They don't even have a _TV_ them things. Plus they're small an they wobble in the wind!"

"For someone who doesn't like em, ye appear pretty knowledgeable"

"Saw it on Top Gear. Tells ya everything about caravan's"

Brendan stared at Ste through the mirror again, pulled on the handbrake at some traffic lights. His silence irritating Ste to huff a breath.

"Fine. You're joking anyway" Ste added dismissively.

"Am I? Ye know I sorted this especially for us, thought you'd want to go away together."

"I'll need to pack some stuff if we're stopping over then." Ste relented and Brendan's smile grew instantly. "Well, ya need me around don't ya. Ain't gonna ignore that am I?"

"A sly dig there. I deserve it"

"Don't matter." Ste says, grabbing his phone and spends a few moments on it. Brendan watches with interest.

"Who's that?"

"My boss. Got cover sorted." Ste grins and looks back at Brendan.

"Can we go tonight? Cause then we'd have two nights away wouldn't we?" Ste spoke with excitement in his voice, it grew louder as the time drew on. Brendan fed on his enthusiasm as it revived his troubled heart.

"Yeah, yeah we can. Just give me an hour okay? Meet me at the car. Two nights, tonight and Saturday. We'll be back Sunday tea time and I'll throw in some thermals, gets cold in them wobbly caravans"

* * *

After travelling on the ferry across to the Isle Of Wight, Brendan drives a mile or so till they reach a holiday park. Ste is quiet as they travel past a sea of caravans leaving Brendan smirking to himself, every now and then glancing at the younger boy in his passenger seat who had been hiding his excitement coming over here. Ste had been fit to burst as they traveled over and spent more time together than they had of late.

"They're quite big ain't they? And they have TV aerials on the roof." Ste mused looking out of the window.

"They have a bathroom and kitchen too Steven. Doors, windows, fuckin' blows your mind"

Ste turns sharply to look at Brendan chuckling and shaking his head. Ste slowly folds his arms against his chest. " Shurrup Bren, I were only sayin'"

They pull up and when Ste gets out of the car he sees a large log cabin in front of them, snow trapped over the roof and small icicles hung along the edges. He stands silently gawping at it and then turns to look at Brendan stood by his car door.

"Thought you said..."

"I decided on this instead, couldn't have ye with wobbly walls now could I? I'd never live with it Steven"

"Aw, I wanted the caravan now" Ste replied, grin spreading against his lips. Ste shoved the car door shut and jogged to the cabin. "Chuck us the key then!"

Inside hosted a warm feel decor of reds and mahogany within the living area, log fire in the center of the room and a window sided wall with doors that opened onto a small seating area. The open plan the kitchen was modern and fully catered to their needs. Ste eyes glowed taking it all in, walking straight through to the bedrooms and claimed one before moving back into the kitchen.

"Huge four poster bed through there. Never slept in one of those before" Ste mused while searching through each of the cupboards.

Brendan looks up at him with intrigue. "Sounds posh, there's always a first time"

"It's in your room, you need the space being taller don't ya" Ste found they were stocked with food, even the fridge was full of goodies to eat. Ste edged his head out of it and looked back at Brendan once he'd put his bag away. "Hungry? I could rustle us up somet. Or are ya tired, wanna early night?"

"That's gonna be pretty difficult seen as I can't sleep too well."

"Oh yeah...me either. I forgot. Too excited to sleep anyway. How about a walk, it's dark out but still. We can wrap up warm enough, plus I'll make us something to eat when we get back. Then we can talk, agreed?"

"Definitely having a drink then." Brendan waves his finger making the point clearer, he wanders over to the log fire and chucks some wood on it. "Won't need those thermals after all, this fire will keep ye warm"

"I've got you for that as well" Ste added without thought, he was still searching the kitchen. "There's drink here too Bren. Some wine an beers in the fridge. There's even some whiskey. It's like they knew"

"It's like I asked." Brendan replied. He'd walked up to Ste now, standing behind him to look in the fridge himself. Ste felt his warm breathing prickle up the hair on his neck and his hand press against his shoulder. Ste leaned his head back and captured Brendan's eyes gazing down upon him.

"Should we just stay in tonight?" Ste almost whispered. His eyes trailed to Brendan's mouth and triggered memories of the kisses they'd shared.

"Depends, did ye bring that blue tracksuit to slip into?" Brendan asks, watches the sparkle form in Ste's eyes.

"First thing I packed" Ste pulled the corner of his lip between his teeth and started to chuckle. Brendan happily joining Ste in his laughter.

"Ye warm enough, should I get the fire going?"

"A little chilly, so couldn't hurt" Ste swallowed and gazed through the sweep of his eyelashes. Brendan inched closer, lips loosening with his smile.

"How about ye work your magic in here and I'll be through shortly to lend a hand" Brendan suggested, he brought his thumb up to lightly sweep the round of Ste's cheek, dipped down leaving a lingering kiss on his lips. "Wanted to do that all evening"

"Me too" Ste said, pulling Brendan back down for another. "Buttie do ya, seen as it's late and ya ate on the ferry and in the car..."

"When I am not hungry? Sounds good"

* * *

"What ye thinking about?" Brendan asks, sips at his whiskey glass, sat opposite Ste on the long leather sofa. Ste is stretched out again, head resting on two large cushions to prop himself up. Their legs lay tangled up with each others. Ste's drinking wine, Brendan poured him one with the food they'd had earlier and the bottle stayed open.

"You." Ste admitted thoughtfully, the wine circled the bottom of his glass when he messed with it. "I mean, what it is you're putting off telling me. Cos I've seen ya looking into that glass and I don't think you're finding the answers are ya?"

"Never could Steven. I still go back despite though." Brendan says as he continues to look at the brown liquid. His gaze moves up to Ste when his foot glides gently over his calf. Brendan places his glass down and grabs Ste's ankle, slowly peels his sock off. Repeats the process with Ste's other foot and throws them both at him while a chuckle leaves his mouth. As Ste watches with interest, his face soon scrunches up when Brendan dares to tickle his feet.

"Ticklish huh? Mental note there"

"So would you be!" Ste drags a line beneath Brendan's sock covered foot with his finger until he pulls it away with a smile. Ste guides his toes high up and back down Brendan's leg. "You know I sometimes dream about you? When I sleep"

"You dream when ye sleep? Must be a miracle"

"God ya sarky." Ste replies, tickles Brendan's feet again in punishment.

"What happens in these dreams?"

"Nowt really, I just see you a lot. Just my mind imagines you even when I sleep. Its got taste"

"You're pissed boy. How much ye had to drink?"

"Ya made it up about the caravan, didn't ya?" Ste sits forward and points at Brendan. eyes slanting and lips curling into a smirk.

"No..." Brendan blinked his eyes up at Ste, paused the whiskey glass up to his lips "Yeah, I did. Worth the look on your face mind."

Ste beams back at Brendan and settles his teeth over his bottom lip. "All right init? When it's just us"

Brendan takes the sole of his foot up Ste's leg, pushes it out and playfully places it at Ste's nose. Ste bats his foot away sliding his fingers beneath the jeans to touch the hair on Brendan's leg, claws the tips of his fingers.

"Why I decided to do this ye know. I'd planned it all, and then ye go and sulk over a McQueen."

"Weren't sulking. I love this, what you've done...it's perfect."

"Good, ye warm enough?"

Ste nods silently, takes the glass of wine to his lips and sips at the liquid. Neither of them have averted their eyes from each other, perhaps gaining as much as they can from this time alone. Ste lays his leg up over Brendan's thigh until he brushes his fingers over the top of Ste's toes and skin.

"I think you should stay on at the college"

"Why would ye want me to do that? Ye know what it would mean for us"

"Basically the way we've lived all this time, yeah. I've been thinking about it these last weeks, hard not too. You're good at what you do Brendan, look at what you've done for me? My confidence with English, reading and writing is better because you never gave up on me. I'm leaving in like, six months. It'll pass quickly and to be honest I learn better now than I ever have done. Mr Blake doesn't want ya to leave either, obvious, keeps fobbing off your transfer doesn't he? I'm just trying to do the right thing."

"We don't have the best track record though. Fallen out with ye more times than my sister, and that's sayin' something. Although, since meeting ye my life hasn't been dull. If I consider this, we have to agree to keep up the study somehow. Even if it's just at college. I also will continue to berate Douglas, I cannot help it, the little swine follows ye around like a dog on heat"

Ste honks out his laughter almost spilling his drink in the process. "Fine and no going near Mr McQueen, you wanna learn biology you come to me. Cos believe me, I can teach ya loads"

"Can I help it if he wants a bit of the Irish charm? No? Okay then." Ste's eyes burn like the fire in front of them leaving Brendan in no doubt how serious the younger boy is.

"It's just a thought Bren, we've made it this far. I just don't want you out of work cos of me. If this is for keeps then we can work it out"

" _If_ this is for keeps? Why doubt us so much? I'm here ain't I?"

"I know, things changed so quickly though. I just want us to be together."

"There is no one else Steven"

Nothing more is said between them in the moments after as they keep each others gaze a while. Ste still lightly tickles the pads of his fingers against Brendan's calf while Brendan's hand hasn't moved off the top of Ste's foot creating a heat upon his skin. Brendan eventually breaks their connection and drifts off in thought again. There is something on his mind and Ste squeezes at his leg to get him to look up.

"Penny for em"

"You'd be rich" Brendan scoffs, necks down his whiskey with a shudder. "Not sure how you'll take it, what I have to say"

"If you're that worried, why tell me. You could keep it to yourself"

Brendan shrugs momentarily. "See I need to tell ye Steven, because despite what ye might think, I want a future with ye in it"

Ste shifts his eyes up instantly, mouth finding a smile. Ste shuffles a little nearer to Brendan. "This the reason you can't sleep?"

Brendan nods. "Remember when ye were a kid, one of your biggest fears is your nightmares coming true right? The monster that hides in the wardrobe, or under the bed. Most parents would tell ye they're not real, or help ye to not be scared anymore. My Da did the opposite and became my living nightmare"

Ste has moved, Brendan hadn't really noticed because it had been so subtle his way of doing it. Edging his body here and there. Ste is about half way to touching him, reaching out. But Brendan doesn't want him too because he'll chicken out.

"Don't...I mean. Just let me say it."

"Okay."

"This one time when he walked into my bedroom, it felt different ye know? Something in the way he stood, his demeanor. Da was drunk, I remember his body was heavy and he reeked of smoke and drink. It hurt me Steven what he did. I knew it was wrong even then and I said no. Repeated that word so many times to him. _No Da_. I felt terrified because he wouldn't hear me say it" Brendan says, his voice dips lower the more he speaks, Ste finds his breath holding when Brendan turns to look directly into Ste's eyes.

"He just ignored me, my tears. Ye know what I kept thinking over the years that followed? When it would end. When he'd just finally hear me and..stop"

Ste feels the moment the colour drains from his face, the icy cold brushing over him like a deathly finger of dread. Ste shuddered and fought a sob in his throat that felt like a knife cutting into him. He felt scared, the fear from Brendan soaking through his pores. Ste watched Brendan silently, waited until he hadn't said anything for a while. Ste wipes the fallen tears from his eyes and pulls himself together.

Ste discards his glass and crawls up the sofa to kneel at Brendan's side. "Can I just..."

Ste removes the empty whiskey glass from his fingers and places it on the table. Opens his arms and kept Brendan's gaze until he'd started to shift and found his place inside Ste's hold. They wrapped together perfectly, close and warm with their body temperature and heat from the slow burning fire in front of them. It crackled and fizzed as it burned the wooden logs. Brendan breathed deeply turning into Ste and letting himself be held while the younger boys' fingers combed through the thick of his hair. In a moment of heightened emotion, Ste felt his chest tighten as if impacted with a hard object. There was nothing he could do to stop the tears he shed and they settled into Brendan's dark hair. Every now and then squeezing his grip tighter Ste couldn't let go.

* * *

As the time passed by, Brendan had moved them and laid down on the sofa, head to the large cushions while Ste had done the same and pressed back fully into him. Tucking his head under Brendan's jaw, Ste lifted their linked hands and watched as his fingers methodically laced in and out between Brendan's own. He focused on it like it was a mirage in a desert he'd just discovered. Brendan was too watching at the movement of it, seemingly calming them both down in an atmosphere that had changed dramatically and cocooned them together in place.

"You must have been so scared" Ste sniffs, brings Brendan's hand to his lips momentarily.

"I was, still have that feeling with him too. I used to wonder what I'd done so bad to deserve it. Like it had been a punishment"

"No, you didn't deserve that" Ste sobs his words, pushes back into Brendan's body, Ste couldn't get close enough to him. "When?"

"I was eight and um..." Brendan blew out a shaky breath, wrapping his body around Ste needing the safety it brought him. "Went on into my teens"

"I want to kill him. He hurt you, and that breaks my heart"

"You're here now, making my life better."

"Why have we wasted so much time fighting ey, we should be trying to be happy no matter what"

"That has never been a problem for us though. You're just a moody sod" Brendan smiles at the gasping protest Ste makes. Brendan leans down to Ste's ear. "I'm happy with ye"

"Have you ever had one of them thoughts...you know like, something really strong in feeling? Something you're so sure of and cannot change?" Ste spoke quietly, his voice just barely audible over the noise from the fire.

"Like an epiphany" Brendan says, moves his thumb against Ste's warm skin. Huddles to be closer to him.

"Think so. He will never hurt you again. Because I just know I'll always protect you now, for all of your life."

Brendan curls his hand tightly and stops the motion of Ste's fingers. It draws both their eyes together. Ste watches the fire light shine brightly within Brendan's eyes and the glaze that covers his dilated pupils. Ste twists his head up and softly cups his mouth against Brendan's parting lips. Slow and intimate kisses that only last a second or so each time.

 _"Thank ye"_ Brendan whispers.

* * *

Ste fluttered open his eyes, slightly lethargic with sleep, his eyelids heavy and breathing shallow. Ste processed the view around him with confusion. The fire still smoldering lingered a warmth around the room. Ste knew he wasn't alone, despite the extra heat beside him there was a steady heartbeat in his ear and a gentle breathing in the air.

It dawned on him mostly though, how he'd managed sleep. For the first time in so long he was over tired and sluggish in feeling. His fingers skimmed over the hand settled on his hip startling him to look down, turn back to look at Brendan still asleep on the sofa. Ste doesn't know when they'd fallen asleep, he remembered them talking, and how Brendan had confessed intimate secrets from his childhood that still now made him ache inside.

Ste thought better of drifting his finger tips against Brendan's lips because didn't want to move in fear he'd disturb him, Brendan looked peaceful laid there, handsome. Ste rubbed his sight clearer, debating whether to fall back asleep. Instead he kept quiet and snuggled down properly, closer to Brendan's body, it encourages the older man to grunt and move. His arm tightens around Ste and across his stomach leaving him smiling.

Another hour passes, Ste drifts in and out of sleep, fingers now lacing Brendan's and far to comfortable to notice when Brendan stirs awake. He himself going through the steps of processing where he is, why he's on the the sofa but mostly, who he's with.

Brendan moves his arm, tries to wriggle away.

"Don't ya even dare." Ste says, grabs Brendan's hand and pulls it back. "I were proper comfy then"

Brendan scoffs lightly, starts to relax his arm again. "Can't disturb that then can we? Did ye sleep any?" Brendan asks with a yawn added to his voice.

"Yep, wasn't too bad. Guess we talked for hours though. Maybe that's our cure"

"Me rabbiting on about my childhood? Doubt that Steven. Less said the better"

"Hey, you can talk about anything to me. An as long as ya want. Why do I still feel so knackered though? Like I've run a mile?"

"Body ain't used to it I guess. I'm still feeling it too, groggy"

"That's the whiskey"

"Says ye, whole bottle of wine. I saw ye, all tipsy and cheeks all rosy red. A bit like the way they're shading now in fact, maybe it's waking up to me"

"That's the best part init?" Ste strokes his warming face, grin on his lips. "I don't usually drink so much wine, prefer beer. Bren, you okay? I don't want to upset ya so soon after waking up but I need to ask"

"I'm better thanks to ye. Listening to me, it meant a lot. Plus I ain't the biggest talker usually"

"Well I make up for that, always talking. Probably need to shut up."

"No ye don't, I like it. Calms me down" Brendan says with a chuckle. "How long have ye been awake?"

"About an hour, I think I drifted back to sleep a couple times like, but in any case, didn't want to move. You're all toasty. We shouldn't have left the fire burning though. I'll give it a good poke in a minute"

"Oh right, that my cue to leave the room then?"

"Ey? Oh very funny. I'll get you, with that poker"

Brendan's laughter rumbles through Ste's body leaving the young boy to chuckle too. He looks around the room, eyes settling on the kitchen. "You hungry? I could make us somet, but I quite fancy going out somewhere for breakie." Ste looked back up at Brendan "Up for it? An my treat too, least I can do after all this"

"Ye sure? I have a big appetite."

"I had noticed."

Brendan lowers his hands to Ste's sides, tickles his rib cage and gets him giggling. "Ye go get a shower, I'll make the coffee."

"Okay" Ste agrees and stretches out his body before moving. He stops before rising and looks back at Brendan thoughtfully.

"Forget something?"

"Yeah." Ste leans down towards Brendan, hesitates before kissing him. It's a chased one but Ste's lips are full and soft on his. Their lips click on parting. "I liked waking up to you"

"Felt right, didn't it?" Brendan replies, thumbs along Ste's cheek gently. Places his lips against Ste's again, keeps it slow it between them. Ste parts his mouth and takes Brendan's bottom lip into his mouth, feels drunk with the caressed kiss. Brendan smiles when they part and touches Ste's face to open his eyes. "Go have a shower"

"Okay...see you in a bit" Ste smiles softly and leaves for the bathroom. Brendan's eyes trail after the young boy and when he's out of sight his eyes close and his head falls back hard on the sofa. He lays there staring at the smoldering fire and wonders why Ste was brought into his life for there to be so many barriers in the way for them.

Stood in the kitchen Brendan could hear the shower water spraying and Ste humming a tune whilst under it. It left him smiling while he made them both a drink. Not knowing how Ste wanted his coffee, Brendan moved to the bathroom to ask, the door slightly ajar, his eyes flickered up to look between the gap, the shower in full view and the pink blurry silhouette of Ste in there.

Brendan swallowed deeply, imagination running wild.

"Bren?"

Brendan startled, stood stiffly and cleared his throat. "I um...how do ye want your coffee?"

"Hang on a mo, I've finished" Ste replied switching off the shower he held out an arm. "Pass me a towel will ya?"

Brendan pushed open the door having to enter the bathroom to grab a fluffy white towel and on passing it to Ste he turned looking away.

"You're not shy are ya?" Ste asked gleefully. Brendan turned to look at Ste standing there, towel laying perfectly against his hips, bronzed skin covered in droplets and a high shine from the water. The older man gazed in awe at him, licked his lips. Ste curled the corner of his bottom lip under his teeth. "Bren are ya alright?"

"I'm fabulous. Ye look...clean" Brendan had flushed, the occurrence so rare he blamed the steam in the room for the sudden temperature change within him. Ste was delighted standing there with his beauty and smugness.

"Clean? Wow, there's a compliment, ta. You look _tempted_."

"Always am around ye"

Ste beamed. "Milk, one sugar – in me coffee"

"I'll..." Brendan thumbed back at the door, eyes lingering on Ste before leaving. Ste chuckles half embarrassed half elated at the reaction he got from Brendan.

"Obvs me dressed this way distracts you" Ste spoke surprising Brendan to turn around in the kitchen. Ste was still in his towel only this time he'd tucked his thumb into the hem dragging the white towel down to reveal his lower stomach and the dark pubic hair trimmed against his groin. Brendan heated.

"Jesus boy, don't be walking around like that."

"Why not?" Ste inquired innocently, hands gripping around his coffee, he leaned against the counter. Brendan watched a droplet of water snake down his chest.

"Because, I can't keep my eyes off ye"

"Noticed" Ste grinned blowing a cool ripple over his brew. "Ya tongue is flapping"

"Those are some legs you've got there"

Ste looked down on his thick wet hair against his legs. "They're hairy huh?"

Brendan hums laying his eyes over Ste "Ye know two can play this dirty."

"And hopefully _all_ weekend"

Brendan shook his head, smirk lifting his moustache. "I am off to have a shower"

"Best make it a cold one ey. Seen as ya so hot an bothered thanks to this" Ste gestured to his body, laughter leaving his mouth. "I'll be through later, might forget how ya have your coffee too"

Brendan moved closer into Ste's space, both their eyes meeting together. His thumb stroked against Ste's wingspan tattoo taking the wet off it and leaving Ste holding a breath. "Insinuating I did that on purpose?"

Ste nods cheekily, places his brew down and holds Brendan's hand, puts it on his body dragging his palm up his chest. "You saw me in there and pictured me naked beneath you, open and wanting" Ste's voice purrs, eyes fixed on Brendan and lets go. The older man traces his finger tips on Ste with heart stopping tenderness, enough to close Ste's eyes in a flutter. His palm slides through the wet glaze the shower water has left on Ste's upper torso, explores the texture of his soft skin and thumbs across his hardened nipple.

 _"You're fuckin' perfect ye know that?"_ Brendan groans intensely against Ste's skin, licks the water off his elongated neck. Ste's fingers pull tightly through Brendan's hair, breath juddering with soft moans. He feels Brendan's hand work through the towel parting, lifting it up. His fingers slipping on the wet of his thigh, they creep high and curve the damp heat of Ste's ball's.

"Reckon I might need this towel back, couldn't see any others" Brendan angled his head eyes on Ste's mouth expanding in smile.

"If I take this off, you gotta keep ya eyes closed" Ste edged forward into Brendan's space encourages his hand to hold the weight of his ball sack. Ste side steps a little to open his legs so Brendan's palm can slip further. Ste is breathy sucking Brendan's tongue inside his mouth, arms helping to lift him off the flat of his feet.

 _"You're trembling"_ Brendan breathes his words down Ste's ear, feels his way between Ste's thighs and plays enough to roughen Ste's kissing response jolting them back hard against the counter.

 _"Bren..."_ Ste hitches a breath as they stumble apart.

"Such a shame we're going out. _"_ Brendan jokes, his grin wide. "To be continued, beautiful. I'll be back soon" Brendan sealed his promise with a longing kiss Ste chased after.

 _"Make sure you are"_ Ste demanded willfully catching breaths, his fingers clawed the counter behind him for balance while his cock bucked gently moving the towel he wore. "This is your doing!" Ste shouted back jokingly to a winking Brendan who left the room feeling smug. Ste's heart beat out an erratic thump behind his chest.

* * *

"Ye ready?" Brendan knocked at the door, pushing it open he edged around to look in the room.

"Yeah, it's still cold out so I should be warm in this" Ste smiled dressed in his jeans and jumper.

"Might want to bring a jacket as well, ye get cold easily don't ye"

Ste paused to look at Brendan, slight fondness in his expression. Brendan protruded his lip a little, eyebrows raising."What did I say?"

"Nothing, I am just wondering when it was you noticed that"

Brendan shook his head absently. "I'm not sure. We did spend a lot of time together before..."

"College got in the way, yeah. Less said about that the better. I'll bring a jacket. Are we going out on the water?"

"Yep, after breakfast, they'll be a boat ride somewhere. Whatever ye want to do, but first, my stomach is growling. Ye gonna get me fed or what?"

"Come on then, jeez I forgot ya still a growin' man ain't ya? You'll waste away. You're driving though."

"I'll have to teach ye one day, you can chauffeur me around instead."

"Deal, I'll practice in your car then shall I?" Ste laughed when Brendan's face drops a mile, apparently lacking humour when it came to his car. Ste reckoned he'd change that over the course of time though and believed the older man could be tamed easily with gentle persuasion. They left the log cabin allowing the cold from the harsh winter to shiver through them. A few people wandered around, up early for breakfast too Ste guessed. The car was hotter inside so he let down the window and gazed out over The Isle of Wight. Ste sighed gently at the view before him.

"Thank you for bringing us here."

"I thought you'd like it, teaching has taken me to a few places, been lucky."

"Doesn't it annoy ya though, never stopping in one place? Like instead of moving around you could settle down for a change. What if one day you're asked to go further away, like too far away" Ste speaks as he looks out of the widow, his mind whirring with his own thoughts. "Cos ya get asked to teach all over, you might have to move."

"Well I wouldn't though now, would I?"

"Why not?" Ste asks, turns to see Brendan looking at him.

"Because that would mean leaving ye behind. Let's find a quiet cafe"

Brendan set off out of the holiday park and traveled into the local town center. They parked up and walked to find a cafe to have their breakfast at. Brendan didn't speak much so Ste kept quiet himself and they ate in a comfortable silence every now and then catching each others eyes and smiling. As the morning progressed more people began to turn out and fill the quaint cafe so they left and wandered around the shops.

Ste stopped in one and picked up a few souvenirs for his friends, he'd never really been away anywhere before, so he wanted a reminder of the place. Brendan looked uncomfortable accompanying him, he guessed shopping wasn't really his thing. "Why don't ya meet me outside, I just wanna buy these. Do ya want owt for your sister?"

"No, I wouldn't know what to even buy her to be honest. But I will meet ye outside. I could see if I can find us a boat trip like ye wanted"

"Let me give ya some money for it then, ya ain't paying for everything"

"Put your money away, you're my guest. And besides as I can't cook, gonna need your culinary skills while we're here. Sort our food, drinks? That way ye can contribute to our little trip" He watches Ste consider his suggestion, nibbling his bottom lip the way he does. The habit becoming more enticing to Brendan the more he sees it.

"Ya not gonna get away with that forever, especially when I teach you some things. But fine, I'll do that then, you'd probably burn stuff anyway" Ste argues lightly, finds himself closer to Brendan than ever, their eyes never tire of just looking at each other.

"Ye have seen me in the kitchen, I didn't burn the pudding did I? I like you've considered forever in your attempt to teach me though. Does that mean you're sticking around?"

"I'd planned on it, yeah."

"Excuse me" A woman speaks faintly behind them. Ste looks around first and realises they're holding up the queue. Brendan makes a show of peeling his eyes off him before he leaves. Like it's the hardest challenge in his life.

"Wow, you two are sweet" The woman smiles taking Ste's items from his hands and continues. "Been together years I bet"

"Me an Brendan? Naah, it's well complicated actually. _Just friends_." Ste inverts his fingers in gesture, they were a lot more than that, but had still failed to put it into full practice. Ste's mind distracted him briefly before he re engaged the lady again.

"Sorry but, it's more than that for him. He loses himself in your eyes, like there's never been another soul on earth before you."

"Can't say I've noticed" Ste says, the blush in his cheeks tell a different tale though and the shop assistant smiles just before giving him his change.

Ste looks around for Brendan upon leaving the shop and sees him talking with a man a bit further up the road. He's young like him, and he's smiling, laughing. He feels it in his stomach, the twisted dull pain that knocks him sick. Brendan looks up in that instant and Ste turns and walks the opposite way hating how weak his insecurity leaves him. Brendan is left confused following to catch up.

"Hey" Brendan grabs Ste by the arm. "You're going the wrong way, boats' back here"

Ste turns to look at Brendan "Thought you were busy."

"Busy how?" Brendan asks, but soon cottons on following Ste's line of sight to the stranger he'd spoken with. "The bloke was asking the time and whether I knew the name of a hotel he's looking for."

"Thought it was funny did he" Ste replied flatly "The time?"

"Steven" Brendan toys his finger along Ste's jacket collar, glorious grin adorning his face. "Ye always gonna be so jealous"

"No. Wasn't that" Ste lets out a low scoff, annoyed by the absurdity. As he begins to walk back the right way, Brendan hurries his movements to catch up and bumps softly into him as they walk.

"Ye seem to forget I asked ye to come here with me. Think that's pretty explanatory."

"Like you've never been like this over me." Ste flicks his eyes to Brendan, catches his grin. "Stop it"

"Ye look good envious" Brendan says, laughs as Ste shoves at him. "Let's get this boat trip out of the way so I can get ye alone again"

"Oh right" Ste widens his smile. "Like that is it"

"I still have that image of ye from this morning to think about so" Brendan says coolly, turning back with eyes raking over Ste's beauty. "Liking the way I touched ye"

"More than liked" Ste accepts Brendan's timely kiss with a slight part of his lips. "Come on then"

Ste looked happy with himself, with most of it directed at Brendan. Ste's hand twitched by his side, heart debating on whether or not to reach out to Brendan's. It was his head that won out in the end, fearing it was too soon between them for such an intimate gesture. Instead he captured as many smiles as he could and made Brendan laugh at each moment possible taking a mental picture of the way his face lit up with it. Ste wondered if the older man could see the twinkle in his eye and the obvious feelings he had for him.

* * *

It's early evening when they finally get the boat ride they'd talked about. Touring the isle in the car and on foot they had stopped to dine in a restaurant for lunch. They're on the deck of the boat now and because it's winter the evenings draw in quicker and leave an icy chill in the air. Bright misty aura covers the moon and stars against the dark night sky. Ste's breath swirls from his mouth like steam while he towers above Brendan, the older man down on his forearms, leaning against the cool metal sides. He looks out and doesn't focus on anything in particular. Brendan hangs on Ste's words whenever he speaks and has done the whole day.

"Did you ever, did you ever think about telling someone?" Ste asks as he gazes out at the moonlit sparkled water splashing up the sides of the boat.

"Yeah I did. But I was so young, didn't think anyone would listen to me. My Da was a powerful man and they listened to him instead"

"I think he just made out he was that way. Put the fear of it in you, when in fact he was the weakest among you all. Doing that to a little boy, but more than that, his son. There's no justification. It's senseless and wicked. He should be rotting Brendan"

"The drinking finally caught up on him and now he's paying for it. I hope he suffers and I hate hearing myself wish hurt on anyone because I know what it's like. But he...what he did. It hurt me physically, emotionally. Screwed me up I guess"

"Evil sod. I hate him." Ste gripped the sides of the boat hard enough to whiten his knuckles. Brendan looked at them and stretched his hand across to relax them again. He was glad Ste was with him now.

"He's in Ireland then, with Cheryl"

Brendan nods and looks back at Ste "Hm, in Dublin. Has that pub I mentioned there, too ill to run it now though. Chez said he wanted me to look after it now he's ill. Wanted me to run the pub for him. No chance that was happening of course. Chez tried to talk me round but I ain't doing that. I left Ireland to get away from him, not going back now"

Brendan pushes off the metal side and walks off. Ste breathes heavy watching him, sadness in his eyes. He waits a few moments, pushes off the side himself and searches for Brendan. Ste finds him sat at the bar below deck, glass of whiskey in his hand he throws back the drink in one go slamming the glass back down he orders another one.

"Right, that's your lot" Ste holds his hand over Brendan's money. "Two black coffees please"

"You're having one too?"

"Nope, you are drinking both"

"Make it a double whiskey and you're on " Brendan says, his eyes forward when Ste glances at him.

"Ya having the coffee and that's an end to it. Remember which one of us is driving" Ste looks at the bartender. "I'll have a beer and some nuts"

"Good to know ye like them Steven" Brendan's eyes keep Ste's long enough to see his cheeks pink. His lips smile around the rim of the cup as he drinks the coffee.

"What can I do to make you feel better. Tell me an I'd do it."

"Ye already are. No one else knows, probably best I ain't advertising to the world how damaged I am."

"You are not that. You are kind, funny, generous. You are my favourite person, I could listen to ya all day and never get bored." Ste tilts Brendan's face towards him, runs his thumb through his beard hair. Brendan watches his Adams apple bob as Ste swallows. "I'd let myself fall for you because it's all I'd need now. To love you is enough for me."

"Steven, don't..." Brendan whispers, holds a breath.

"It's too late, and you know it. I don't care, I've got you in here." Ste holds Brendan's hand to his chest, lets him feel the beat of it. The older man fleets a smile curves his fingers against his top.

"I'm already lucky then ey? Here, give us some of those peanuts." Brendan scoops some from the packet crunches them his mouth. "Jesus, meal in a bag that"

Ste shrugs and continues to munch on the snack. "I like em. I've gone an made things weird haven't I?" Ste sighs.

"Ye haven't." Brendan says, standing to tower over Ste. He latches onto his mouth and kisses him, thumbs both sides of Ste's face pulling him closer to deepen his tongue strokes. Ste's lashes flicker as they heighten while Brendan brushes against his flushed lips. "I do think we should get back once we dock though. Get the fire going again, and this body of yours warmed up." Brendan rubs down Ste's arms quickly transferring some warmth into a smiling Ste.

"I'll make you something to eat." Ste suggests, and crowds closer to Brendan. "No interruptions cos I've plans for us"

"Oh yeah, ye gonna disclose your intentions?" Brendan asked with a low voice as Ste's full lips softened under his kisses.

"Best not, we're in public" Ste gripped his arms around Brendan's neck, could feel the room gazing at them but he was too far lost in Brendan to care any. "This boat needs to hurry up before we're kicked off for indecency."

"Am I not allowed to kiss my boy in public?"

"Boyfriend?" Ste nibbled nervously at the corner of his mouth. "Cos it's what I'd like...us proper boyfriends"

"Yeah, okay. Okay" Brendan nodded with a smile.


	7. Chapter 7

Thank you for the lovely reviews and messages for this story. Happy New Year to you all :) xx

* * *

The Boy Next Door

Part 7

They're not through the door five minutes before Brendan is wrangling his arms around Ste's waist capturing him in a tight hold that leaves them both smiling. Ste tries to move himself through to the kitchen but the task proves harder with Brendan wrapped around him, lips making themselves firmly at home against the pulse of his neck.

"Bren..." Ste stutters feeling light headed, willfully melting into the persuasive contact of Brendan. "You'll have to let go of me if ya wanna eat tonight"

"There's me thinking my charm was working here." Brendan smiles into the slope of Ste's neck.

Ste turns around and licks his lips, stretches his arms around Brendan's neck to draw him in closer. "I think you'll find, it's _me_ that has charmed _you_ " Ste spoke softly as he captured Brendan's sapphire shine eyes. Ste's head angled to one side while Brendan settled back once more between his shoulder and neck.

"Ain't that the truth"

"You seem a lot happier" Ste said, feeling weightless with Brendan so close to him. He stroked his hand at the back of his head, fingers coming to rest on Brendan's neck.

"I am" Brendan said resolutely. "I think it's us, finally getting somewhere."

"Tony said that to me, said we'd find our way and we are doing."

"Yeah, we are. Can't be complacent though, we have to remain cautious at college"

"Bren, don't. Not while we're here" Ste shakes his head and turns to move away and Brendan hears the twist in his voice, the hurt.

"No, you're right. Let's start again, I've told Anne, look" Brendan fishes out his phone and shows Ste the message he sent and the many replies she'd returned. Ste starts to thaw then, smiles as he reaches for his own phone and shows off the messages to all his friends.

"I texted them in the car" Ste nibbles at his bottom lip "Supposed to share good news ain't ya"

"Jesus, blabbermouth" They both laugh and Ste shoves Brendan backwards with a fake gasp. "I'm kidding, it's good news"

"Go light the fire and I'll make us some something to eat"

Brendan obediently agrees, but not before teasing his hands around Ste's bum. "Ye look good enough to eat"

"Yeah, but..." Ste is cut off with a kiss. Brendan pulls his waist with a jerk sealing them together. Ste chuckles and clearly enjoys it heightening to his tip toes. "You're a distraction I could do without, while I'm in the kitchen at least"

"This the time to remind ye about earlier this morning and the fun we had in here? How ye wanted my attention then?"

"Not listening" Ste's cheeks pinked at the thought, he turned Brendan around sharpish banishing the older man from the kitchen while he prepared their food.

* * *

"I'm stuffed me, couldn't eat another thing" Ste said falling against the large cushioned couch, lays his head back heavy.

"Tasted great Steven, ye got a talent there" Brendan replied and settled back himself, rubs his tummy.

"Aw, ta. Dead easy, I'll show ya"

"Might sleep like babies again tonight"

"Not on here again though" Ste patted the cushions they sat on. "I missed a bed to stretch out in"

"You're the length of this sofa Steven"

"Yeah but can't properly splay out with you on here too. Fall off the edge wouldn't I?"

"Tryin' to tell me I'm in the way now, is that it?" Brendan raised his eyebrows half amused half exasperated.

"No I didn't say that..." Ste nudges Brendan seeing the grin spreading his mouth. Ste shuffles closer to Brendan, leans his head against his arm and buries his cheek into the cotton soft material. Brendan was always warm to the touch, even on his bare skin. Ste took his hand to his wrist and stroked along it, smiling with the heat.

"Ye tired now, had a long day haven't we?"

"Wouldn't matter if I was, don't want to sleep when you're with me" Ste lifts his head up and sees Brendan looking down upon him. "I'd miss this if I did. Had a brilliant day"

"Good to hear it" Brendan said, then watches Ste jump off the sofa. He brings back various things from the kitchen including a bag of marshmallows. Brendan watches the bag land in his lap. "Dare I ask?"

"Right, I've always wanted to toast marshmallows on a fire. So..." Ste sits down on the thick pile carpet on the floor and pats at the side of him.

"Seriously? I thought ye were stuffed?"

"It's a marshmallow Brendan. Come on, sit back against the front of the sofa if ya must" Ste shoves some mallows on the end of a wooden stick and holds them in the fire to toast. "Wonder how long ya leave them for"

"If it incinerates on the stick then you'll have guaranteed over done it" Brendan drawled, pushing himself onto the floor. Ste frowns unamused at him and passes a perfectly toasted mallow to eat.

"Actually tastes alright." Ste hums eating his. "Feels a little like Christmas this, reckon it's the decor in here and snow outside. Just need chestnuts roastin' too."

"You'll be bursting into song next" Brendan said distastefully, resting his head back on the sofa behind him.

Ste turned to face Brendan who stared at the ceiling. "Ya don't like Christmas?"

"Not a fan of it, no" Brendan answered flatly and paused to think a moment. "Don''t think I'm a scrooge, just mine weren't the kind to embrace as a kid. Seamus was worse this time of year."

Ste kept his sight on Brendan who continued to look at the ceiling. Ste felt a shift in his heartbeat, an unease watching him and wondering what thoughts Brendan was going through. Ste held out his hand and touched him in comfort.

"Well you ain't spending it alone. You could come to ours, we usually have a big meal that Tony makes with all the trimmings so there's always loads to eat, gonna have a huge tree an presents."

"I don't know Steven, it's not really me. Chez tries to get me to go over there every year, I've talked my way out of Christmas many times. Just another day."

Ste settles back with Brendan and they both look up at the ceiling now. "Do you buy presents for your kids?"

"Yeah, and birthday's too. Well, I send them money. I barely know them Steven, wouldn't know what to buy. I doubt they are bothered, would ye be?"

"Don't do that" Ste lays his head to one side and focuses on Brendan. "Don't make yourself out to be bad. At least you're thinking about em'. Maybe one day you could even visit again. Could come with you, if it meant you feeling better"

"Christ, are ye always this positive? Stop making it sound that easy will ye" Brendan snapped a little feeling a knot inside his stomach he suspected was guilt. He could feel the tension within Ste brewing.

"Stop being an idiot Brendan, I were just saying it might not be so bad seeing them again, it would bring back your smile wouldn't it? Having them back in your life again. What second chances are made for, even you've said that. And another thing, be prepared to take what ya dish out cause you've met your match with me right. I won't roll over and accept it." Ste bit back and gained all of Brendan's attention on him. The faintest smirk flashed over Brendan's mouth.

"Wouldn't expect anything less. You're the only person I've met that makes me feel I could do anything, be anything ye know that? Guilty as charged with the idiot too, fair play."

"Best apology I ever had" Ste chuckled. They both stayed laid with their faces on one side, eyes searching each others.

"All this study, these past, nearly two years. Ye have a plan at the end of it Steven?"

"Hmm" Ste nodded, he looks up at the ceiling again. "Reckon I'll go travelling, always wanted to do that. Go for like months at a time"

"Oh, right. Good." Brendan replies, he lays his head back again and goes quiet. Ste smirks noting him a lot more fidgety. "Months ye say. Bit hasty no? Long time away from home that, might get homesick"

"Nah, I never get homesick. Gonna love it me" Ste's smile widens.

"You'd never get homesick?"

Ste sits up and looks at Brendan. "Nope. So what about you Bren? Are you always gonna be a teacher?"

"It wasn't what I'd planned to be. I'd like my own business. My own money, time. Something I could build up from scratch and put my mark on ye know?" Brendan sits up himself now and looks at Ste.

"Being your own boss" Ste replies with a nod of his head, he holds more marshmallows into the fire. "You are good at bar work, I could watch ya do that all day actually, nice tight fitting suit on"

"Yeah? How about getting behind the bar to help out instead of propping it up?" Brendan laughs.

"So teach me then" Ste said with a shrug, but he surprised himself at how serious he'd meant it. An idea soon became an image in his mind and then a possibility looking back at Brendan.

"Maybe I will" Brendan replied thoughtfully. "I remember when my Da gave me work in the pub, about fourteen I was. I enjoyed getting out of the house, the feeling of self worth having a job. I wanted to make him proud instead of hating me. Turns out no amount of effort could be enough"

"I'm sorry. I just, I wanna know you. Every memory and dream" Ste's eyes dart with Brendan's "I wish the memories weren't all darkened by him. He had no right to do that."

"Not all of them are, and I will tell ye everything. I'm more interested in the new ones we are gonna create together. Like the time we toasted marshmallows and ye set them on fire because you're too busy staring at me to notice..."

"What...? Oh, bloody hell!" Ste laughs at the burnt melted mess the sweet has made. He chucks the wooden stick into the fire shrugging his shoulders and turning back to look at Brendan laughing at him. Ste smiles, his hand maps over Brendan's cool cotton shirt and feels the shape of the strong body underneath.

"At least we got to try one"

"Yep. Don't give up your day job just yet" Brendan winks

"Maybe you'd let me work for you, when you get this new enterprise up and running. Imagine how cool it would be to work together" Ste moves and sits astride Brendan's lap and curls his hands around the sides of his neck. "Could have our own rules then"

"I'd never get any work done, too many distractions" Brendan said, taking his hands down to Ste's waist pinching his t shirt into his fingers and dragging it up. Ste smirked and held his arms high enough Brendan could pull it off him discarding it with a flick of his wrist. Brendan took in the bronzed skin of Ste's torso and buried his face beneath his jaw, breathed in his scent. "Thought ye were off 'travelling'"

"You're easy to wind up" Ste sighs and closes his eyes, combs his fingers through Brendan's dark hair. "Not decided yet. I have a job, some savings and the college wasn't planned. A bit like your teaching career" Ste holds Brendan back and dips down leaving a small kiss on his lips.

"Anyway, as it's almost Christmas, ask me what I want"

"What do ye want for Christmas Steven?"

"You. Gonna make my wish come true?" Ste brushes the tips of his fingers down Brendan's neck, keeping their gaze unbroken.

"I'm not just for Christmas"

"Lucky me. I have a gift for you" Ste turns so Brendan follows his gaze to the things Ste placed on the table. "Remember when you said you were curious about body shots?"

"Vaguely. Didn't ye have fangs at the time and a killer Vampire costume on?" Brendan moves his eyes back to Ste.

"Dracula, and I didn't pack it"

"Ye still bite anyway, where'd ye find the tequila?"

"I picked up the ingredients on the boat, at the bar. Just for fun init, a few?" Ste reached over to grab the small bottle and filled two shot glasses.

"One and that's it, I want to be sober around ye not half cut." Ste is shifted slowly, moved and laid down on the carpet. Brendan hangs just above him and marvels at his beauty. Ste's breathing is heavy, inverting his stomach allowing Brendan's hand to settle inside the dip.

"Two... Just wanting your hands on me as soon as possible"

"I'm more interested in using my tongue on ye, close your eyes"

"Swear you're doing this on purpose" Ste closes his eyes and parts his mouth when a piece of lemon is stroked against his lips. Blowing out a long chiseled breath, Ste sucks the citrus juice, almost swallows it as Brendan's tongue laps up some salt from his chest and pours the tequila over his body. The droplets run against a nipple and down his waist to almost drench the carpet. Brendan rescues the liquid with his tongue, then his warm mouth. Ste can feel Brendan's moustashe brush against his side, the burn of his beard and the open mouthed kiss on his skin.

Ste parts his lips angling his head so the lemon juice can run down Brendan's tongue while they kiss and then Ste opens his eyes. Brendan hovers their mouths untouched and takes the the lemon squeezing droplets over his nipple. The cool juice leaving Ste stuttering breath when Brendan's thumb draws a circle around the nub. His gaze lowered down his damp skin and to Ste's growing erection. Brendan eyed Ste's responses in hunger and hooked his fingers dragging down Ste's tracksuit bottoms. Ste kicked them off unfurling his legs to trap Brendan inside them.

Brendan thumbs up his covered dick and presses hard on it, moves up higher and latches his wide mouth to Ste's nipples, circles his tongue there and hardens the peaks. Brendan continued to map each curve and dip on Ste flattening his hand underneath his boxers to gently brush the hair on his ball sack and finger up his length.

 _"God..."_ Ste moans, feels his cock thicken and leak pre come between Brendan's nimble fingers as he licks his skin clean and brushes the bristles of moustashe and beard hair along his body. _"Bren..."_

"Not bad, it certainly makes the drink more appealing" Brendan admits letting go and leaving Ste in a hot mess. "Ye okay Steven, looking a little flushed"

"Loving this ain't ya" Ste spoke lowly, felt a sheen of sweat map his body.

"Ye know what ye did?" Brendan asked thickly, swallowed gazing into Ste's lust filled eyes. Brendan was hard, the thick length of him tightly bound his boxers and jeans against his skin.

"Yeah, reckon I do" Ste nodded, licks his lips and slowly felt his way down Brendan's body. Stopping at his belt buckle and yanking at it harshly until it hangs open, Ste thumbs against the button and takes down the zipper. His fingers grip the material of Brendan's shirt out and dragged it loose, watches Brendan's eyes zigzag with anticipation as he claws a path up his treasure trail.

Palm wide and settled, Ste shoved Brendan onto the floor, straddles him and sits down against his groin. Ste can feel the thick shape of him through the boxers they wear, against his balls when he rolls his hips up and down, Brendan is big and long and knowing quickens his heartbeat. The blush blossoms his cheeks hot and crimson. He knows Brendan is staring intently, like he can read his mind.

They meet open-mouthed in a kiss that left them breathless. Ste croaks Brendan's name feeling lightheaded and wanting to crawl beneath his skin taking his fingernails over the black shirt he wore. The buttons were undone and the tequila poured over Brendan's chest. It soaks into his dark hair and glistens in the fire glow. Ste licks the salt off his own wrist and dips down to lap the drink from Brendan's body. His hips roll heavily and Brendan's hands pinch hard around Ste's thighs rutting them together while Ste sucks on the lemon and lingers his tongue inside Brendan's mouth.

"So hot" Ste whispers parting their lips, his pelvis grinds down on Brendan while his nails score the sides of his body. "I like you hard"

"Fuck, Steven..." Brendan grits his teeth and tilts his hips. Writhes while Ste sucks and teases his nipples. The scrape of his teeth leaves a soft reddening glow to suck upon, strong taste of tequila still burning the wide of his mouth. Ste is curling the tip of his tongue inside Brendan's belly button when the older man twists them suddenly. Pulls Ste up to sit over him while he kneels.

"I want to hear ye come" Brendan husked, his breathing is fractured as his eyes fix on Ste still absently suckling some lemon between his flushed lips. He throws it on the table biting playfully on Brendan's bottom lip and strokes down his wrist.

 _"Make me"_ Ste whispers, guides Brendan's hand inside his boxers allowing his dick to cushion between his palm.

Brendan's hand tightens and has Ste rearing hot and hard against him. They kiss unsteadily mixing hot breaths and moans, Ste rolled his wet tongue with Brendan's while his cock slid inside and out of his fingers. Brendan pulls them apart, Ste's hair caught in his other hand, he feels the throb of Ste against the pad of his thumb as he draws faint circles to moisten the head almost causing Ste to lose balance lost in arousal.

He wants to suck him, take Ste's dick in his mouth and taste the hot wet he can feel inside his palm. Brendan can't take his eyes off Ste though, his mouth as it widens the closer he gets. The tighten of his stomach muscles against Brendan's wrist as it brushes the lithe hairs on his treasure trail. Ste throws his head back convulsing through his climax, is loud while Brendan milks his comedown with a clenched fist.

"Thought ye said body shots." Brendan chuckled, his chest rises and falls heavy. "That's heavy petting in my book"

"That's bloody wonderful in mine." Ste tells him letting out a long breathy laugh. His head drops down between Brendan's shoulder and hand strokes the back of his neck. "What about you?"

"I already got what I wanted. So, what now?"

"Watch some tele?" Ste suggests as he moves off Brendan. "Just gonna clean up."

"Absolutely" Brendan rounds his head "TV the perfect compliment to that"

Brendan finds himself wrapped around the head with a damp cloth and a honking laughter that fills the room and his heart. They clean up and settle together on the sofa again and after winning the battle with the remote, Brendan flashes a smile beginning to channel hop. Ste lays over him trying to grasp the remote in his hand but Brendan won't let him have it. He holds it higher, further away and Ste clambers until he's almost straddling with Brendan's body. Their eyes meet and dart, belly laughter turning to silent grins, then smiles. Ste drops his smile to lick his lips, the tip of his tongue wetting them apart.

Brendan lowers against Ste with his parted mouth, one kiss becomes two then three, tentative and encouraging. Ste kisses back on the third and claws his way higher when Brendan drops the remote and moves around, brings up his legs on the cushions so Ste can lay his body recumbent over him. Feeling Brendan still hard beneath him encourages Ste to feed down beneath his boxers and take his thick cock in hand. Ste pulls hard and delights at the swell inside his palm.

"Gonna want to do this a lot tonight, make you come" Ste squeezes the head of Brendan's cock, flicks his wrist gently tugging on it. "Am I talking too much?"

"No, _fuck_...I like it... _come here_ " Brendan fans his fingers through the back of Ste's hair and drags him to his mouth, loses himself in the kiss they share. Feeling constricted by his jeans Brendan wriggles to get out of them, Ste guides them off and takes the hem of his boxers lower, dipping down to lick Brendan's cock, Ste tastes him. Brendan bucks off the sofa incoherently calling Ste's name and looks down at him feathering open lips at his dick.

Ste repeats another slow lick, the tip of his tongue laying between the slit and goes down on Brendan, takes the thick length of him inside his mouth stealing breaths from Brendan's lungs as he sucks hard. Ste edges back up holding his hand tight again, the drag easier with the saliva and settles his chest flush with Brendan's.

"Better when wet init, and the sounds it makes as I do this" Ste teased, jerking Brendan off quicker. "Are you close?"

"I am now ye sexy fuck"

Ste honks out his laughter and bites down on the corner of his mouth feeling turned on by them this way. It consumes him entirely wanting to play out every fantasy he could with him. Ste bites the prickle of Brendan's jawline and milks his cock until the groans coming from him has the heat of Brendan's orgasm filling his hand.

* * *

Ste rolls over in bed and it jolts him awake, the room he's in is very dark and he can only see the faint glow of moonlight through his curtains. Ste grabs his phone and winces at the harsh light burning his eyes to blink until he can focus and look at the time, it's just past two in the morning. Ste puzzles for moments, tiredness wreaking his brain preventing him from thinking properly. He holds his head up and looks at the door, Ste can't remember how he got into bed or even his room. Brendan isn't next to him when he smoothed out his hand on the space beside him, it doesn't feel right and he's awake now.

Ste throws off the covers and pads quickly across the length of his room, the chill of winter is stuck firmly in the air and prickles cold at his body. The hairs on his skin raise and make him shiver as he opens his door. Brendan's room is just along the way and after a moment or two deciding whether to go for it, Ste stands quietly at Brendan's door. Unfortunately for him the door isn't silent when it opens, the mildest of shoves can easily alert the poorest hearing and Brendan's head can clearly be seen angling up as Ste peers around the door.

 _"Are you awake?"_ Ste asks curiously, barely finding a tone loud enough to hear as he continues to edge into the room.

"Yeah" Brendan replies hesitantly "Ye okay?"

"I'm okay. Just can't sleep anymore"

"Me neither. Ye must have been worn out because ye fell asleep on the sofa, so I carried ye to bed"

"Thanks, one little detail Bren, you got the wrong bed" Ste points out quickly and Brendan smiles amused how they'd both realised that together.

Brendan can hear Ste shut the door and then the soft pad of his feet against the carpet, his eyes follow the movement of him. The dip of the mattress indicates he's crawled into his bed and the icy cold fingers that settle on Brendan's leg has the older man gasping and throwing off the sheet.

"What...are ye doing... _you're freezing!"_

"Not my fault, ya know I feel the cold. Don't mind me getting in do ya?"

"Well let's see, you're already in so would it be any good protesting now?" Brendan pauses for breath. "I did think about bringing ye in here, but I'm still a gentleman"

"Well I woke up and it wasn't right you not being there. Plus I were cold."

"Better come here then"

Ste smiles and wraps himself completely around Brendan humming with the heat he provides.

"Jesus, you're like ice" Brendan pulls Ste closer and rubs fiction along his arms and back, down the soft hair on his legs that have locked behind him. Brendan can't stop chuckling. "You're a thief, stealing my warmth"

"You can take it" Ste runs his palms all over him and squeezes Brendan's muscles. He can already feel himself warming up so he relaxes his hold and lays down on the pillow. Face to face the darkness shrouds their eyes.

"It's been really good coming here, feels real now, us" Ste edges to connect their lips. "Being close to you, touching you. I can't stop now"

"Don't stop" Brendan said and moved above Ste, traced his fingers along the sharp of his jawline. Ste smiles as Brendan's arm swept beneath him bringing them together in an unexpected kiss dissipating any doubts in Ste's mind. Ste kicked off the duvet and wrangled his thigh up and around to grip against Brendan's back and yanked them solid with one another. Brendan's breath clearly staggered at the move and deepened his slow kiss, licked against Ste's tongue movements.

They're interrupted suddenly by Brendan's phone buzzing, lighting up the darkness around them. Ste slides away so Brendan can move to answer it.

"It's my sister... Chez? Jesus it's late, have ye seen the time...yeah I'm awake now. Alone?" Brendan pauses and looks back at Ste.

"No, I'm not alone. He's...it's Steven"

Ste's mouth relaxes, eyes fully on Brendan. He traces his thumb over Ste's licked wet lip. "Who else would it be"

Brendan turns away again and listens to his sister try to talk but she's getting herself upset and half the conversation is jumbled up words through tears. "Stop crying...please. I know Da's ill, ye keep reminding me. Get some sleep yeah? I'll talk to ye tomorrow... No, I won't change my mind, Chez. _Chez?!"_

"Christ she hung up on me"

"Bren..." Ste reaches out and pulls Brendan back down so he can lean over him. "What's happened?"

"My Da. It's pretty bad I guess, for her to keep calling me. I hate hearing her cry like that" Brendan shakes his head, blows out a tired sigh. "Chez keeps asking me to see him, but I don't want to"

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to, okay?"

"I keep letting my sister down though. I swore I'd never see that man again when I left. He's poisonous Steven, he poisoned me. Made me like him"

Ste moves and lays over Brendan's chest, caresses the side of his face and brings Brendan back to him. "You are not like him, do you hear me? Nothing at all. It's gonna be alright"

"No...it's not."

"Look around, yeah? It's me and it's you" Ste feels Brendan's arms surround him, brings him against his chest. His heart is beating fast and Ste soothes it back to a normal pace, calming the older man until his breathing relaxes. "Now it will always be alright"

* * *

Despite them both having a restless night, it's Brendan who stirs first the next morning. With a yawn that sucks in his lungs, Brendan's chest feels heavier than normal and when his eyes begin to focus on the soft sunlight through the curtains he can see why. The sun lightens Ste's hair as it travels its beam through it. Asleep, mouth slightly parted, he looks serine laying his body over Brendan's.

His fingers reach over and lift the strands of his hair letting them settle down thicker. It's enough to rouse Ste, who moves like a cat, shakes as he elongates his bronzed body. His pelvis brushes against Brendan's and it's early enough to evoke a reaction in the older man, a sharp release of breath as his groin throbs at the touch.

"Mhh, sorry" Ste speaks low, tired. He flicks his lashes open then closed. "I'll move"

"No" Brendan said watching Ste whose eyes flutter slowly higher. Brendan drifts his lips over Ste's hair. "Stay"

Ste moves up higher, his breath laying a whisper on Brendan's pillow that brushed the lobe of his ear. A fleeting smile graces Ste's lips before subtly tracing Brendan's ear.

"Good morning" Ste breathed, arousal blinking him from the sleepy disposition he needed to wake from. Ste moves again, another teasing inch brushing their sensitive morning erections.

"Morning back" Brendan smiles rocking his open mouth close, ghosts their lips together and kisses Ste intimately. Brendan's hand guides down the thin sheen of sweat on Ste's lower back, fingers palming his boxers down to hold underneath his bum. Ste's eyes dart freely with Brendan's as he feels between his crack and against his hole massaging the muscle. Brendan pulls off his own boxers and leaves Ste to remove his. Ste lifts up his leg and binds them together, inhales a breath at the skin on skin contact.

Ste guides his hands everywhere, fingers tracing each mole and blemish. Ste draws the outline of the cross tattoo on Brendan's arm then takes his flat palm against it and squeezes his bicep. He listens to the relaxed breathing of Brendan while he does, inhaling deeply turning them slightly and letting his weight push down on Ste. He loves it, how heavy Brendan's body is on his slender frame.

"I could so get used to this" Ste gushes into Brendan's ear. Placing his knee between Brendan's thighs. "Ain't never leaving this place now, I'm keeping you to myself forever"

"Is that right?" Brendan smiles and finds Ste's hand, brings it around to his front, guides Ste through his treasure trail. Brendan's cock is hard and long as Ste fingers over it.

"I want this, you, inside me." Ste bites softly over Brendan's shoulder.

"I want ye in my bed first"

"Brendan, I am in your bed" Ste moves his palm up and down his cock, squeezes.

"This is not _my_ bed. Ye know what I mean. We've committed enough sinful acts under this roof already, let's do this properly"

"Thought we were just getting warmed up?" Ste chuckles against the damp of Brendan's skin. "Properly huh? You'll have to take me on a 'proper' date then"

"Because taking ye to the Isle of White is not good enough?!"

"Sit up" Ste said, he slides out from below Brendan and waits until he's sat pillows propped up against the headboard. Ste moves to sit between his legs and pulls his arms around his waist. Ste drifts his fingertips against Brendan's wrists and arms and lets his eyes close, head laying back on him.

"What do ye expect from this date?" Brendan asks and breaks the relaxed silence.

"You in a suit for starters. You can pick me up at the house too"

"Pick ye up at the house?! Ye live next door, walk around ye lazy sh..."

"Shut up, this is my date."

"Just ye going is it?"

"Fine, _our_ date. You in a suit me in..."

"Your birthday suit" Brendan interrupts, "Saves me faffing about ripping off your clothes afterwards"

"Brendan! Be serious. I want flowers..." Ste honks out in laughter.

"Now you're pushing it boy. The suit I can do. Red shirt"

"Definitely the red one. I'd forget the date then, just drag ya to me room instead"

"You're on, easiest date I've ever planned, skip the restaurant bill and straight in for the fu..."

"Funny ain't ya? Least you think you are" Ste wriggles further against Brendan, hears him inhale the smell of his hair. Ste nibbles at his bottom lip "When do we have to go home?"

Ste waits for the answer, but Brendan's silence indicates it's a lot sooner than either of them want. Going back means continuing within their little bubble again and keeping up a pretense that would now be a lot harder to accomplish. Ste laces his fingers through Brendan's and takes a firm hold, bows his legs placing Brendan's hands on his cock. Ste sighs and arches his neck while Brendan's fingers guide over his length.

"We've a little time yet" Brendan said dragging Ste's leg back. He feels down under the covers and the inside of Ste's silky thigh grabbing the soft of his arsecheek. Ste's hole twitches when circling the muscle, Brendan gently teasing in the tip of his finger.

" _Fuck_..." Ste lifts his hips off the bed.

"You're tight Steven, I'll have to work on ye a while" They bump noses as they share an intoxicating kiss, Brendan parting them to feel Ste's breathing judder. "Ye like me doing this?"

"Can't you tell how much?"

"Start as we mean to go on, join me in the shower?" Brendan asks, and gives Ste's cock another squeeze.

"Yeah, still sticky from last night" Ste chuckles, lingers another kiss before getting up out of bed.

"The state of ye"

"Err, all of this _'state'_ is your doing!"

"Yeah" Brendan admits proudly. "Best finish the job" Brendan dives off the bed and chases Ste into the bathroom.

* * *

Ste makes them both a coffee. Warm in their thick clothes, they sit outside the log cabin at the seating area and look out onto the sea views the snow brushed Isle of White has to offer. There's no one out as they sit there, the brisk morning perhaps keeping people indoors. Ste likes it though, the fresh cool air, he breathes it in and blows out a cloud of steam from his mouth. It sounds like a loud heavy sigh he realises but Brendan hasn't heard or has chosen to ignore it. Ste watches Brendan lost in his thoughts and quiet as he drinks his coffee.

"I know what you're thinking" Brendan speaks suddenly, gulps down the warm drink that steams in the chilly atmosphere. "About an hour before we set off" Brendan turns to look at Ste. His eyes flicker down to the table then, he doesn't want to leave and it shows on his forlorn expression.

"Best not waste any more time" Ste said painfully.

Brendan holds his chin up again, captures Ste's gaze. "Hey, stop this. Had a good time haven't we?"

"My best weekend ever" Ste nods, smiles with Brendan. "Thank you"

"Anytime. Ye gonna get in that kitchen now, make our breakfast?" Brendan chuckles, tickles Ste's ribs until he's squirming and laughing too.

"You're a cheeky git. What do I get for making your breakfast"

"A round of applause?"

"Give us a snog and I might think about it" Ste said, tightening his fingers around Brendan's top and pulling him closer.

* * *

The journey back for them had been a mixed bag of emotions, even though they'd had a sadness leaving The Isle Of White, their new found commitment had brought them closer together. They stood a long time on Ste's doorstep, holding each other and delaying that best weekend longer. Ste's friends had opened the door and made the decision for them in the end and for Brendan walking away, even to next door, had been difficult.

It's now the last day of the college term and a couple of days before Christmas. There had been more work these last days than Brendan had anticipated and this made the time seem endless. Brendan removes his glasses and pinches the bridge of his nose, eyes closing tightly trying to dissipate the fuzzy headache he's suffering from. The day had literally crawled, hours dragging like dead weight and Brendan just wanted his bed. A nice comfortable pillow and soft mattress to lie upon. He might not sleep but the thought of it still felt inviting.

The last of the students had left now and the pile of paperwork that festered on his desk was pushed out of the way and into the corner making enough room for his folded arms and his head to lay upon. Brendan blinked suddenly and felt hands pinch his shoulders in a way that had him groaning in comfort. Eyes returning to their heavy state. The older man lay his head back down again.

"Jeez, you're full of knots"

"Unsurprising, I work tirelessly every day."

"Aw, poor teacher all hard done by. I'll bring ya an apple, that'll cheer ya up."

Brendan scoffed and then hummed in gratitude, Ste had magic fingers. He could feel himself edging to sleep and they had a study lesson to do. "I'd best move." Brendan said, his voice gruff and lackluster.

"Doesn't matter, you're tired. Why don't ya go home, you might sleep. I reckon you almost drifted off then." Ste said, he slid his hands underneath Brendan's shirt jacket allowing it to fall down his arms. Brendan realising where they were opened his eyes to see the bolt placed firmly across the classroom door, it was then he allowed his eyes to droop once more, head heavy against his arms.

"Didn't want ya complaining, so I locked it" Ste grumbled as he spoke, slight defiance lacing his tone. Brendan scoffed into his arms.

"Don't care if they see us. First time I've seen ye all day, not like we're in the canteen"

"Really?" Ste relaxed his hands. "I didn't mean to be flippant, sorry"

"You're right though, I have been like that. Not anymore."

Ste cupped his hands over Brendan's shoulders, moulded and flexed his palms fingering up through his dark hair to massage his scalp. Ste dipped his lips down and cupped slow kisses into the back of Brendan's neck. Brendan hummed and placed his hand down behind him, gripped a hold of the back of Ste's thigh gently stroking the curve of his palm there.

"That feels so good"

"It's the last day of college and Christmas in a matter of days so forget our studying for once. Have the night off" Ste spoke his words into Brendan's ear, nuzzled closer. "You need to relax"

"Your hands are relaxing me"

"My hands are best on you." Ste rode his palms down Brendan's shirt covered chest then back up, finger tips scoring deep into his skin and over his nipples. Another groan from Brendan had Ste smirking to himself. Brendan opened his eyes but remained head laid down, listened to Ste move around to one of the desks in front of him. Brendan turned and flicked his eyes up at Ste sat there.

"Don't hold out on me now Steven. What's up?"

"It's been days since we got back, all we've done is come here or study. I can't stop thinking about us, after that weekend away. You know, like...us, _together._ How it would be, the way you'd feel." Ste quietens and looks down at his shoes, fiddles with his fingers nervously.

"Weren't ye just sayin' I needed my rest?"

Ste curls his lips inwards stifling smirk. "Yeah, but this would relax ya, afterwards."

"Would it now? Ye don't think I have thought about it?" Brendan asks, lifts himself up off the desk. "I could go crazy the amount of time I think about ye. Thought we agreed to taking it slow?"

"There's taking it slow and there's becoming a nun Brendan"

 _"A nun?!_ You'd better not boy" Brendan warns with a pointed finger and watches Ste tut in frustration. It's mean to wind him up, but he can't help it.

"I'll have to beg at this rate"

"Hold that thought yeah?" Brendan said watching Ste blush instantly, the reaction lighting an immediate warmth in him. Brendan simmers down. "What ye want, a quick fumble in my car? Back seat?"

"Is that all I am to you? A joke?"

"No, of course not. I'm an idiot sometimes."

"A good description. Took words right outta my mouth" They both chuckled then, Ste shaking his head.

"Ya don't feel like this over 'a quick fumble' Bren. Although the back seat of your car is the best idea you've come up with so far"

"I've just had it valeted" Brendan doesn't dare look up at Ste, eyes firmly on his hands as he relishes the smirk upon his face. He just about hears the huffed breath Ste gives him.

"You just can never be serious can you?"

Brendan keeps an intense glare with Ste pushing up out of his seat. He rounds his desk to stand in front of Ste and towers over his smaller frame. "I can be serious. Don't go home tonight, what do ye think?"

Ste grinned from ear to ear. Gripped Brendan's tie in his hand and pulled him down closer. "I could stay for Christmas, would you like that?"

"Sounds like a plan. Let's get out of here"

* * *

"What do ye want for tea tonight? Take out?" Brendan asks, tosses his keys on the side and removes his jacket placing it on one of the chairs. Brendan turns around when he doesn't get an answer. Ste shakes his head slowly and gains on the older man. Grips his hand in his and pulls him backwards.

"You know what I want. And you can keep your tie on" Ste winks walking to the stairs. "I'm gonna go shower, freshen up. I suggest you're on your bed waiting when I come out of it."

"Jesus, must be my lucky night. Get that fit backside up them stairs boy" Brendan laughs as Ste does exactly what he's told, leaving Brendan to follow him. He's interrupted on the bottom step by his phone. He reaches for it ready to mute the thing until he sees it's Cheryl. Gazing quickly up the stairs he answers the call.

"Chez? Yeah, this is really bad timing, can ye call me tomorrow?"

"Brendan love. Ye keep saying this to me. How are ye always so busy? I need to speak to ye about Da..." Cheryl almost sobs her words leaving Brendan to stumble his breathing. "It's nearly Christmas, can't ye both just please try and make up? Then ye can come and spend it with me."

"I can't. I, I'm spending Christmas with Steven. It's arranged now." Brendan closes his eyes at the sudden silence from his sister. "Chez..."

"Wow, just wow he's gotta be damn special for ye to do that. How many years have I asked ye to come here? The answer is always the same, but now a pretty lad asks ye and you're all for it" Cheryl spoke spitefully holding back a sob. Brendan felt guilty.

"Will it just be ye Chez?"

"Da will be with me as he always is, just not in Ireland this time. The doctors said he can be helped, by a donor so he's getting treatment in England. Ye don't have an excuse anymore Bren, he's almost on your doorstep now."

Brendan stilled and felt a cold shiver caress his body in goosebumps. "What do ye mean, in England? No, he can't be here. Chez, is that the business ye meant? No wonder ye kept it to yourself!"

"At least I'm doing something! I love him, but ye still say these things to hurt me, I know ye do"

"No, I don't... That's not true."

"I have been for the tests, once the results come back I'm gonna have the operation. That's why I called, I won't give up on him. He needs us"

"Operation, what are ye talking about?"

"I'm giving Daddy some of my liver. It'll help his recovery and..."

"NO, I won't let ye do this. Make yourself ill for him?!" Brendan shouts and cuts his sister off, starts to pace the room nervously. His breathing escalates and becomes loud and juddering trying to process what's happening. "Why can't ye see what he's doing Chez? Manipulating your mind into doing this for him!"

"Forget it Brendan. My names not Ste is it. Have a good Christmas, I love ye"

"Wait, Jesus... That's not fair. Ye don't know him, Steven is..." Brendan raises his eyes to the ceiling and tries to swallow down the painful lump in his throat. "Send me your address, just don't do anything until I get there, promise me"

"I'm staying at a rented apartment in London. There's spare rooms here. Are ye bringing Ste then, the one ye can't seem to live without" Cheryl continues her sarcastic tirade leaving Brendan to stand firm to the spot. He doesn't get the chance to reply before Cheryl gushes down the receiver again. "Daddy will be over the moon to see ye, cannot wait to see his face! Love ye Bren"

Brendan ends the call quickly and sighs heavy, his body shakes with the deafening beat of his heart. Brendan can feel his palms that are clammy and hot fisting by his side. Ste's hand edges over his shoulder surprising him to jump and turn around.

"Hey..." Ste speaks calmly and briefly holds Brendan's face in his hands.

"I'm okay. I just wasn't expecting ye, I'm alright" Brendan swallows thickly "Thought ye were upstairs having a shower"

"I was gonna, then I heard your raised voice. I came downstairs because I was concerned. You don't look alright, you're pale. Paler than normal anyway" Ste scoffs lightly bringing a slither of a smile to Brendan's face again.

"My father is getting treatment in the UK. _He's here"_ Brendan whispers and his voice contorts like he's struggling.

"Just me and you here" Ste kisses Brendan and strokes down his face. "You're going to visit him aren't you? Is Cheryl making you do this Brendan?"

"No. I mean, not callously. Chez had a completely different upbringing to me, how can I expect her to understand the way I act. Hate the way he makes me feel after all these years. Will ye come with me? I don't think I can do this without ye"

"Of course I will. And forget separate hotel rooms, we go together, we're gonna stay together"

"We'll be stopping in a rented apartment, both of us"

Ste nods and stretches his arms around Brendan's neck drawing him in. Brendan closes him inside his arms and squeezes enough to lift Ste up off the floor and he lets out a laugh that's like music to Brendan's ears. Feeling infinitely better as the time passes, the older man sighs into the soft skin of Ste's neck, cups little mouthfuls of flesh and kisses there until Ste smiles and hums, pushing off the flat of his feet to curl his arms tighter. Brendan knows Ste won't let go until he's ready to, until the bad thoughts have dissipated into something calmer, something worth thinking about. Someone he loves.

Brendan moves them apart and stares into Ste's eyes before taking his hand and walking them in silence up the stairs. They kiss roughly against the bathroom door Brendan pressing his full body hard against Ste who claws at the wooden frame and gasps when they part. His eyes are masked by a dark sweep of eyelashes that flutter, tongue licking his lips invitingly wet. Brendan stays trapped in their gaze reaching for the door handle to open it, waits for Ste to walk in. They collide to kiss again, sensually and deep until Ste has to part them to back into the bathroom completely.

"We can wait if..." Ste is silenced by Brendan's fingers, they caress the side of his face while he looks at him.

Brendan places his mouth to the back of Ste's ear, hand travelling the curve of his arse. "I want to fuck ye like you're my first. Like I am yours. And I need to tell ye, you're the only man I have ever loved. I love ye Steven"

 _"Bren..."_ Ste whispers, feels the brush of Brendan's beard and moustache hair on his cheek. Ste wraps his arms tightly around Brendan's neck and holds onto him for dear life. They stay that way for many moments and when Brendan tries to part them, Ste shakes his head and squeezes his arms closer.

"Go on" Brendan murmurs encouragingly and Ste slides his arms looser, gazing into Brendan's eyes.

 _"I love you too"_

 _"Go on, I'll be waiting"  
_

* * *

Brendan undresses but leaves his tie on, finds some unopened lube and condoms before presenting himself on the bed naked with the tie slightly falling to the left of his body, one leg up and arms bent behind his head on the pillows. He's wearing a delicious smirk when Ste walks in. He brings with him a slight steam that swirls off his body with the heat and cool of the room and at first Ste is shy, sliding his arms around his slender waist. They both appreciate the view and the way Brendan looks at him leaves Ste feeling confident again, Ste pulls his towel loose, slowly reveals more and more skin before letting it fall to the floor leaving Brendan holding a breath.

"Look at ye, so goddamn perfect. Get in my bed"

Ste honks out his laughter, his flaccid dick bouncing as he rushes and leaps on the mattress, swiftly cocks his leg over brazen as you like to sit down in Brendan's lap. The touch of their lengths bringing on a little gasp from Ste. He rocks his hips and leans down over Brendan, filters his tie through his fingers, pulls it loose and drags it from around his neck.

"You are gorgeous. We have all night, yeah?"

"Minx. Everything we do is your choice, whatever ye want. I'll take it slow as ye want"

"I know you will." Ste kneels up to grab the lube from the bedside table and passes it to Brendan, kissing him as he does. Ste falls to one side and strokes his hairy leg high to drape over Brendan's chest. "Have you thought about this as much as me?"

Brendan slides further down the bed. "Surprised you've never heard me imagining this. I'm only next door..."

"Well my room's downstairs init. Toneh's next to you. Told im the moaning were the spirits" Ste catches Brendan's widened eyes. "Ya know...ghosts wailing in the night"

"Piss off!" Brendan exasperates and tickles Ste into submission. "Tell me you're joking"

"Yeah but...your face is a picture! Ha ha" Ste pulls Brendan down closer to him. "Next time call me yeah, we can imagine together"

Brendan's eyes darken their blue riding his palm flat between Ste's parting. He's warm and damp from the shower, they both smile at the easy slip it creates on contact.

"Ye wanna go slow?" Brendan asks and Ste nods, his eyes shine the nerves he feels so Brendan keeps Ste's mind distracted, takes his hand further until he's reached Ste's tightly pinched hole. His finger draws a circle on the shape of it, pulls Ste's leg higher and the tip pushes a little against it, a little pressure while he keeps Ste's eyes fixed.

"There's been others, before me?" Ste feels stupid to ask because obviously there has to of been, he doesn't like the feeling of that and can see Brendan doesn't either.

"There was nobody before ye that mattered. Ye matter Steven, and as far as I'm concerned there is no one else" Brendan's eyes darted with Ste's, he felt something new in his heart, a feeling he'd never experienced before except with Ste. It spread throughout his body and compelled him to kiss Ste again finding he'd never tire of it with him, the taste of Ste alone awoke his every nerve ending. Brendan squirted lube over the flat of his fingers and rubbed along his entrance, the cool of it leaving a gasp from Ste and then a smile as he rolls his hips and shivers once the goosebumps fan across his skin. They stay close enough to mix the hot breath of their lungs, the sounds of it changing the more Brendan works his hand between Ste's thighs.

Ste's breath falters when Brendan's forefinger gains past the resistance, muscles grabbing hold the more Brendan eases in. Ste gasps at the intrusion, lifts his leg higher and rocks his hip bone. Brendan licks the tip of his tongue along Ste's parted lips, dives inside the damp of his mouth inserting his middle finger alongside the other. Ste hitches a breath and widens his mouth for the deep kiss Brendan gives him. Their tongues like an electric current each time they tangle together. Ste visibly relaxes and Brendan brushes his fingers against his prostrate breaking off the kiss. Ste's breathing splinters fixing his eyes on Brendan.

 _"Oh my god..."_

"Sensitive, aren't we?" Brendan grinned against Ste's soft lips curling his fingers further inside him.

 _"Brendan..."_

Brendan pulls out his fingers and holds Ste's cock, rubs between the slit and milks Ste's orgasm from him, fondles his ball sack with the wet and squeezes. Ste cries out loudly, not caring who hears them. Unfortunately for Ste the neighbours are his friends. The blush in his cheeks intensifies as he giggles out his comedown with strangled moans.

"What?" Brendan laughs with him, nuzzles below his neck.

"My friends live next door. They'll think you're strangling me" Ste beams through his laughter.

"They ain't heard nothing yet. Wait till I'm fucking ye against the wall."

"Nooo, that's dead embarrassin'. How will I face them now"

"Just gloat, they'll be envious after I have ye screamin' the house down"

Ste stretches up to kiss Brendan and twists around his body to get him to lie back. He moves to lay over Brendan, slicking his come sticky between their bodies. Ste glances up to Brendan as he tears open a condom wrapper and the noise has Brendan's head tipping forwards, he watches Ste glove him.

"What position are you gonna have me in?"

"Every position possible" Brendan smiles wide, rounds his head and watches Ste's sinful eyes follow his movement.

"On your knees boy, or do ye want to _gaze into my eyes..._ " Brendan changes his tone of voice, tries to sound soppy. Ste pins down Brendan's wrists against the pillow behind him and growls leaving his now growing dick to gently encourage Brendan's arousal.

"Can we do both? Then you can gaze into _my eyes_ and watch me come on your cock"

Brendan pushes up and shoves Ste off him, Ste settling on all fours. Brendan pushes his hands up then down his body, kisses the small of his back a few times to soothe him. Ste breathes deep through his nose and holds his head low below his shoulders, closes his eyes at Brendan's gentle touch.

Brendan's warm hands curve the shape of Ste's bum, slides his moist fingers over his ball sack "Are ye all right?"

"Uh huh, yes." Ste mumbles nervously. Brendan lays over him and tangles their fingers together, Ste grips them hard.

"If ye want to stop, tell me" Brendan connected their lips and watched Ste nod in agreement.

Brendan rubbed the head of his cock against Ste's hole and pushes through the stretched muscle, sinking slowly into him. Ste gasps sporadically, scrunches the sheets below him and pulls at them. Brendan uses one hand to hold his hip the other to stroke Ste's spine, his breath catching in the deep of his throat as each inch of him enters Ste. Brendan lays his body flat with Ste's back and whispers encouragement.

"Ye feel so good. _So tight"_ Brendan grunts and slaps Ste's bum.

They bound together fully with a seamlessless that steals the breath from Ste's lungs. Brendan doesn't move until Ste is ready and reaches for his cock, uses loose circled fingers to drag the sensitivity from it drifting them through the pre come. Ste is still damp with the shower water and sweat from their heat, Brendan uses that to slide against his ball sack and further until his fingers can feel where they are connected. Ste inhales a breath with a shudder feeling alive at Brendan's touch. Ste moves his hips and encourages Brendan to do the same, the side in and out is sleek and adds more wet noise to their fucking. Brendan withdraws slowly and drives inside his tight heat, long deeper thrusts that keeps Ste moaning breathlessly.

Brendan grips Ste's thighs and holds close, hips rutting deep seated fucks high enough to touch Ste's prostate. Ste claws down hard on the sheet pulling it off the bed while Brendan curls his arms up and around Ste's shoulders hooking himself there and moves with Ste like there's nothing more than this.

"Hey" Brendan whispers into Ste's ear, enters him again and again. "Wanna switch now?"

 _"Hmm, yeah_ " Ste moves to lay on his back and lays his legs wide. He's glad of the intimacy, face to face so he can see Brendan, kiss him. Ste reached down to hold him, center Brendan's cock at the entrance to his body. Chest to chest and locked in a heated kiss, Brendan slips back into Ste's hole seating down against his sweet spot. The thrill prickles along his each nerve ending eliciting unearthly moans from Ste flicking his pelvis to keep the pleasure from waning, his legs cross around Brendan's back pulling him down heavier.

 _"Brendan, ohgod...harder"_

Brendan grips Ste's arse cheeks and parts them wider lifting Ste and sets a hard fast pace inside him. Ste cries out, loud cursing matching every stroke Brendan makes with him. Ste grips his dick and jerks himself off quickly climaxing heavy between their bodies, come streaking against their stomachs. Ste rounds his abdomen, ruts and clenches Brendan's dick inside his walls sending pleasure through the both of them.

"Fucking hell, Steven" Brendan bellows, stops flush inside Ste to climax himself. He holds Ste's arms high, lacing their fingers together and slows easy through the comedown, they kiss deeply, breathing hot and heavy. Ste relishes the throbbing heat between his thighs, flushed and spaced out Ste lays his head back into the pillow and strokes Brendan's neck when he collapses on him, can't hear anything but the pulse of their hearts beating.

"God" Ste exhales sharply "That were amazing."

Ste's laugh is low and carried on breath, clenching his pelvic muscles to trap Brendan's cock and basks in the sound he makes. Ste could quite honestly stay like this, brain overclouded with the sensory aspects around him, the once smooth dry sheets had now crumpled wet beneath him, the smell of sex in the room, Brendan drawing the tip of his nose down behind his ear to rest in the curve of his neck, the hum made with the soft kisses he lays there. Ste closes his eyes.

"You'll have to let me go at some point" Brendan interjects Ste's thought pattern, talks against his silky skin still dewy with a sheen of sweat.

"Hmm, I know." Ste said regretfully, letting his legs part down on the bed. His fingers guide along Brendan's neck continuing to tickle strokes there.

Brendan pulls out of Ste, discards the condom in the bin and passes Ste some tissues before moving to leave the bedroom. Ste sits up suddenly once he returns, two cold drinks in his hands. Brendan sees the relief on Ste's face.

"Don't get rid of me that easily Steven" Brendan passes Ste a glass and takes a big gulp of his own before placing it on the side.

"Am I dreamin?" Ste murmured, locking their gaze. Brendan moves down on him, kisses his lips.

"I think I am. Thought I told ye to get in my bed"

Ste grins and gets under the duvet, Brendan switches off the light plunging the room into darkness. Ste lays on his chest when he gets into bed and the only noise is the sounds of their breathing.

"Bren?"

"Yeah?"

"If you can't sleep, wake me up" Ste yawns lightly bouncing himself to his side and pressed against Brendan's chest.

"Hm, okay" Brendan sighs low through his nose, curls his arm around Ste.

 _"Brendan?"_

"Uh huh..." Brendan flickers his eyes open then shut again, can't believe how tired he feels. Ste doesn't say anything more so he tugs at his side. "What's up?"

 _"I love you"_ Ste whispers, and holds his breath. He feels Brendan kiss his shoulder.

 _"I love ye too"_

"Steven?"

"What? _"_

"Go to bloody sleep" Brendan grins as Ste laughs into the darkness.


	8. Chapter 8

Thank you for all the continued support for this fic, I have loved reading your kind thoughts. This is the last part to this story and contains some angst. xx

* * *

The Boy Next Door

Part 8

Christmas Eve

They'd traveled late evening to London, following the directions Cheryl had given them to an apartment that was near to the hospital Seamus was being treated at. The drive down had been long and Ste had felt his eyes heavy a few times, the motion of the car lulling him in a relaxed state. Brendan had kept his mind occupied however, the older man quiet and subdued he hadn't said much to Ste on the long journey there. Ste had still made his presence known by touching his leg or pointing out things as they'd driven past them. Anything to put Brendan at ease. The roads were almost abandoned as Ste stared out of the car and admired the bright colourful Christmas trees that adorned windows of the houses they drove by. It hadn't felt like Christmas to Ste, but that could've been he'd never spent it anywhere other than with his friends, at least for the last few year. They'd stayed in and opened presents after midnight and drank until merry and stupid.

This time he was with Brendan and the difference was felt within his heart instead, he loved Brendan with every part of him and couldn't imagine anything past that.

"You're doing that thing again" Brendan smirks, quickly turning to look at Ste then back at the road, he steers the car towards the pavement to park up finally.

"What's that then?" Ste asks amused, they both had that same smile although Ste wasn't sure they'd ever stopped smiling.

"Looking at me that way" Brendan jolts the car to a standstill as they arrive at Cheryl's place. Brendan turns to look at Ste properly now, the light from the street lamps leaving a glow over them and the snow that drifts down on to the windscreen.

"Like how you're looking at me ya mean?" Ste raises his eyebrows unclipping his seat belt and shifting his body around.

Brendan breathes through his nose, a slight laughter to the sound of it. Brendan unbuckles his own seat belt moving over to stroke his hand up Ste's thigh, crowds in closer to Ste.

"You've been very quiet, are ya okay?" Ste keeps his voice low and Brendan's eyes fixed.

"I'm alright, I guess. Mind's whirring a little with over thinking and I'm feeling tense being here ye know"

"Bound to be feeling like that, but it's just your sister in there. An I bet she'll be happy to see you at Christmas too. It's a special time for some people ain't it, they wanna spend it with family." Ste holds tightly onto Brendan's hand. "Can I help ya feel better?"

"Yes ye can" Brendan whispers into his ear and nibbles at the fleshy lobe, his lips drag along Ste's jaw and to his parted lips. Ste beams into the kiss Brendan teases him with.

Ste's phone vibrates in his pocket parting them unexpectedly. He fishes it out and opens the message he's received and turns it so they both can see. Ste chuckles at the picture Amy has sent him. A selfie of his friends together at the house and obviously considerably drunk with their party hats on.

 _'Not the same without u. Hope u r both behaving ;) x'_ _A_

Brendan tugs at the band of Ste's trousers, hooks his fingers. "I prefer to misbehave"

 _'No, can't keep our hands off. :) x' S_

 _'Aw ;P Happy for u xx' A_

 _'Ta. Save me some xmas dins :) xx' S_

"They look like they're having fun. I know the girls though, they gonna be asleep on the sofa and poor Tone will have to talk to the cat"

"Hang on, ye don't have a cat..."

"Yeah I know, but Tone can't handle his drink. I once caught im talking to the kettle, he thought it were a cat. " Ste turns to capture Brendan's gaze and pockets his phone. "Long standing joke"

"Sounds like you've had some fun times" Brendan's eyes glisten with his smile. "Ye wanna go home to your friends? Spend another Christmas with them instead of being here with me, I'll understand Steven"

"No, I wanna be here." Ste said and brings up his hand to cradle Brendan's face. "I miss ya when we're apart, don't like it. My place is with you"

"It's the same for me too, both of us bonkers" Brendan's smile is fleeting kissing Ste's mouth. "This your first time in London isn't it?"

"Yep, it's a shame we won't see much of it."

"Listen, ye go ahead, I just gotta make a quick call. I'll be with ye in a minute"

* * *

"Phone call sorted?" Ste asked curiously, he looked right at Brendan who just walked to the boot of his car and pulled out their bags. He placed Ste's in his arms and closed the boot again.

"Well?"

"Well what?" Brendan stepped backwards, face unreadable. Ste held his eyelids at half mast and left Brendan chuckling to himself. "You'll see, come on."

Brendan knocked on the door confidently and once Cheryl had let them in she quickly hugged her brother tightly. Ste met her glassed eyes and smiled fleetingly walking their bags into the lounge that had a warm golden brown decor and silver sparkle Christmas tree in the corner of the room. Ste noted the odd number of presents laid beneath it and chewed silently at his bottom lip. Cheryl held her silent brother and then turned to look at Ste.

"Thanks for coming. Ste, it's nice to finally meet ye, our Bren speaks highly of ye and I can see why."

"Thanks" Ste flicked his eyes up to Brendan with a shyness he couldn't hold back. "Hard to be away from your brother these days"

"Aw, that's lovely. Must be nice getting to see our Bren so much. A rarity for me" Cheryl avoided her brother's gaze and smiled broadly at Ste. "Are ye hungry, I could make ye both something?"

"Well..." Ste started to speak but his words were interjected.

"No it's fine Chez. Steven and I already have plans this evening." Brendan spoke flatly, edged around his sister to walk over to Ste and grab his bag from him.

"We do?" Ste spoke curiously, let his mouth fall slightly agape. This was news to him.

"Yeah, thought we could go out. Need the fresh air, stifling being in that car for so long, stretch our legs."

"Stretch our legs? It's like the north pole out there Bren, don't wanna be freezin' me bits off"

"I'll keep ye warm" Brendan swiftly grabbed Ste by the waist and pulled him into a loud smacking kiss that left the biggest grin on his face. Ste felt delirious and half embarrassed in front of Cheryl. But that had been the point, Brendan wanted to make a show of them, a statement. "Gonna get changed, come on Steven"

Ste looked back at Cheryl awkwardly and hesitated. "It's okay love, ye both have a nice time. I was gonna get an early night so I'll see ye both in the morning yeah?" Cheryl nods, kisses her brother on the cheek before she finds her bedroom downstairs. As soon as the door clicks shut Ste shoots a disapproving look at Brendan.

"That were cold Brendan"

"It's cold outside too, so ye best wrap up. Me and ye are going to a restaurant. About time I took ye on a date finally and with all that snow outside, reckon the setting is fate" Brendan looks towards the window then back at Ste and the stairs ahead of him. He starts to climb them and Ste follows behind. They share the biggest room upstairs. Ste walks into the en suite bathroom to get ready and when he's finished he finds Brendan stood by the window looking out, hands slipped heavy into his tight fit suit trousers.

"I still think ya were mean to her, ya saw the look on her face right? She's over the moon to see you. All this...it's not Cheryl's fault Bren"

"Yes, I realise that. However I am feeling anxious being here, knowing he's...so close by. I gotta focus on something else. Something that means my heart beats this way for a good reason."

"I get that, really I do, but not at the expense of your sister. Just, please make up with her tomorrow. It's important."

"Anything else ye wanna get off your chest? Only I planned to take ye out tonight"

"I love your surprise, ya know I do"

"Wait till ye see the restaurant" Brendan replies and turns around to shows off his full attire, red shirt cloaked by his sharp grey jacket. Ste's instant smile allows Brendan relief.

"You wear that for me?" Ste asks, closes the gap between them. Brendan nods silently and grips Ste in their shared hold of each other. Ste's hand wanders over the curve of Brendan's arse and squeezes the pert flesh. "You look fit as"

"Ye give the best compliments. Not so bad yourself. It's snowing outside and as we're walking to the place I found us put your jacket on. I won't disclose how obscene the charge for Christmas Eve was, but if ye want to pay me back in kind, I won't argue"

"Thank you, that's a really amazing gesture. It's why you stayed in the car init?"

"Yep, I've never grovelled before but for ye...anyway it's cold so you'll have to hold close to me out there"

Ste pushes up to kiss Brendan, their noses bumping and teeth nibbling, the kiss they share keeps them huddled together. "Sounds perfect."

* * *

The restaurant is busy with the people who braved the weather. Ste and Brendan are placed by the window in a private corner together. Candle on the table, sparkle clean glasses and a set of menu's for them to choose through. The menu is lavish with all kinds of meals and starters. Ste skips that and orders the fish while Brendan asks for a steak. Captured smiles throughout the meal leave Brendan feeling better as the scene outside becomes a winter wonderland.

"Never been on a date like this before, it's dead posh in here" Ste coos happily, drinks some wine from the over sized wine glass. He grins around it and gazes into Brendan's eyes.

"Have ye been on many then?"

"A couple, yeah. My last relationship, didn't work out. So I kinda gave up on romance for a while. He left college last year and I haven't seen him since. When my friends suggested we all moved into a shared house, I tagged along. What about you Bren? You'll have had them all lined up for ya I bet" Ste pouts then, placing the glass down and stabbing the fish with his fork.

"The fish Steven, it's already dead" Brendan smirked. "I've never had dates or relationships. I've had bunk ups" Brendan chuckles as Ste raises his eyebrows. "Then one day I meet this boy that likes to talk and for the first time, I like to listen"

"Must of been drunk"

"Yep" Brendan nods in agreement. He watches Ste grin shaking his head.

"Honestly, first time. Did ya fancy me?"

"I thought ye looked like... an angel. I thought I'd drank far too much, or the air was too thin. But I'd just breathed ye in without realising it"

"Sends ya funny that wine" Ste grins against his wine glass. "I was curious about ya, you seemed dead mysterious. When we sat at the bus stop, I was looking at ya afterwards, I couldn't stop looking."

"I know ye was, and I still can't"

They eat silently for a while, Ste watching the snow outside of the window. Then to Brendan who seems to be playing with his food more than eating it.

"It's really nice this...Bren?"

"The calm before the storm" Brendan says with a lost thought. Ste's hand is warm over his, it squeezes reassurance and has Brendan flicking his eyes up again.

"He ain't gonna ruin this, no chance right. And he ain't gonna hurt you because I'd fight for you without a moment's thinking" Ste folds his fingers into Brendan's hand fully.

"Hey, I'm sorry. Just ignore me. I'm glad you're here" Brendan darts his eyes with Ste's, nods assuredly. "Do ye want pudding, or is that reserved for when I get ye in bed again"

"Yeah, who cares for posh pud when ya can get afters at home init?" Ste says with a wink, they finish off their drinks and Brendan pays the bill. The walk back is a cold one but the snowfall is scenic caressing the trees and ground beneath them. Brendan slips underfoot with his shoes on and Ste grabs at his arm giggling in laughter.

"Ya better not take me with ya Bren. You slip an I am letting go of ya!"

"Ah how I love your wicked side"

"I'd laugh my ass off if ya slipped, funny as." Ste said wandering further away. He grips some snow from a wall in his hand and holds it up with a impish grin.

"No...Steven, ye throw that and you'll be in trouble" Brendan warns with a pointed finger but still can't help the slither of a smile.

"Yeah...how much trouble?" Ste grins and lobs the snowball at Brendan's long leather jacket with a loud spat. Ste shakes his head as Brendan grabs some of his own snow and when Ste rushes to get away, falls foul of the icy weather. In a turn of luck, Ste ends up in Brendan's arms and held back against a tree to steady them. Ste laughs as Brendan drops the snowball on his head and ruffles it into his hair. He should be freezing but all he can feel is the comfort Ste's donkey laughter brings him.

"Oh, I can't... believe ya did that!" Ste hitches a breath feeling Brendan's body press close hands dragging down the sides of his body to pin him down.

"Ye once told me I could have ye against a tree, remember that? Reckon we could warm ourselves for a bit?"

"Definitely" Ste grips a hold of Brendan's coat and jolts him to his lips. They're both frost bitten and cool to the touch, but their tongues are hot and wet slipping together. The heat between them soars and allows them warmth in the thickening snowfall around their feet.

* * *

"Leave the curtains open" Ste asks, watches Brendan halt his move to pull them closed. Turns back to look at Ste stood in the middle of the room smiling. The snow casts a shadow over the room thanks to the moonlight, the flakes are falling down thick now and has slowed their movement to the ground. "It looks cool doesn't it?"

"Yeah it does" Brendan gazes at Ste then, rounds his arms behind himself to take off his jacket.

Ste backs up to the wall and pops open his jeans button, runs his zipper open. "Leave the suit on"

"Ye are very demanding tonight. Take off your clothes" Brendan said pulling open his shirt and loosening his belt buckle.

"Don't forget..." Ste strips off his jeans and boxers. Left in his top, Ste nibbles his bottom lip as Brendan fetches some lube and a condom from their bag.

"Against the wall?"

"Yeah, reminds me of the tree from earlier. But it's way to freezin' to do it outside for real"

"Shame that" Brendan parts his lips noisily, places them over Ste's neck and suckles the skin. The heat between them is in contrast to the below zero temperatures outside but there is still a small trace of the elements over Ste's body that Brendan needs to warm and he does so willingly. "Maybe one day though"

"Definitely maybe" Ste helps Brendan open his fly and gets his hand down inside, molds the lump in his boxers. "You gonna fuck me?"

"Yes I am" Brendan pushes flush with Ste, keeps him hard pressed against the wall and kisses him deeply. Ste is up on his tip toes, Brendan's red collar held in white knuckles keeping him firmly in place while their tongues become playful. Brendan releases his dick from his boxers and let's Ste stroke it, pull him harder. Eyes blurring and head off in the clouds above them, Brendan struggles to control his breathing and that of his arousal.

"Always get ya wet" Ste grins lacing his thumb between the slit of Brendan's cock, uses that to slide down the underside of it.

"Speaking of which" Brendan falls to his knees and takes his hands down Ste's hair mapped leg, lifts it up and hangs it over his shoulder smoothing the inside of his thigh. Brendan nuzzles his nose against Ste's ball sack and kisses them wetting a line down the middle leaving Ste to whisper his name and hold his head back on the wall.

Ste gains more height on his tip toes and gasps feeling Brendan's tongue lap against his entrance, it makes him buck and slip leaving Brendan laughing vibrations along his tongue.

"God, Bren..." Ste scrunches his eyes closed, flushed heat intensifying burning his body temperature. Brendan's tongue laps and darts freely. Teases the muscle to twitch. Ste holds his hands on the wall for support and edges off the pad of his foot, his other leg angled enough to tilt his hips. Brendan's mouth is open down there, between the wet of his thighs and heat of his hole. Ste rocks gently, helps the tip find a way through and up. Brendan's tongue is moist and needy inside him, curling deeper and it feels so amazing and hot. Ste almost melts with the arousal and pleasure Brendan affords him. Ste can't help fuck himself against the long thick strokes, the way Brendan paints his walls in saliva and hums like it's the best thing he's tasted. Ste covers his face, cheeks burning up with embarrassment. He's moaning every other beat of his heart and his cock is the hardest it's ever stood.

Brendan slowly moves back up to Ste and their eyes match each others in shade. Sliding his lubed up fingers straight up and inside Ste's entrance, Ste moans louder and Brendan has to remind him Cheryl is in the house too. It makes Ste beam biting down on his lip harder tying his legs around the back of Brendan's waist securing them flush.

Brendan delivers hard digs inside Ste's loose hole, stretches him open with slicked up fingers. Ste has to kiss Brendan through the torture of not being able to cry out in arousal, instead leaving his moans deep within Brendan's throat. Ste throws his head back hard as Brendan enters him, still feeling the pain of his thick cock penetrating his tight walls, it soon turns to something else, incredible feeling of fullness and the movement of Brendan inching back and forth between his thighs. There's a thud left on the wall they were fucking against so there was no way they'd be quiet with this.

"Steven, Jesus..." Brendan slowed them down, flicked his hips languid feeding his every inch high into Ste. He withdraws and keeps Ste's eyes locked slowly sinking back in, fucks his tight hole mixing their breaths hot and heavy. Ste licks his lips and softly kisses Brendan.

"Brendan... _"_ Ste swallowed as he climaxed, grinding and bouncing his body with Brendan's thrusts through the comedown. Ste felt boneless, held his head down on Brendan's shoulders and felt the heave of their chests eventually become calmer. His gaze upon the continuing snowfall outside the window that reminded him of a snow globe he always saw at this time of year. Brendan pushed himself closer to Ste and got his attention again. Ste roamed his fingers through his moustashe and beard hair smiling at the intimacy having the man he loved buried inside him.

Brendan breathes into the sweet kisses Ste laid upon his lips. Withdrawing his flaccid cock, Ste's legs quivered like jelly placing them back down on the floor, feet unsteady trying to regain the strength in them.

"Left my mark on ye then." Brendan swiftly takes Ste up into his arms inciting honking laughter from his lips. Placing Ste down on the mattress he kisses his forehead and moves to undress. "My best shirt, look what ye did to it!"

"Yeah, I left my mark too"

"Can I draw the curtains now?" Brendan takes off his shirt chucking it on the floor with the rest of his clothes.

"If ya want. I just like it, the snow looks peaceful to watch"

Brendan jumps into bed and precedes to hold Ste with a shiver. "Peaceful, shame it ain't warm too. Brrr, come here frosty I'll warm ye up again."

"Ta" Ste hums between Brendan's arms and lays down on his chest. He watches the snow again because Brendan left enough space for him to see. He doesn't mention tomorrow and who they'll be seeing because right now it's just them here happy and that's all that matters.

* * *

Ste sat alone at the lounge, hand held at the base of the cup in his hand. It felt strange being in the place without Brendan. He'd woken to find himself alone in bed. The feeling of loss strong not seeing Brendan laid next to him and left Ste confused and hurt. The snow had stopped during the night but had left its presence across London. The sun was in the sky and created a glitter effect bouncing off the thick laid snow on the ground. Ste moved to dress quickly as the chill hit his body hard. Ste had looked through the cupboards and made a coffee reaping the warmth from it.

After a while Cheryl moved through the apartment and searched around until she had found Ste. Her smile was small but friendly and helped relax Ste as she came over to him. "Merry Christmas love, how did ye sleep?

"Merry Christmas, I guess. And on and off, better when I don't sleep alone"

Cheryl raised her eyebrows suspiciously. "Our Brendan know that?"

"Hey, I _meant_ Brendan right. I'd never hurt him Cheryl" Ste spoke defensively.

"Just sisterly concern. And call me Chez, please. I like it and Brendan always calls me that. Speaking of which, is he avoiding me?"

"No, least I don't think so, he wasn't in our room this morning after I woke. I've been waiting for him since. Dunno where he is"

"Bren doesn't like Christmas. Perhaps he needed a walk to clear his head. I wouldn't worry, he made his feelings very clear about ye last night." Cheryl said, moved towards the kitchen to make her own coffee. "Do ye want me to turn up the heating, ye look cold love"

Ste nodded, his expression brightening. He gets up to follow Cheryl through the apartment. "Yeah actually. I am bad for feeling this weather. I wish he'd told me though, can't help but worry about him"

Cheryl turned up the thermostat and sat down next to Ste at the breakfast table. "So ye and our Bren. How did ye meet him?"

"Well, I moved in next door and one day we started chatting. It's weird cos I felt like I'd known him all my life. Reckon it is why we just kept seeing each other. And over time I fell in love with him"

"Oh Ste. It's love? That's brilliant. I am so happy for ye both. Ye obviously are important to Brendan"

"It's not all so plain sailing. I'm his student"

"His student? Isn't that, well, I thought you couldn't..."

"We can't, but that's not stopping us anymore. We're keeping us low key at college an I won't give Brendan up for a technicality."

"Bren bringing ye here is a massive thing for my brother to do. I've never met any of his boyfriends, he's never mentioned names before but ye I've known about for a while. I've met someone too, it's pretty serious. Bren doesn't know but, well we haven't spoken too much recently"

"Tell him Chez, he'll want to know that"

Cheryl held her hand over Ste's, her expression sheepish while looking away. "Bren he...he and Da they don't get along, I'm guessing that's obvious to ye, he's been ill for a long time but more so these last months and I've asked and asked him to come and see him but he kept refusing. Now I tell him I'm thinking of helping our Da and Brendan changes his mind. Has he spoken with ye Ste?"

Ste tried to avoid her eyes his fingers playing with the handle of his cup. Ste swallowed deeply. "I don't believe you'd want me to betray your brothers' confidence. What I will say though is he didn't want to come here. It's taken a lot for him to and ya need to realise that. Last night he didn't mean to be so standoffish. It's not you, Brendan just..."

"I know. He doesn't like Daddy. I understand but why can't they let bygones be bygones. He's dyin' Ste, he needs us more than ever"

"Who needs us?" Brendan's voice broke their gaze. Ste turns and jumps off his chair instantly draping his arms around his neck without a second thought. Brendan holds onto him needing the comfort Ste always brought. Eyes closed, they held each other tightly and sank in to the warmth of each other.

"I was worried. Woke up and you weren't there, didn't like how it made me feel" Ste said sinking into the crook of Brendan's neck and breathing him in. Brendan turns his mouth, cheeks brushing close to allow their lips to touch and kiss softly and intimate. Brendan sighs long through his nose and nuzzles into Ste.

"I'm sorry, I needed some air. Hey ye should see the snow now, bet you'd like it." Brendan kisses Ste again pulls back and lifts up the bag he's holding. "I found an open shop brought our breakfast, pancakes"

"Only you could find those on Christmas day. You eating them with me?"

"I won't be long. Give me and Chez a moment yeah?"

Brendan walks Cheryl through to the lounge and they sit on the long couch together, The tree sparkles and flashes with the bright lights on it, angel placed at the top. Brendan eyes the presents underneath it and feels bad for not even thinking about buying any himself. It had been the last thing on his mind driving down here. Brendan focuses on the tree decorations again until his sister breaks the tension.

"That wee lad has done nothing but talk about ye all morning. Ste said he's in love with ye." Cheryl spoke quietly, sipping at her drink.

Brendan looks back at Cheryl then. "I love him too, very much. And it feels good to admit that, god knows what I'd do without him Chez, he's..."

"Gorgeous" Cheryl smiles warmly "And good for ye, more importantly he's here. Ste told me he's your student too. I never thought you'd continue your teaching Bren. Especially as it was driven by the need to hurt Daddy"

"Jesus. Stop bringing Da into every little thing will ye? I am sick of it, like that man is so important, he doesn't dictate my life anymore. I happen to enjoy teaching, anything to get away from that place, it's poisonous. Everything he touches is poisonous" Brendan seethes his words, throws down the coaster he's been messing with off the coffee table. Cheryl jumps not expecting it. "Steven is the only good thing in my life, he makes the world a better place to live in and better than that, makes me believe it"

"Well thanks for that, so I don't factor anymore eh? Just because I get along with Daddy and ye don't. Ye were always his favourite Brendan, ye know how that feels? He has been asking for ye"

"I don't care! I was his favourite for the wrong reasons Chez! Ye don't know the truth of it, ye can't possibly comprehend. I had to get away, lets just leave it at that, let him die. His time is over"

"I cannot understand why ye can't make up. It was just an argument."

"Is that what he told ye?" Brendan laughs exasperated, he just wants to go home. Get as far away as possible.

"Why don't ye come back to Dublin, help me run the place till Da is on his feet again"

"Chez, why do ye never listen to me ey? It's constant with ye, only hearing what ye want to hear, well no more. I love ye Chez and you're not putting your health on the line for him, I won't allow it ye hear me?!"

Cheryl stood up abruptly, eyes full of hurt and anger "I am not a little girl anymore! I can make my own decisions! I will help him even if you're too cruel not too!" Cheryl fumes and storms out of the room. Brendan instantly regrets the harshness to his tirade but it's impossible for him to feel any other way about it.

After a while Brendan walks to the kitchen and finds Ste with the pancakes for them. His smile thaws Brendan's icy exterior and once the plate is placed in front of him, his appetite too.

"They're cold now, but they taste alright, I can warm them up for ya though. There's some fruit I found too, if ya like"

"This looks good, thank ye" Brendan eats some of the fruit Ste has put on the plate.

"It's no bother. Did you sort things with Chez?" Ste can see the drained complexion of Brendan's skin, he looks down and tired out. Ste bites into a strawberry, eats it quietly to himself.

"Chez won't listen to me Steven, she's left the apartment, gone to the hospital." Brendan looks up at Ste. "I feel bad for always taking it out on her but she's got it into her head this gesture is a good idea. I can't let her do this, that man doesn't deserve it"

"I know that, an I wish there was somet I could do to help. If she's made up her mind, Brendan you can't change it."

"I'm going to the hospital, I need to see him. Maybe I can get Da to talk her out of it"

"Brendan you aren't going there alone, please let me come with you" Ste spoke concerned and edged his hand down the length of his arm.

"I want ye to come, but I warn ye though, he will be hateful towards ye, both of us. This is wrong for him, what we have together he hates"

"Don't give a damn about im, I can hold my own." Ste moves to walk around the breakfast table and next to Brendan.

"And Brendan? Merry Christmas" Ste grins holding up a piece of mistletoe. Brendan stands in front of Ste and flicks his eyes up at the flower.

"Seriously? Okay then" Brendan smiles, holding his fingers against Ste's cheek, widens his mouth over Ste's. Brendan's kiss is soft, seductive and intentional. Leaving Ste's pulse racing and his arm weaker lowering the mistletoe till he eventually lets it drop in favour of crossing his arms around Brendan's neck and tilting his head to deepen the kiss. Ste gasps when his back hits the counter behind him leaving their mouths ghosting. Brendan taps the side of Ste's thigh and he's up off his feet, Brendan's strong hands lifting Ste easily.

"Want your gift now?" Brendan asks and Ste nods in response, eyes darting quickly. Brendan carries Ste up the stairs. "Ye can unwrap me in bed"

* * *

Getting to the hospital was a painfully silent journey. Ste fiddled with his fingers and occasionally glanced at Brendan driving. There was a look of determination in his eyes, but there was something else inside them, a fear of seeing his father again. Ste could see it before they'd set off, while they had sat eating lunch together. Brendan had been off his food, and played around with it instead of eating. The normally contented man Ste knew was withdrawn and occupied with his thoughts.

"I'm sorry..." Brendan spoke with a consumed voice, his head turning quickly. Brendan indicated and parked up suddenly, rested his arms on the steering wheel and stared out of the windscreen. Ste parted his mouth with his nerves, shifting his body weight so he was straight and continued to look at Brendan.

"I can't..." Brendan whispers, his head weighted against his arms. "I can't see him again..."

"Hey..." Ste unbuckled his belt and spun to an angle. "It's okay ya know, you're going to be finding it difficult. We can turn back...what can I do ey?"

Brendan angled his head towards Ste and shifted his gaze over him. The older man felt a twinge in his heart at the sight of him. He was there and supportive, but Brendan still fought an internal battle. "Honestly, I wish I knew. I'm almost there, and I'm willing myself to keep driving, but...he's there in my head. The images that continue to roll over and over in my head Steven they, they are surreal"

"Right listen to me, I'm gonna be there the whole time an..."

"No, ye can't be though. I gotta face him myself just like ye did with Terrance. I just don't know how too"

Ste shifts closer to Brendan, somehow adjusting the passenger seat enough he can be nearer to him. Ste connects their eyes and does so quietly for a few moments until his hand moves and strokes through Brendan's hair. Ste's smile is equable. "I just meant I ain't gonna leave you. Whether it be in the room or outside of it, I will just be there. Brendan I know you're scared but after what he did to you it's normal. I won't let ya face him alone I promise"

Brendan lets his eyelids close as Ste continues to rake his fingers through his dark strands of hair. They massage and heal against Brendan's scalp and the soft moist of Ste's lips cool against his own slightly parted mouth. Brendan reciprocates Ste's kiss and flickers his eyes wide to see Ste's are shut. Brendan moves forward and connects them again, and once more before they part. Brendan starts the car engine up again and heads off towards the hospital as silence consumes the car.

* * *

Cheryl's eyes widen once she sees her brother walk into the hospital ward and her first reaction is to block him from moving any further, hand firmly on his chest they walk a little more, Brendan seemingly determined until Ste stops the pair of them.

"Brendan" Ste says, and when he looks at him Ste shakes his head. Brendan watches Ste before stepping back again and sniffing loudly.

"Where is he?" Brendan asks, his feet shift from side to side showing an acute anxiousness within him. Ste runs his hand down Brendan's arm and moves to link their fingers. Brendan crushes their hold and Cheryl witnesses it. Her eyes move back to Brendan then, a slight caution in them.

"He's...what's wrong Bren? Ye look like you've seen a ghost" Cheryl steps closer to her brother. "I don't understand why ye are here, thought ye didn't care"

"I need to see Da. Have ye been to see a doctor yet, have ye done anything?"

"I'm... I will see about the next step forward once you've seen Da"

"Don't do anything Chez, okay"

"Fine, but he's not as strong as he was so ye better not upset him Bren I swear"

"Don't upset _him?!_ Are ya actually serious?!" Ste suddenly angers and moves forward of Brendan to speak to Cheryl. The older man is quick to hold him back, arm firmly around his waist. Brendan takes him to one side and turns Ste to look at him.

 _"Steven..."_

 _"No Brendan, that's not fair. I know she's your sister but no"_

Brendan holds Ste's face in his palms, head shaking he closes his eyes and holds his forehead to Ste's. _"I can't let her find out this way okay, not now please"_

Ste sniffs and feels a lump in his throat, his arms wrap around Brendan's neck and they pull together tightly. "I'm sorry"

"Ye don't ever have to say that to me" Brendan speaks quietly into Ste's ear and as they hug Brendan captures Cheryl watching them wide mouthed. Brendan fleets a smile at her before moving back from Ste. "You'll be right here?"

"I ain't going anywhere" Ste moves to let Brendan go and he and Cheryl watch him walk into the room next to them. Cheryl then looks to Ste.

"How did ye get him to come here?" Cheryl asks, her expression still stunned.

"I love him" Ste turns to look at Cheryl. "I would never have got him to come here"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Cheryl sighs and sits on a chair, gestures to Ste to join her. "He's still keeping something from me, and ye know what that is. He's scared, I know my brother Ste...why can't he tell me?"

Ste stares at the floor and continues to breathe at pace, heart wild behind his rib cage as he worries about Brendan going into the room alone.

* * *

"Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in ey. Waifs and strays must be on the rise eh son?" The bitter old man's eyes followed Brendan as he rounded the room, keeping at a distance from the bed. Seamus' eyes were cold and lifeless staring through him and leaving dread to fill his stomach. Brendan tries to speak but it comes out as more of a lurch, body caving back in on itself an involuntary reaction Brendan cannot contain, he feels grubby and dirty. The walls seeming to shrink and pulse within his eyes as the room became a trap for him, Brendan glares at the door as an exit while his heart tells him to run for it. The old man laughs, teeth wide when Brendan flicks his eyes at him.

"What the hell's wrong with ye huh?! Cat took ye tongue too did it Brenda? Probably just as well, ye never had owt worth saying"

Brendan scowls at his father and the way he can belittle him in the blink of an eye. Like the continuance of a game never forgotten, nothing in his father's eyes had changed despite the many years that had passed by, he was still a twisted soul that created a deep seated fear within Brendan. Adrenaline rushing through his veins curling his clammy hands painfully by the side of him, Brendan renewed his confidence.

"So the drinking finally caught up with ye, always did stench of the stuff"

"Never heard ye complaining son. Always enjoyed a tipple if memory serves me well. Threw up like a whining girl after drinking too much of it too." Seamus laughed but in a moment of hesitation his eyes flashed remorse. "I've had a wake up call son. A second chance and once I am back on my feet my family will be around me again"

"If ye believe for one second that I'd come back then you're deluded. Chez can't help ye, ye need to tell her no" Brendan warns with a shaky breath.

"I need to do what? You're tellin your father what to do?" Seamus spoke in anger, trying to raise himself up off the bed and failing. "Ye miserable feck, look at ye, standing there all high an mighty. Where was ye all these years when your family needed ye huh? Run away with the circus did ye?"

"No Da, I moved to England to get as far away as possible"

"Oh yeah, they like your kind over there don't they, bet ye fit right in there Brenda. Circus kick ye out did they?" Seamus booms his laughter, laying his arms down both sides of him. "I don't expect your sister to go through the operation. I only planted that in her head because I knew you'd be too feckless to step up. She told ye though and like a good girl ye came running."

"Right then. Good. Cheryl ain't helping ye. My job here is done. I hope ye rot ye sadistic fuck" Brendan moves to walk out of the room.

"WAIT" Seamus warns, leaving Brendan to halt shoulders hunching. "Don't ye ever speak to me like that again if ye know what's good for ye" Seamus seethes, coughs harshly as he does. "Ye are gonna help me instead son. That's why you're here"

Brendan turns back slowly, eyes flicking up to his dad. Brendan shakes his head "What did ye say..?"

"Means it's all down to my son. It was my idea to get ye here and you'll do as I say"

"Ye expect me to save your life?" Brendan chuckles incredulous, hand gestured to the bed. _"After what ye did to me for all those years"_

"What are ye talking about, I did everything for ye. Repaying us by leaving, I had to pick up the pieces! Your sister was in bits because of it"

"I was _inconsolable_ because of what ye did to me! What did I do wrong ey?! All I ever did was love ye and ye betrayed me, hurt me without a second thought! Left me blaming myself... No, I'm leaving this hospital, and Chez is coming too."

"Walk out that door and I will make sure Cheryl has the operation to help me. Your choice son, what's it to be?"

* * *

Ste nibbles impatiently at his bottom lip and then at his knuckle, eyes continuously finding their way to the door which Seamus and Brendan are behind. Ste paces up and down a small area of the waiting room nervously. Cheryl smiles faintly at him and stands up.

"Love, you're gonna wear a hole in the floor, stop worrying! They've a lot to catch up on, it's been years since Bren was at home" Cheryl holds her hand to Ste's shoulder so he looks right at her.

"He doesn't want to be in there though. Maybe...maybe I should go in. It's been ages now hasn't it? He might need me" Ste suggests nervously, Cheryl shakes her head.

"Don't fret. They'll be fine. I'm gonna go to the bathroom and then grab something to drink, maybe a sandwich. Want anything?"

"Yeah, just get us a soft drink and one for Bren. Buttie each, take your time I'll er... I'll stick around" Ste nibbles at his lip and looks at the door. He waits till Cheryl has gone and dashes to it. Pauses with both his hands on the door, the beat of his heart shakes all his body and he's unsure what to do. Ste's thoughts for Brendan are strong though and that gives him the answer he needs. Ste gently pushes the door open.

Brendan strides over to the bed and leans down to his father, eyes wild. Seamus smirks but there's something else within his eyes, a quick flash of uncertainty. "Neither of us will help, I'll make sure of it. Ye haunted me all my life, ye won't get to do that any longer"

Seamus growls suddenly gripping Brendan by his wrist and raises his hand to strike him.

"NO! Don't ya _touch_ him!" Ste shouts and runs to the bed shocking both of them to look up. Ste pulls Seamus off Brendan and shoves him backwards, uneasy on his feet Brendan staggers.

"Steven!"

"You don't ever put your hands on him ya hear me?! I swear to god..."

 _"Steven..."_

"Bren?" Ste spins around and instantly holds around him. "Did he hurt you?"

"No...it's okay"

"I saw...an I had to stop him..." Ste sobs, gripping against Brendan's chest.

"H _ey...shh"_

"Jesus Christ is this some sick joke?" Seamus growls, his voice in warning has Brendan quickly holding Ste back but the younger boy has a tower of strength when determined.

"You're the sick joke aren't ya, likes to hurt kids! Can't get more sick, oh wait a moment. Yeah, _you_ can" Ste continues to try and get nearer to Seamus but Brendan has a powerful grip over him.

"Who is this Brenda? Your girlfriend?"

"Steven, ye need to leave alright? I'm okay"

"Am I his what... Listen right..."

"Oh, excuse me..." A nurse walks into the room and smiles, moves to check Seamus' chart and obs. Ste curls his fingers behind him and coaxes Brendan's to rub against them. Seamus notices the movement and becomes more and more irritated.

"Oh dear, high blood pressure. You'll need to rest up Mr Brady. Is this your son? We've heard loads about you, your Dad says you'll be the one donating? That's wonderful, especially as your sister's blood tests came back unmatched" The nurse spoke freely and without malice. Seamus shifted uncomfortably feeling his son's eyes boring right into him.

"Have ye heard about me?" Brendan drags his eyes off his dad to look at the young nurse, head angled to one side. "None of it is true" There's a forced laughter from Seamus, the world suddenly crashing down around him. Brendan soon follows suit, letting out a sharp chuckle.

"Can I ask you to come with me a moment? It won't take long, I am sure your boyfriend will keep your dad company" The nurse looks up at their shocked faces. "Oh...your sister just told me that..."

 _"Boyfriend?"_ Seamus almost chokes.

"Yeah, never could keep a secret my sister" Brendan scoffs and feels Ste's hand tighten. The nurse smiles and gestures through the door leaving Brendan to grab Ste who refuses to leave.

"I'll be okay, you go" Ste reassures Brendan who glares back at his father.

"I'll be two minutes" he warns eyes sorely on Seamus.

Seamus looks at Ste as soon as the door closes "Get your _filthy_ hands off my son"

"No" Ste replies firmly. "I'm here to protect Brendan from the likes of you"

Ste walks over to the bed and lays his palms down flat. "I love him. Not like you, the one who was supposed to look after him and cherish the ground he walks on. Instead ya thought hurting him in the most vile way was better. I hope you rot in hell ya unimaginable bastard"

"Who are ye to come in here and speak this way to me? I don't know what ye think ye know but..."

"I know ya raped Brendan. He told me. Imagine how devastated he was having to admit his own father did that. He was a little boy, a child. He couldn't defend himself against a twisted mind like yours and I'd kill you myself but you're already damned" Ste swallows and leans down to Seamus, both their eyes shaking with the adrenaline. "I will make sure Brendan doesn't help you. He listens to me. You'll die alone and scared, in this bed with nobody who cares. No one is gonna save you"

"Steven..." Ste turns his head as fast as Seamus looks up at him. Brendan stands frozen to the spot.

"Brendan" Ste's sigh is shaky, hands prizing off the bed. Seamus looks between them.

"Son, d'ye here what this sorry excuse is sayin about me? About your Da? I want him out of here" Seamus speaks, looking at Ste with disgust.

"Why Da, everything he said was true. Ye did do that to me, _for years"_

"What, why would ye tell such lies about your father. I took care of ye and this is how ye repay me? Ye disgust me, ye and your queer friend"

"I will help ye Da, I'll get the tests and if it's a match I will have the operation"

"What, NO!" Ste shouts at Brendan. "I won't let ya. You can't..."

"Did ye really think he'd choose ye over his father?" Seamus laughs _. "Thank ye son"_

"Only once you've told Chez the truth. About how ye sexually assaulted me from the age of eight onward. How ye beat on me and broke my arm. How ye called me names and belittled me time and time again with your cronies laughing on with ye" Brendan stands tall, arms folding tight around his chest his face remains blank. "Ye tell her everything and I will go ahead. Ye don't, and you'll never see Cheryl again"

"Ye little fecker!" Seamus moves to grab Ste by his jacket _. "This is your doing! I'll kill ye!"_

Brendan moves Ste away from his dad and crowds over him, presses his hand heavy to the old man's chest constricting his breathing until he writhes in pain. Brendan leans down to his ear. _"This is your punishment, either way ye lose. Ye no longer have that control over me and now you've got to decide whether to die sooner or live alone for the rest of your miserable existence"_

* * *

Ste sits close to Brendan once they're in the waiting room, holding a hand to his while Brendan thinks in silence. "You were amazing in there. I cannot imagine how hard that were. Will you really help him if he tells Cheryl?"

Brendan darts his eyes up as his sister walks in, tears in her eyes. _"Bren, I'm not a match, I'm sorry I didn't tell ye the truth. But I was so worried about Da, and ye wouldn't come to see us and..._

"Hey, it's alright. I'll do the test, for ye and only because ye mean the world to me. It was because of him I stayed away, not ye. I love ye Chez and whatever happens, I always will"

"I'll always love ye too Bren. I hope you'll both come and visit us once Da is up and feeling better?" Cheryl smiles fondly, eyes on Ste who swallows the lump in his throat.

"We'll see, right Bren?"

"Yeah, yeah... Look, Da has been asking for ye, go and see him alright. I'll be waiting here okay" Brendan hugs Cheryl and he and Ste watch her go in to the room. Brendan turns to Ste.

"I'm so tired" Brendan scoffs pinching the bridge of his nose. "Feel like I've never slept"

"Why wasn't you surprised about the results?"

"I knew something weren't right. Seamus, he's a master at manipulation. I need ye to go back home Steven" Brendan mumbles almost too quietly but Ste hears him, gazes up with a sheen of tears filling his eyes.

"No. Please don't send me away. You need me, ya even said that"

"I'll always need ye. Just right now I gotta be there for Chez. We need to talk and I need to explain" Brendan looks at the door. "I'm gonna tell her the truth about everything. So to answer your question, I won't be helping him. I know he won't admit what happened. I just hope she believes me"

"Chez will believe ya Bren. I know it." Ste says, he tightens his grip on Brendan's hand, a slight shake to it encourages Brendan to settle his other hand there. "Why would ya even make that up? He was so cruel...it breaks my heart I couldn't stop him."

"I'm not sending ye away because I want that Steven. I just know I'll need to spend every moment with ye if you're here."

They wander through the hospital and to the front of the building. Brendan speaks to the driver and then stands with Ste by the taxi door. Brendan looks drained and shattered and it just has Ste hesitating and not wanting to leave him.

"You'll come back to me right, promise cos I can't lose you Brendan"

Brendan smiles. "Go on, get in the cab. Don't worry about the fare, it's sorted."

 _"Bren._ Can ya give me a direct answer?" Ste's voice breaks.

"Thank ye. For helping me face up to my father" Brendan helps Ste into the cab. "I will be back when I can be"

"I'm not going home, I refuse" Ste pushes his way out of the taxi, the tears that had settled in his eyes now fall down his cheeks. Brendan thumbs them away. "I'll be waiting back at the apartment for ya, take as long as you need, I don't care but no way am I going home without you right"

"You're a stubborn, infuriating, beautiful man. And I love ye Steven Hay."

"Too bloody right. Good. So I'll..." Ste thumbs back at the car and climbs in it. They share a brief kiss mixed with the salty taste from both their tears and Brendan shuts the door waiting until Ste is out of sight.

* * *

Cheryl was sat in the waiting room when Brendan made it back there, her hair slightly mated with the amount of times she'd wrenched her fingers through it. Her eyes moved to greet him, smile quick but filled with warmth. Brendan swallowed and sat down beside her and leaned down on his forearms and stared at the floor beneath him, fingers absently stroking together. Cheryl watched the motion of them, and then looked at her brothers face.

"Where's Ste?" Cheryl said, her hand touched his back briefly.

"I sent him away" Brendan answered regretfully, and turned to his sister. "And now I'm frightened Chez"

"What, why? Is he really so important ye can't be without him?"

"It's not because of Steven, I'm scared ye won't believe me. Remember when we were kids, how happy ye were? The times we played together on those sand dunes. Ye brightened my day, those moments it was me and ye...they were my only solace. Tell me something, honestly. If I was as happy as you'd been back then, would I have left?"

"Well, no. But ye just wanted to leave home didn't ye, like all kids do."

"And never return? Not once have I come home, despite me and ye being that happy together. Chez, why didn't I ever come home?"

"Because of Da. Ye never once came back, even to see me." Cheryl said, her voice quiet with her thoughts catching up on her. She drew her gaze slowly back to Brendan who looked back in hope. "Why Bren, tell me why"

Brendan sighed heavy and shook his head. His phone buzzed inside his pocket.

 _'Be strong. I love u forever. x' S_

Brendan felt a tear fall down his cheek, and it was his sister that wiped it away. Her heart sank and she held him close. Brendan had never cried in front of her before. "I'm listening Brendan, and when you're ready to tell me, I'll believe ye"

* * *

Six months later

Dublin

They get a taxi through the city early evening having just left the airport, Brendan remains quiet but Ste links his hand and keeps it in place. Every now and then squeezing in comfort. Ste glances out of the window at the sights of Dublin, he likes the place, the feel of it. The river Liffey runs between the road there and the lights of a lit up bridge takes up his interest so he grips Brendan's hand until he acknowledges him.

"What is it?" Brendan asks, his voice sounds heavy with a tiredness he can't seem to shake free of over the last months that have passed by. He looks up at Ste glaring out of the window at something, so Brendan shuffles across to his side and looks himself. "That's the Liffey bridge"

"It looks cool all lit up. Can we walk on it?"

"What, right now? Chez is expecting us"

"Yeah, I know, but the fresh air will do you good. Is it far the pub from here? Could we walk back?" Ste turns to Brendan who is so close their cheeks brush together. Eyes searching each others, adoration keeping them shining and bright. Brendan manages a smile.

"We could walk from here. Come on"

Brendan urges the driver to park up so they can leave the cab. Brendan swings the door closed and follows Ste up and on to the bridge that hosts white metal sides and arches hanging with lights. Ste breathes in deeply through his nose and watches the river water sparkle ripples of mixed light from the bridge and street lamps. It's a world away from England, the place he grew up and the place they now lived.

"It's lovely here Bren. I wish you'd had a better life when you were growing up, would of appreciated it more with happier memories." Brendan encases his arms around Ste, brings their body warmth as one and leans down on his shoulder to look onto the river too.

"I did have some, the times me and Chez played together as kids"

"Did you ever come to this bridge?"

"No, I lived in a beach house with Chez and my Da. The pub is nearby but I spent a lot of the time at the pier and there's a lighthouse there too. I knew about the bridge though, passed it a lot. This is the first time I stopped on it"

"Good, this is ours then. I like it's something no one else has shared with you except me" Ste says, nuzzles into Brendan's cheek. "Brendan, I've fallen in love with you" Ste speaks nervously, the beat of his heart deafening. "I know we say it, that we love each other but it's so real for me this"

"Ye think I brought ye here for a trip, or just company? Hm?" Brendan moves to stand at the side of Ste and rests his arms on the metal sides of the bridge. "I feel the same about ye. All because ye decided to move in next door. Ye saved my life."

"You complete mine" Ste cups his mouth around Brendan's lips for a kiss, deep and drugging Ste's hand fingers through Brendan's hair and tickle along his neck. "Let's get out of here. Cheryl gonna think we've disappeared"

"I hate being in that pub, I don't want to take ye back there Steven" Brendan speaks suddenly, voice low. "Just not yet okay."

"Okay, what about a hotel. Just you and me, forget everything else" Ste suggests gripping a hold of his phone, he texts Cheryl.

 _'Ur brother just said he's in love with me, mind if I sneak im off to a hotel to celebrate? ;P' S_

 _'Ha ha. U go celebrate! Meet for a meal tonight?' C_

 _'If I have the energy I will. C u l8r xx' S_

 _'That's my brother! Yuk. L8r xx'_

Ste beams as he reads over the messages, hiding his phone from Brendan when he tries to nosy. They walk a while along the Liffey river and take in the scenes of Dublin before finding a hotel to check in to. Brendan stops them by the elevator.

"Ye want to go anywhere else first, somet to eat maybe?"

"No I'm okay. Chez will probably have somet planned won't she though. Do you?"

"No, come on"

The doors open and Ste bounds in, presses the number of the floor they are on. When they get to the room, it's small but has a good sized bed, table and chair in the corner. Ste walks over to the kettle.

"Do you want a brew?"

"How about ye forget the drink and just come here"

* * *

Ste lifted his hips, higher for deeper penetration, for more of Brendan. His thrusts were rough and heavy hitting his prostate every other stroke, Ste had never felt so euphoric, so aroused by sex with another man. Ste scratched his finger nails down Brendan's skin when he entered inside his body, matching his desperate need to have every part of him. Whispering words of encouragement Ste asked for it all, every thrust and jolt of his body. The bed moved and shifted towards the wall banging hard to echo with their loud moans around the room.

Brendan lay his head cushioned between Ste's neck and shoulder, he could feel the pulse of his heartbeat there and the moments it gained a quicker speed the longer they'd fucked each other. The hard mattress provided a hard surface and gave Brendan the leverage to guide his dick in and out of Ste's hole with a wet slip. The noise of the pace sloppy and loud heightening the enjoyment they were taking from this.

Brendan curved his hands around Ste's backside and pulled him closer, anchored them so he'd get each inch of cock flush inside. Ste gasped and had a giggle on his moans, a perfect gratified come on. Ste rutted himself, rubbed his sweet spot against the head of Brendan's dick.

 _"Bren, don't stop..."_

 _"Steven, fuck"_ Brendan held Ste, angling as high as possible exploding his come into the condom. Ste trembling, hitched a breath within the second silence of it, hugged Brendan tighter before coming himself. There was a moment they'd paused just to look at one another. Both breathing heavy and chests raising and falling in sync. Then they shared a deep kiss, wide mouthed and needy. Brendan's tongue swept desperately with Ste's.

Brendan huddled his warmth with Ste, wriggled his arms around him rocking back and forth between Ste's sweat covered thighs. Ste backs his head slowly against the pillow arching his neck. Brendan licks the length of Ste's throat and widens his mouth over Ste's Adams apple sucking against the thrum of his moans each time he slips inside Ste. Brendan kisses him, tilts his face and slips in all tongue leaving Ste to whimper and keen his hips to match Brendan's body movements. The younger boy lifts off the bed, hands stretching up to the headboard and biding against it. Ste lets his legs fall wide and loose, pelvis flicking up and down through their comedown, mouth open while mewling at Brendan's touch. Ste wraps his body around Brendan and moves them to one side, continues the lazy tongued kisses until they're sleepy and contented enough to stop.

"Uh, wow" Ste hums contentedly, strokes his hand through Brendan's hair as he lays across his body. "So happy"

"So shagged" Brendan scoffs and brushes his bead across Ste's chest.

"How long do you plan on staying in Dublin?" Ste asks, his fingers tug gently at the dark strands of hair.

"I don't know. I need to try and build bridges with Chez. Since Da died, it's taken a weight off both of us but at the same time left devastation for her"

"He was a monster, took your innocence away like it was his right too. A man you trusted Bren, I still cannot believe anyone could be that cruel to a child. I couldn't help what I said and I am sorry if I spoke out of turn but I wasn't gonna stand by. There was no way he was gonna tell her the truth you had no choice. Give Cheryl time, we're here at her asking so that tells me things will be alright"

Brendan softly kisses Ste, rests his forehead with his. "Ye were amazing, no has ever stood up for me like that"

Ste hugged his arms around Brendan's neck. "Told ya I'd protect you"

"Now you've left college and worked your arse off, I think ye should go travelling, like ye wanted too"

"Brendan, you cannot be serious. I'd go nuts not seeing you, no. Absolutely not, what about my job as well"

"Teaching. I really did pursue it to annoy my father. It's time I did something different. So, if ye want I'll come with ye. We can visit different places together try the cuisine and ye can pick up new cooking ideas. Ye could pick up a new postcard in each city we visit and send them to your friends. At least we can do this until our money runs out" Brendan shifts them when Ste starts to feel the cold in the room and brings the covers over them. Ste turns around and backs into Brendan's warmth.

"It's not what ya want though. Only doing it for me, that's not fair. It was an idea, right because I never got to go anywhere. No holidays or anything. You taking me away really meant loads to me and I kinda got the travel bug, that's only reason I said it"

"Right so, where are we going first? Will we need passports?" Brendan smiles when Ste nudges back his elbow.

"We're here. Show me Ireland first and then we can stick a pin in a map" Ste beams, stroked along Brendan's arm around him. "We'll end up driving each other mad. Can't wait"

"Me either" Brendan agreed. "I have something for ye"

Brendan leans over Ste and fetches his jacket closer, fumbles in the inside pocket and brings out a small black velvet case. Chucking his jacket back on the chair, Brendan watches Ste's eyes flicker from him to the box.

"That's for me?" Ste asks, eyes looking back at Brendan. He passes it to Ste. "What is it?"

"Open and find out" Ste cracked the box open and Brendan shuffled up to lean on his elbow. "It's your Twenty first soon, so I got ye this"

"You'll still be spending my birthday with me though right?" Ste asks, and looks inside. Then he turns to Brendan. "It's a key"

"Perceptive, well done."

Ste strokes the cool metal between his fingers, studies the shine of the freshly cut key. "I don't..."

"Twenty first, key to the door. My door. When we return home ye could move in with me; seems silly ye being the boy next door now. I'd rather you're under my roof, permanently"

"Yes! Brendan! It's my favourite present ever. Can I pack now?" Ste turns in Brendan's arms, his kisses become more and more uncoordinated leaving laughter between each one. "It's always now init? Me and you, we're always"

"Kinda hoping you'd say that." Brendan smiles "I love ye Steven"

Ste beams against Brendan's kiss, the words leave his heart expanding. Nothing had ever been so easy or right for either of them. "I love you too"


End file.
